Men at baby shower?

spanx21 · June 2013

So I'm contemplating having a joint baby shower....doing something like "diaper and beer party" for all the guys while the ladies have the "baby shower". Is this stupid? Has anyone ever been to something like this? My family is scattered all of the place and a lot of people would have to travel 3+ hours to get to the shower. I thought it would be a good way to get the entire family back together as well as celebrating the baby. Any input is appreciated, good or bad.... And if you think this is a good or neat idea, any suggestions on how to word the invitation?

muffyvonmuff · June 2013

I always prefer parties to have both guys and girls. All women events are such a snooze. My Bridal shower had both and it was just a fun a party. Just write both names on the invite so they realize its not a girl only party.

Arod1087 · June 2013

My first shower is all girls but my second one will be a joint shower so I can see all the family/friends. We will have kegs and BBQ. No games though, it will be more like a family BBQ with baby presents.

jelaine310 · June 2013

I'm having a co-ed baby shower. A lot of women in my family have and it's not weird at all. I do think it's a bit strange to call it a Diaper and Beer Party though. Not personally the tone I'd like to set. Just do your normal baby shower but modify the games, or eliminate some of them. We have a lot of male friends, and I really wanted my husband included in the day. I'm looking forward to my DH and all of his manly friends bonding over games for baby Isabella

sleepy33 · June 2013

Arod1087:
My first shower is all girls but my second one will be a joint shower so I can see all the family/friends. We will have kegs and BBQ. No games though, it will be more like a family BBQ with baby presents.

This was how one of my bridal showers was and one of my baby showers will be. Especially if you've got family coming in, it seems weird to tell the husbands/men not to come, they love you and want to see you, too. Just make it like a regualr party where you happen to have gifts, and don't get bogged down in those dumb games nobody likes anyway.

laurenmdrn16 · June 2013

Apparently, I did not know the meaning of the word baby shower when talking with my MIL. She is very fussy about etiquette and almost had a heart attack when I said I wanted a Labor Day party at my house (we have a gorgeous yard, deck, and pool) to celebrate the baby. I did use the words "baby shower" but said I wanted men, women and children there. My MIL said "Well, that is not a baby shower! I am throwing you a baby shower and it will only have adult women there to give you gifts. That is a baby shower."

First of all, super grateful that she wants to do that, but I hope my mom is at least consulted. Also, I hate being the center of attention so a big family cookout is way more my style. I just would hate for it to be a repeat of my bridal shower (massive drama between my MOH and MIL because my mom felt completely left out, but didn't want to rock the boat so my MOH went into full battle mode).

sleepy33 · June 2013

laurenmdrn16:
Apparently, I did not know the meaning of the word baby shower when talking with my MIL. She is very fussy about etiquette and almost had a heart attack when I said I wanted a Labor Day party at my house (we have a gorgeous yard, deck, and pool) to celebrate the baby. I did use the words "baby shower" but said I wanted men, women and children there. My MIL said "Well, that is not a baby shower! I am throwing you a baby shower and it will only have adult women there to give you gifts. That is a baby shower."
First of all, super grateful that she wants to do that, but I hope my mom is at least consulted. Also, I hate being the center of attention so a big family cookout is way more my style. I just would hate for it to be a repeat of my bridal shower (massive drama between my MOH and MIL because my mom felt completely left out, but didn't want to rock the boat so my MOH went into full battle mode).

Why not see if your mom wants to host your (awesome sounding) Labor Day shower, and let your MIL host her stuffy ladies' party? Or would it basically be the same people at both showers? .

ksimo6 · June 2013

We're having a "diaper bash" - admission is a pack of diapers and a pot luck item. We have a ton of stuff from my bro and sis and don't really need much... I am also very uncomfortable with a lot of focused attention (i.e having to open gifts in fron tof dozens of people...), so we decided to go this route. Guys and kids are invited. It's more of a BBQ than a shower. Should be fun!

ballygirl · June 2013

My shower will have men there. I don't have many friends nearby so it will mostly just be my extended family and DH's family, including husbands.

spanx21 · June 2013

love that idea... might have to steal it!!

KerCo51 · June 2013

My mother just told me that she is planning to have a BBQ for my shower and invite the men to hang out inside during the gifts and any other stuff they're not interested in. I am actually really happy with that. I know there were a handful of showers I have been to that I would have preferred DH to come with me.

StefMurph · June 2013

We're doing a BaByQ. Women inside and men outside cooking, visiting and watching any kids they bring while they swim. My sister is throwing the shower and just let me know there will be games and she wants to guys to play. I guess I should play along since this will be her only niece. I hate baby shower games, but I'll smile and play along.

Amjoy25 · June 2013

I'm having a coEd baby shower. I think it's pretty common these days.

sooner1981 · June 2013

I think it is never appropriate to host your own shower. But if a friend or family member wants to host, you can certainly tell them if they ask that you would like it to be co ed

UmmLayla · June 2013

Growing up I was taught Baby Showers are for women. Now my family includes the men. Many traditions have changed and I'd say it should be the preference of the expectant mother... However my family never has alcohol at baby showers. If the guest of honor can't drink NOBODY does, that's a rule I doubt will ever change in my family.

spanx21 · June 2013

sooner1981:
I think it is never appropriate to host your own shower. But if a friend or family member wants to host, you can certainly tell them if they ask that you would like it to be co ed

I'm not hosting my own. My MIL is doing the honors and was asking a lot of questions this weekend so I was just wondering everyone's thoughts. I agree with you, I don't think it's appropriate to host your own shower either.

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