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I want to punch my cousin in the face - NBFR

karatechrissykaratechrissy member
in Blended Families

Sorry, this is another post about my dad. You can exit now if you're over hearing about it. I started grief counseling this week, so I shouldn't be so annoying in the future, but I have to get this out.

Yesterday was the 3 month 'anniversary' of my dad's passing. That's a terrible word to use... not sure if there is another more appropriate? Anyway, I posted on FB that I love and miss my dad. I really keep my FB posts positive and mostly about my kids. I haven't posted about my dad on there really since around the time it happened. I had a few friends comment some things. Then my cousin, who always makes EVERYTHING about her, says 'I know. I miss my uncle SO much. My grandmother cries every time we see her. My heart hurts so bad'

I want to PUNCH this lady. A - The last time she saw my dad she was like 17. It was like 5 years ago. She never spoke with him on the phone. They weren't close. I don't doubt she is sad. I hope she is. But is it bad that it makes me angry that she thinks her pain is anywhere close to what mine is. It probably sounds stupid but I can't help but be infuriated. B - HER grandmother is also MY grandmother! Every time she talks about our grandma she says 'mine' or 'my'. I'm like WTF!? My family is so weird...

And I'm crazy. I know. I know. This shouldn't bug me. But it does. I'm just angry. And sad. And still really sensitive about it. I know people are allowed to have their feelings... but, as dumb as this sounds, I feel like my sister and brother and I are the ones who hurt the most. We're the most directly effected by him passing... dammit no one else is allowed to equate their pain with ours. 

Am I totally insane for feeling like this?  

 

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"Karma1969: If baking someone a birthday pie/cake is romantic, I must be a slut."
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Re: I want to punch my cousin in the face - NBFR

  • MrsHetzelMrsHetzel member
    Im sorry for your loss, my condolences.

    You're Not insane. I get it. Some people are just attention hogs. Let it roll off your shoulders. You know what you and your siblings and your father shared and that's what counts.
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  • mrslucidmrslucid member

    imageandrea99:
    I also vote not insane.  That was just rude of her, IMO.

    Agreed, I'd like to throat punch her for you.

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  • AlohaloveAlohalove member
    imagemrslucid:

    imageandrea99:
    I also vote not insane.  That was just rude of her, IMO.

    Agreed, I'd like to throat punch her for you.

    Double throat punch!!! 

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  • xmaryrickxxmaryrickx member
    Not insane at all. There is nothing worse than a tragedy whore.

    It reminds me of when my Gma died and my cousin acted a fool. Oh the wailing the flailing. The absolute distress. Umm, where were you when she was alive? She was dying for like three years, yet you couldn't be bothered to drive two hours or less to come visit? No? No you couldn't? Well then, STFU.

    Seriously, nothing I hate worse than tragedy whores. Nothing.
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  • twister22twister22 member

    Not insane. I'm trying to think of what I would post in the same situation. Probably something like "Your dad was such an amazing person, and I know he is very missed. Praying for you and love you."

    I can't believe your cousin said that.

    I'm sorry Chrissy, still praying for you. I hope grief counseling helps. And I second what PP said, block your cousin from commenting. 

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  • karatechrissykaratechrissy member
    Thank you guys. I'm hoping the grief counseling is going to help. The first session went well. I just feel like every day is really a struggle to get through. I cry multiple times a day. I'm emotional just drained. I'm losing things left and right because I'm not really 'here' when I'm doing things... I'm busy thinking about my dad. I know grief is different for everyone, I just feel it is consuming my life. I know my dad wouldn't want that. And as much as I try to tell myself to stop, I feel like me telling myself to stop makes it worse. Still haven't looked at financial stuff. I just can't. I dug it up and tried to flip through it the other day and I just couldn't make heads or tails of anything over the tears. I just want to feel like me again, and when ppl say 'I know I miss him so much too!' I just want to throw a desk at their faces. My life every day is effected by this. Not other ppl. Not his friends or neighbors... Certainly NOT my friggin cousin who hadn't spoken to him in years. Ugh. You can see why I need therapy... This is long...
    Visit my <a href"http://www.etsy.com/shop/ThisIsTheStuffs">Etsy</a> shop!


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    MyFitnessPal - Free Calorie Counter


    "Karma1969: If baking someone a birthday pie/cake is romantic, I must be a slut."
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  • stephcarterstephcarter member
    Hugs! I can't even imagine what you are going through. Your cousin sounds so selfish and immature. For her to say that was 100 percent wrong.

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