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Working Moms
honeybee111
member
NWMR: MIL is driving me crazy vent
honeybee111
member
in Working Moms
I just gave birth to DS a week ago, and our DD is 3. I normally have a very good relationship with MIL, but she's a NICU nurse, and EVERYTHING is "OMG, you're doing WHAT???? Did you know about this disease/medical condition? You might cause brain damage/suffocate your baby/whatever horrible consequence." She did this when DD was born, too, and she ended up having a big fight with DH because DH told her to back off and stop stressing us out. I kind of thought her behavior was just due to being overly concerned, DH and I were new parents, etc. So, anyways, she's doing it again with DS, and I have a lot less patience for it now. I mean, I may not know EVERYTHING about newborns, but I'm fairly confident I can feed/change/swaddle one without causing irreversible damage. Plus, add in recovery from c-section + taking care of DD, and I don't have much patience for anything these days. At least she lives out of town, so she can't hover too much, but she does call every day to check how the baby is doing. She asks questions like how much weight has he gained since yesterday? Ummm, we don't know. Then, she freaks out because HOW CAN YOU NOT KNOW???? DH has been taking her calls because I don't want to talk to her. She just called right now, and I let it go to voicemail. I'm so exhausted and hormonal, I don't really care if I'm being a bad daughter-in-law.
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Re: NWMR: MIL is driving me crazy vent
Actually, she's only a great babysitter in the infant stage. Once DD became mobile, she didn't really do a good job of watching DD. For example, one time DH and I came home for find her allowing DD to climb on our dining room table and play with the chandelier! She also doesn't really know how to play with a kid - she'll just sit on her ipad, expect DD to entertain herself, and then complain to DH and I that DD was acting "needy".
+1
TB had an article a year or so ago suggesting that you change your voicemail message to a brief update on the baby and welcome people to leave messages that you may or may not return - sounds like the perfect remedy for your MIL. You can share what you like without giving her the chance to ask you a ton of follow up questions.
BTW - it's totally not normal to track daily weight gain for a healthy, full term baby. She must know that right? I mean, doesn't she see babies outside the NICU on occasion?