Rooming in with baby at the hospital

stacy&seth · June 2013

So last time I had been in labor 36 hrs and I hadn't had sleep for three nights. Baby started in my room, but ended up in the nursery except to nurse when the nurses brought him in to me. I was talking about this and got grief from someone over that decision. I plan to have this one room in, but if I'm exhausted I will cave and take the mini break. I really shouldn't feel bad about something that happened five yrs ago, but now... So have you all given thought to rooming in vs getting some nighttime help?

Amanda&EricB · June 2013

Do not feel guilty! The nurses/nursery are there for a reason. Get the rest and accept the help while you can! My son stayed in the nursery overnight and it did either of us any harm.

Bkuhman · June 2013

Take advantage of the offered help bc once you are home its all you until you have help from some others.

PrimRoseMama · June 2013

I say everyone has different needs. If you need to send baby to the nursery then do it. It might be the last restful night you get for a very long time.

Abeille · June 2013

Last time I made every effort to keep the little one in the room with me as much as possible. My labor was shorter than yours but I hadn't gotten good sleep in a couple of days and DD was born in the wee hours of the morning, so no sleep that night either. Looking back I wished I'd taken more of an opportunity to rest b/c I certainly didn't get much of a chance once I was home.

I'm delivering at a new hospital this time that makes a great effort to keep mom and baby together...baths, pedi visits, etc are all done in the room. I love that they do this, but I am sure I will be taking advantage of the respite nursery down the hall at some point during my stay, most likely at night.

karirlaw · June 2013

I wouldnt feel bad AT ALL. The nurses at my hospital encourage it and say we should take the break while we can get it. I always room in, but that just cause I'm clingy, not bc i think its bad to take the break!

Get sleep when you can sister!

BBBelly · June 2013

Do what you need to do! It's in the best interest of the baby if you need the break. I went on a hospital tour of my maternity ward recently and the nursery was empty and the guide said several times it was cause they discourage usage of the nursery and encourage rooming in. I didn't like the repeated emphasis on this. I plan to room in but I'm a FTM and if I really feel exhausted I refuse to feel bad about taking a break. I'm on my own after that anyway.

MyPlus5 · June 2013

I agree with all of the PP's, that you should take a break if you need one to recover. I had an emergency c-section with my son, and was so out of it that there was no way I could care for our baby in our room 24 x7. I was terrified to be left alone with him because I could not get out of bed. The nurses were great and told me to bring him to the nursery anytime. I ended up doing this at night, bringing him down very late at night and then getting him again early the next morning.

KikiCohen · June 2013

I'm planning on rooming in, but realize that it's just like everything else with pregnancy and delivery- it can change. Don't let other people make you feel guilty. You have to do what's best for you and I'm sure the nurses made sure your baby was just fine.

blueturkey12 · June 2013

Our hospital encourages rooming in so much that they don't even have a nursery. What was once the nursery is now called the "Procedure Room" and they make it known that the baby is to stay with Mom at least 23 out of 24 hours a day...so, guess I'll be rooming in : ) They do have second beds in the rooms to make it comfortable for help to spend the night so we will be taking advantage of that.

klyann · June 2013

My hospital encourages rooming in, but the nurses will take LO for a bit at night. They are VERY pro BF though, so they made sure that DD was back every 2-3 hours to nurse. I will play it by ear and be flexible this time around.

see2211 · June 2013

Don't feel guilty! I had a very long labor too that started in the middle of the night, so I was going on about 1 hour of sleep in the past 36 hours. We did not room in. We got to see our DD whenever we wanted though, and they brought her in every couple of hours regardless. We still didn't get a ton of sleep, but my DH and I could barely function after deliver- we needed that time to rest up because it was much tougher at home! We may do the same thing this time... it's nice to have the extra help for a day or two so we can rest and prepare for our first days at home. We have a toddler too this time, so it may be extra challenging! I'm sure your hospital will let you decide then and change your mind at any time.. the circumstances may dictate what you want to do.. but again- please don't feel guilty!

kcox123 · June 2013

I have sent all three of mine to the nursery at night at the advice of my (slightly older) mom friends. Last chance you will have for a trained medical staffer who's already being paid anyway to watch your baby while you sleep. Babies are noisy and wriggle around and I cannot sleep through ANY of that.

i will do the same this time.

MRads · June 2013

I will do rooming in, but if I need help or a break, I will send the baby to the nursery. Don't feel bad. When you have just had a baby and you are going through some many emotions and you have all the hormones going through your body, sometimes you just do what you have to do.

jennipalmer · June 2013

Because of my baby's size and my awful recovery I needed help. When DD was born the rooms were semi private and my ExH did not stay in room with my overnight. I could not dead lift my daughter...I could hold her and feed her but it was a few days before I could feel comfy. So, don't feel bad at all get rest!!!!

