Sleep Update- LONG

orangegoggles · June 2013

Many of you know that DS has been struggling with sleep for months now. He typically can't get past sleep cycles and wakes every hour or so. He also requires rocking and soothing so basically we're (I) am up all night long.

I've been reading Ferber and originally planned to wait until closer to 6 months. Well last night, H was working late, I was alone and exhausted so I decided to try to put him down drowsy but awake. I started early around 6:30 because I knew it would take a while.

It was awful! He screamed louder than I have ever heard him. As soon as I would do the timed checks, he would immediately stop crying and then start up when I left again. We did it for 45 minutes with checks. I finally just went to get him and rock him to sleep as he continued to make the saddest whimpering noises. Then I cried because I just made him scream for 45 for no reason now (because I stopped early, thus making him go through it for nothing).

My H came home and took over for me. He got him down quickly and we were just discussing what we should for the next night. I went to bed at 9:30 and was surprised that he wasn't up yet but figured I would go to sleep early because I was exhausted.

He didn't wake up until 3 am!!! So he slept from 7:30-3:00. He has never done that. He hasn't even done 2 1/2 hours in the last month. Then he ate because he hadn't eaten since 6:30. After eating I rocked him back to sleep and he slept until 6:30, his normal wake time. It was amazing to see him just happily playing in there until 7, not screaming his head off like he normally does. He was so well rested and happy.

Now I'm conflicted as to what to do. For one, it never really "worked" and I quit BUT I can't help but find a connection with the good sleeping. I mean this boy wakes every hour usually. Maybe I tired the poor guy out with the screaming? It was awful but a part of me realizes I need to get him to self soothe as there is no other reason for the waking....not sure where to go from here.

melly918 · June 2013

Oh, I know it is hard. DD cried for a hour the first night last Sunday. Thursday night she cried 15 minutes and then slept until 6:30am when I needed to wake her to nurse my boulders for boobs. Last night she went down without a fuss and conked out immediately, slept until 7am! She usually wakes between 1 to 3 hours every night so this looks promising. The first few nights are the worst. Hang in there. Be consistent.

orangegoggles · June 2013

melly918:
Oh, I know it is hard. nbsp;DD cried for a hour the first night last Sunday. nbsp;Thursday night she cried 15 minutes and then slept until 6:30am when I needed to wake her to nurse my boulders for boobs. nbsp;Last night she went down without a fuss and conked out immediately, slept until 7am! She usually wakes between 1 to 3 hours every night so this looks promising. The first few nights are the worst. nbsp;Hang in there. Be consistent. nbsp;

That does sound promising! So I guess I should give it a try again tonight....even though I ultimately caved. Also at night when she wakes to eat, what are you doing about putting her down? The same way as the original put down?

MrsRiceARoni · June 2013

I've been reading Ferber as well and started it Thursday night and the biggest problem I see with what you did (except for giving up of course lol) is putting him to bed earlier. Ferber recommends putting your lo to sleep later than normal for the first few days so they are already in their sleep time when you start so they won't fight it as long because they are ready for sleep.

orangegoggles · June 2013

MrsRiceARoni:
I've been reading Ferber as well and started it Thursday night and the biggest problem I see with what you did except for giving up of course lol is putting him to bed earlier. Ferber recommends putting your lo to sleep later than normal for the first few days so they are already in their sleep time when you start so they won't fight it as long because they are ready for sleep.nbsp;

Good point, I blame my exhaustion! Lol

melly918 · June 2013

pangnl79:
melly918:
Oh, I know it is hard. nbsp;DD cried for a hour the first night last Sunday. nbsp;Thursday night she cried 15 minutes and then slept until 6:30am when I needed to wake her to nurse my boulders for boobs. nbsp;Last night she went down without a fuss and conked out immediately, slept until 7am! She usually wakes between 1 to 3 hours every night so this looks promising. The first few nights are the worst. nbsp;Hang in there. Be consistent. nbsp;
That does sound promising! So I guess I should give it a try again tonight....even though I ultimately caved. Also at night when she wakes to eat, what are you doing about putting her down? The same way as the original put down?

when she wakes to eat in the MOTN, 99 percent of the time she falls asleep during nursing. I sometimes wonder if she was even hungry to begin with so as soon as I'm comfortable with how things are going with her going to bed, I will try to wait her out a little longer to see if maybe she is just coming out of one sleep cycle and just needs to fuss a bit before falling back asleep. I am just a little selfish right now because my boobs are just dying to be emptied out by 3 am so if she makes the littlest noise, bam! I'm ready to feed her!

melly918 · June 2013

MrsRiceARoni:
I've been reading Ferber as well and started it Thursday night and the biggest problem I see with what you did (except for giving up of course lol) is putting him to bed earlier. Ferber recommends putting your lo to sleep later than normal for the first few days so they are already in their sleep time when you start so they won't fight it as long because they are ready for sleep.

good point. 6:30 is pretty early. DD goes up between 9 and 10. DH is a SAHD so he likes to sleep in a bit and it works out well for the kids too.

pb&fluff · June 2013

The part that makes me so hesitant to do this even though everyone makes it sound so good! is the crying. DS gets so upset that he's coughing and screaming. If I go in there and just rub his belly or something, he wouldn't calm down at all.

He used to sleep great until he hit 4 months. He is so exhausted from daycare that we put him down at 6:45 or so. We have to start bedtime at like 6:15, or a meltdown occurs. Last night was pretty bad, but usually he sleeps from 6:4512:30, then wakes us at 3:30 or 4. It could be worse, I guess.

orangegoggles · June 2013

pb&fluff:
The part that makes me so hesitant to do this even though everyone makes it sound so good! is the crying. DS gets so upset that he's coughing and screaming. If I go in there and just rub his belly or something, he wouldn't calm down at all. He used to sleep great until he hit 4 months. He is so exhausted from daycare that we put him down at 6:45 or so. We have to start bedtime at like 6:15, or a meltdown occurs. Last night was pretty bad, but usually he sleeps from 6:4512:30, then wakes us at 3:30 or 4. It could be worse, I guess.

Haha yea, thats exactly the problem with it-the crying! Man it is rough. Surprisingly, like you mentioned my son has never been able to calm down if I just went in and rubbed his stomach or head, but he did. I think it was out of desperation, like this will do I guess. So sad but I really want to stick with it because we had another good night with only one wakeup. This is huge for him so I think its working, ya know until a growth spurt or teething, lol.

katigox · June 2013

I'd say aim for a later bedtime, try again, and see what happens. Worst case scenario, you're right back where you started, or best case scenario, it helps (or even works!).

Last night, my DH watched DS, while I tried to catch up on sleep - I had driven for five hours yesterday, helping my Dad move to a new assisted living place - and of course, he slept EIGHT HOURS

I was like, "Come on!". Because on Friday night, I was up four times, and he was up for almost an hour from around one to two. But backtrack to Thursday night, where he slept seven hours (for the first time in four months!), gah, I felt like a new woman! lol. So I do feel like it's turning around.

Something that helped for us, was to give him a big 8 ounce bottle right at MOTN feeding (before, if we tried, he'd fall asleep before he was done, and it leak all over the place). But lately it seems to be helping, because I'm sure he's not feeling as hungry as he was before (but unable to drink enough, before falling asleep).

Either way, hope tonight goes better for you - and update us

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