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I hate IEP days

CaptainSeriousCaptainSerious member
in Special Needs

I'm always blindsided.  Always.  Even the day they gave us everything we asked for--because I was sure they were going to fight us on everything (as they have in the past) that I worked myself up so much before we went in.  I'm always stunned and shocked when I come out.  Today was no exception.

They agreed to keep M's program exactly as it's bee, as we liked it...and recommended he participate in the extended school year program.  It's a fantastic, one-month, morning program that has a waiting list, and M would have a spot if we agree.  The thing is, it's 2.5 weeks until the end of school, and he's SO looking forward to his summer break.  He's supposed to be on the swim team, which would directly overlap the ESY program, and through which he finally made a lot of local friends. It really helped his self-confidence and social skills last year, and he even went to the championships.

So now we have to decide what's best for him as a whole person, not just a student. We know the program would be a huge help in him not backsliding too much over the summer, and we are thrilled the district/child study team is finally seeing the full extent of his needs, but we also know that we've made other plans for him and been getting him excited about them (part of the reason I left my job was so that he could be on swim team and not have to go to camp all day), and I really don't want to make this choice. I also am trying really hard to make the beat choice and not let the fact that he may hate me for this affect my decision, but when it comes to something this big (in terms of how a 3rd grader views the world), I'm having a really hard time towing the line.

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Re: I hate IEP days

  • CaptainSeriousCaptainSerious member
    We were told the program ran for a month, M-Th, 8:30 -12:00. I don't know if there are any options, but I will ask.
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  • finsupfinsup member
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    Man that's a tough call.

    On one hand, it's very difficult to advocate for services if you have eastablished a hx of refusing them. Given that you are working to make sure the school doesn't lower their academic expectations of your children, refusing services for a recreational activity sends a message that you don't see the academic piece urgently. 

    On the other, in the bigger picture? 14 hours a week for 4 weeks isn't going to have that big an impact on his ultimate outcome.

    Sometimes we have to make difficult choices. We went without sharing DS's dx and getting ASD social skills services because it would have excluded DS from the reading program I wanted and he needed. I knew it would be a finite glitch, but it was a hard choice to make.

    One good that came out of it was that the choice to concentrate on academics proved to DS 1) how important they are as a family value and 2) that I totally believed in him as a potentially strong student. As much as I wanted the district to know I believed in DS's potential, I wanted him to believe it more. 

     

    I can relate with this statement.  Our first summer in the school system DS qualified for ESY, (he hasn't since) and I honestly thought it was a waste of time for us.  I know that other kids get a lot out of it, and keeps them on task without too much regression over the summer, but that was not our experience.  It was more of a Pain in the butt than anything and if he had qualified again I probably would not have done it anyway.

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