What would you do?

Rose120 · June 2013

We have some good friends with a baby that live across the street. Sometimes when my baby is napping I take my video monitor across the street and sit on her front porch with her, where I can see my house and it is the middle of the day....

Her and I are going to dinner/drinks with some other girls Saturday night. My husband thinks it's ok to put the baby to bed and sit in their house at night and watch the baseball game/hang out. I think this is totally different from it being during the day and being able to see the house. He thinks as long as he is right across the street and he has the video monitor that it doesn't matter. Our daughter is just about 4 months.

What are your thoughts? Am I being too paranoid or him not enough? We live in a safe neighborhood and have a dog that would go ballistic if anyone came in, but it still doesn't sit right with me. Thoughts?

caseylynw · June 2013

I personally wouldn't like it. Its night, and when your watching a sports game you wont be paying attention to the monitor as much as when your just sitting on the porch. Maybe he wouldn't mind bringing the baby over to the house with him? That would make the most sense to me, especially if he and your friends husband will both be watching the babies at the same time. It's more convenient

Rose120 · June 2013

He will bring her over from like 6-8 but then wants to come back and put her to bed in her own bed and then go back over there.

TMWarren85 · June 2013

I know that my husband loves our kids more than anything in the world and has the best intentions as a parent. I also know that I hear the monitor before he does (day or night), and I also know that during sporting events (especially a game he's into) he doesn't hear me talking to him until I'm halfway through my story and have to repeat it to him because he's so zoned in on whatever he's watching. I wouldn't be comfortable if that were the case- I'm just glad LO will be older when football season starts otherwise I wouldn't be able to leave the house on the weekend

It's all your comfort level; if you don't feel comfortable then tell him.

rjeller32 · June 2013

Have you considered asking DH and the neighbor to hang out at your house instead? Personally, it wouldn't bother me, but if it doesn't sit right with you voice your opinion and offer other options.

DCKate · June 2013

No way.

jobiann · June 2013

I wouldn't do that, technically it's neglect....being a parent sometimes means you have to give up certain things including social activities.

Rose120 · June 2013

rjeller32:
Have you considered asking DH and the neighbor to hang out at your house instead? Personally, it wouldn't bother me, but if it doesn't sit right with you voice your opinion and offer other options.

The neighbor is having a few guys over his house and he has a baby 6 weeks younger than ours...so same situation. We've been discussing it and he will certainly not do it if I'm not 100% ok with it, but just thought I would ask here to see if people think I'm being unreasonable or not...

rjeller32 · June 2013

Rose120:
rjeller32:
Have you considered asking DH and the neighbor to hang out at your house instead? Personally, it wouldn't bother me, but if it doesn't sit right with you voice your opinion and offer other options.
The neighbor is having a few guys over his house and he has a baby 6 weeks younger than ours...so same situation. We've been discussing it and he will certainly not do it if I'm not 100% ok with it, but just thought I would ask here to see if people think I'm being unreasonable or not...

Well, I don't think you are being unreasonable by any means personally. I would tell my DH if he really wants to go across the street, he can bring a swing or a PnP or my LO to sleep in while he is there. You could consider that option.

Rose120 · June 2013

thanks ladies

sschwege · June 2013

I wouldn't be comfortable with that.

pitterpatter129 · June 2013

No, but I wouldn't do the daytime thing either. If they also have a baby, why doesn't your DH just put the baby to bed there? He could bring over a pack n play or blanket for the floor and the babies could share a nursery until it was time to go home.

perfectlove09 · June 2013

I would absolutely not be ok with it.

EPQueen · June 2013

Nope, I would not be okay with that.

orangegoggles · June 2013

Nope, I wouldn't be ok with it either for a number of reasons.

I'd either have him bring over the pack and play or not go at all.

dande2129 · June 2013

Call me paranoid, but I wouldn't even do what you do.... Too much can happen too quickly. That being said, I definitely don't think it's okay for what he's going to do.

It sounds like you're justifying it by saying you live in a safe neighborhood and have a dog, but really, those things don't mean squat if there's a sudden fire (or another tragedy) A lot of horrible things have happened in "safe neighborhoods."

It's ultimately up to you and your H though.

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