Dads & Dads-to-be
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first time dad need men advice

So my fiance is always on these websites and told me about the community forums..so since I can't sleep I figured I would take a look. And found this hopefully I can get some helpful answers. 

So this is our first child. She is 21 weeks pregnant. And I feel horrible. The first couple of months of being pregnant my fiance wanted NOTHING to do with any sexual activity. Even shower together. I know she became real uncomfortable and insecure with the changes and our communication is extremely well in our relationship. We do talk about everything. So I did comfort her and respect her feelings. About a month ago she got her sex drive plus a desire like a teenage boy going through puberty. And now I am the one with no sex drive.

We have talked about it, I feel horrible. Its not a fear of hurting the baby..I'm not unattractive to her at all. I am just not in the mood. I know its starting to upset her.. I try but she's so understandable. Our relationship is great. I just don't understand.

Anyone else feel this way? Had the same experience? Any advice on how to help this pass over?  

Re: first time dad need men advice

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    Just give it time. Don't just try for sex right away. You're both going through a major life change. You'll either have the sex drive and she won't, or vise versa, or maybe both of you will be in the mood in a not so convenient time. Sounds like you both get the communication part. Just go about your typical routine, maybe try to do a little more around the house for her. Start with gentle massages, get playful with her even if you're not in the mood, doesn't take much for a guy to get interested. Before you know it, you'll be making love like you were pre pregnancy. perhaps more.
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    WulfgarWulfgar member
    I agree with the other poster, give it time.  You are going through a major life change and the stress of this can cause issues.  Since you both are really good at communicating keep it up.  It gets worse after the child is born.  We are trying to conceive our second and we get blocked by the kid.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker


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    I am sort of going through this right now. She is 25 Weeks pregnant. She wants it a lot and I don't. I don't even know why. It is pretty frustrating because she is so attractive to me, but she gets upset about it. It will be fine in the long run, but as far as advice, just make sure she knows that you love her, and are as attracted to her as ever.
    My Dad Blog - Pregnancy From a Guy's Perspective http://pregoformen.blogspot.com @PregoForMenBlog
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