Liz4444 · June 2013

Li slept in the nursery, we will be doing that again.

Stina2012 · June 2013

Oh no, you let your child go sleep in the care of trained medical professionals, the horror! People can go jump in a lake (umm, thanks to the July 13'r who uses this phrase, I am stealing it).

We're likely rooming in because I am a big worry wart. And my DH is just ready to hold her, seriously he is so excited to hold baby girl!

stacy&seth · June 2013

Thanks everyone for chiming in on this! I was beginning to think I was somehow not maternal for taking that break. I think if I wasn't under the influence of hormones I would have bucked up to her instead of internalizing and feeling guilty today.

melissabshelton · June 2013

We're hoping to mostly room in this time due to me going in as a "no info patient" (thanks crazy family!) and we don't want people finding out we're at the hospital and showing up and snooping through the nursery window. But since I will go home to 2 other children, if I need a break and some rest I will absolutely send the baby to the nursery. There is medical staff to watch him, if they need me I'm right down the hall, and we're paying for access to the nursery so I may as well use it here and there. I had PPD with DD1, started meds once I left the hospital with DD2, and will start meds as soon as I deliver. I'm taking advantage of the help available.

[Deleted User] · June 2013

I'm cool with my baby sleeping in the nursery if need be, no biggie...don't feel guilty:)

TCoker456 · June 2013

Our hospital doesn't allow sending the baby to the nursery, the only time baby isn't with mom is when he/she is with the pediatrician for about 15 min every morning. This is my first, so I really don't know what I'm getting myself into, but I would love the opportunity for extra help from staff since I don't know what I'm doing.

jebrmbbeb · June 2013

At first I didn't want them to take my daughter but then my husband convinced me I needed the rest and it was the best decision! Don't feel bad. I plan to keep baby in my room most of the time but if I need a break for sleep I'm going to take advantage of the help again.

SunnyMuffin · June 2013

With my son I was up for 2 days straight being induced the night before and in labor all day. I got such a crap sleep the night he was born because you wake up at every little peep. There was no nursery but I would definitely take advantage of a good stretch of sleep (even 5-6 hours) if it was avail

thegoodpotato · June 2013

Hospital policy in BC doesn't allow the newborn to leave the room without a parent. There aren't any nurseries.

That being said, with my first, because she was born in the middle of the night, and I had hemorraged, the nurses took mine to the nursing station (after affixing appropriate ID) to let me rest. I think it was only for about an hour or an hour and a half, but it really helped to get that bit of rest before baby needed to nurse again.

I definitely recommend taking a mini break if necessary, even if it means husband/grandma/grandpa holds baby for an hour while you get some rest....

rachelle_paige82 · June 2013

First off--don't let anyone make you feel bad about a decision that you make. You're the Mama and if you don't take care of yourself, you can't take care of the baby.

With my first I had him in the nursery overnight--except to nurse--and even then I still wasn't sleeping through the night solid (he was a hungry guy) but it was much better than the sleep I got once I got home.

I'm planning on doing the same thing this time and actually am planning that I'll pretty much be on my own at nights at the hospital (my DH is taking turns with the grandmas when it comes to watching our 3 year old).

Erinm278 · June 2013

My plan is to have the baby stay with us.

Eyefrog · June 2013

I feel its whatever feels right for the mom. I have roomed in and the one time I didn't get to(baby was in special nursery) we never quite bonded the way I prefer, it wasn't terrible and I ended up hanging out in the nursery not sleeping anyway lol. Whatever works for you is what works best, don't let anyone else tell you how to feel.

pgermain11 · June 2013

I'll probably have the baby room in with me all the time. I just know how I am and I'm not going to want the baby out of my sight. Plus how much sleep can you really get if they are constantly coming in to check up on you and so on?!

I'd play it by ear and if the LO is sleeping well and I see that I'm resting a little, I'll leave em in the same room. If you are just too exhausted to function then do what's best for yourself and let the nurses take care of him/her.

luvmyducks · June 2013

Our hospital doesn't have a nursery. But if it did, DD would still be with me all the time.

Do what is best for you and don't feel guilty.

Amanda&EricB · June 2013

What if you are a single mom with nobody there with you? You will need a shower at some point right? We were told at no point whatsoever to leave baby alone in room. So...the baby would have to go somewhere?

BlueJewelM · June 2013

I had DS with me the entire time.

I will not do that again. I was exhausted when I got home. This time I plan to send baby to nursery at night and to bring back to me for feedings. With a toddler at home as well I want to return home as well rested as possible.

queenbone · June 2013

We mostly had the boys room in with us. But since I had c/s both times and had to stay for 4 days I think we did have DS2 go to the nursery for a night (except for nursing.)

It is a very delirious time, don't feel guilty.

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