Working Moms

Short commute or job you really love?

Re: Short commute or job you really love?

  • For me, it wouldn't be that simple. In general, I would go for the job you love. But I have limits on my commute. I don't want to spend half my week in the car. So, what is the commute time for both jobs? How bad is the job you don't love? Are there other benefits to the job you love that would offset the commute - salary, benefits, career advancement, etc?

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  • No I know it's not that simple. I'm struggling with this bc I don't want to spend my time commuting I would rather be with my girls. The difference between the two would be driving 45 min in traffic or taking the train which would be about the same time. I've never had to rely in public transportation though so I'm a little nervous about that. The train job would be a level up which is why I'm leaning towards that. The current job would be fine it's just not exactly what I want to be doing.
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  • jc&catjc&cat member

    imagenjbride0603:
    No I know it's not that simple. I'm struggling with this bc I don't want to spend my time commuting I would rather be with my girls. The difference between the two would be driving 45 min in traffic or taking the train which would be about the same time. I've never had to rely in public transportation though so I'm a little nervous about that. The train job would be a level up which is why I'm leaning towards that. The current job would be fine it's just not exactly what I want to be doing.

    Don't be too hesitant on the train job. Assuming you will be commuting to center city? The train for the most part is more predictable than the drive time since that can be 45 min or a mess. Would you have any potential WFH day(s) with either job to cut down on that commute even 1x per week.

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  • Having a job you love can go a long way - and maybe embracing a 45 minute public transit ride as your "me" time will make it more palatable.  I used to be in a city where I took the subway to work everyday, and I loved that time, at least when I could get a seat, because I found it a relaxing way to start the day.  

    That said, I completely understand spending 1.5 hours round-trip in transit is not desirable at all.  We live in a small in-town condo because we value having as short a commute as possible.  While (hopefully!) that will work for a couple more years - we're expecting our first this summer - we're both very sad about the fact we'll one day likely have much more of a commute when our daughter grows enough to demand more space!

     Is moving to a new neighborhood to shorten the commute to the new job a reasonable possibility?  That'd be the win-win in this scenario. 

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  • shannmshannm member
    So the commute time is the same but you are choosing train vs. car?

    I would totally choose the train and the job that I loved. Assuming that in an emergency, I had a way to get to my kids fast and in that situation, my back up would be a 100 buck cab ride and I'm ok with that.
  • imageshannm:
    So the commute time is the same but you are choosing train vs. car?

    I would totally choose the train and the job that I loved. Assuming that in an emergency, I had a way to get to my kids fast and in that situation, my back up would be a 100 buck cab ride and I'm ok with that.

    This is pretty much where I fall. 

    And while you're concerned about "relying on public transportation" - I think it  would be more reliable/ consistent than traffic.  Bad weather, an accident, etc - you can avoid that w/ a train. 

     

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  • How good are your trains?  I'm in Chicagoland, and almost everyone in the suburbs takes the train in (including myself).  Timewise for me it's a little longer to take the train, but alot cheaper when you include the cost of parking and gas.   I consider the train time "me" time, I check my email on my phone or read a book on my kindle.  If I'm really busy and trying to eek a little more time out of my day, I sometimes will bring papers that I need to read on the train.  Once you get a hang of the train it's not too bad.  Although there is the occasional hiccup, like trains being delayed for weather or once they dropped a crane on the tracks, so all trains were stopped for like 3 hours.  Hope this helps :)
  • PP have some great points, but for me the answer is simple.  I would take a job I love.  Hands down.  I've done both long commutes and jobs I hated, and while the commute can suck while you're in it, hating a job can overtake your life.  Of course, this is just based on my own experiences.  
  • KisstyKissty member

    imageferris0906:
    PP have some great points, but for me the answer is simple.  I would take a job I love.  Hands down.  I've done both long commutes and jobs I hated, and while the commute can suck while you're in it, hating a job can overtake your life.  Of course, this is just based on my own experiences.  

    YesYes 110%  If you love your job your entire day will be better.  45 mins. is not a bad commute.  Not to mention you just get to ride.  I had a job I loathed and it affected my entire life.  By the end I was having panic attacks at night bc I had to go in the next day.  Now I have a job I truly love.  I have an hour to hour and half (depending on traffic) commute and it's not so bad since a) arriving at work is actually a good start to my day and b) knowing when I get home I get to see my "little" man.  Do what you love!

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  • ccamccam member

    imageshannm:
    So the commute time is the same but you are choosing train vs. car? I would totally choose the train and the job that I loved. Assuming that in an emergency, I had a way to get to my kids fast and in that situation, my back up would be a 100 buck cab ride and I'm ok with that.

    I feel the same.  I also know that in an emergency, DH would be more local and available if DS needed him.  I feel like working in a job you love can only make you a happier person.  The commutes would have to be an extreme for me to give up a job I really love.

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  • imageshannm:
    So the commute time is the same but you are choosing train vs. car? I would totally choose the train and the job that I loved. Assuming that in an emergency, I had a way to get to my kids fast and in that situation, my back up would be a 100 buck cab ride and I'm ok with that.

    I agree 100%. I would also make sure that you have several local people listed as emergency contacts for the kids, just in case someone needs to get to them immediately. 

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  • Yes I've had a job I hated and would cry everyday bc it was so stressful it consumed me which I hated so I really want a job I love the office is only 29 miles from my house so I could drive but would avoid sitting in traffic by taking the train.
    Thanks ladies!!! I have a lunch/2nd interview with this company today :
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  • Amelia4Amelia4 member
    Could you potentially do work on the train?  I'd lean towards job I love with those times (but not with a 2 hour commute).  However, I don't get motion sick, and I have a fairly flexible job, so I'd take work home with me to do on the train on the way home and on the way in so I recapture some of my commute. 
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  • QueSrahQueSrah member
    If the commute is 45 min. for car vs. train, you're not really comparing a short commute with a long commute.  It's just different modes of transportation for the same amount of time.  For that I'd switch to a job that I love and take back some "me" time on the train ride.  I always found commuting to be more consistent time-wise than driving is for me now.
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  • imagejc&cat:

    imagenjbride0603:
    No I know it's not that simple. I'm struggling with this bc I don't want to spend my time commuting I would rather be with my girls. The difference between the two would be driving 45 min in traffic or taking the train which would be about the same time. I've never had to rely in public transportation though so I'm a little nervous about that. The train job would be a level up which is why I'm leaning towards that. The current job would be fine it's just not exactly what I want to be doing.

    Don't be too hesitant on the train job. Assuming you will be commuting to center city? The train for the most part is more predictable than the drive time since that can be 45 min or a mess. Would you have any potential WFH day(s) with either job to cut down on that commute even 1x per week.

     I took the R5 Paoli/Thorndale in to Center City for school for years and I can count on 1 hand how many times there was a problem that delayed the train more than 10-15 minutes.

     

  • Pips09Pips09 member

    imageshannm:
    So the commute time is the same but you are choosing train vs. car? I would totally choose the train and the job that I loved. Assuming that in an emergency, I had a way to get to my kids fast and in that situation, my back up would be a 100 buck cab ride and I'm ok with that.

    I agree with this. I miss taking the train to work, I found it to be way less stressful than commuting via car.

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  • esteemesteem member
    Having a job you love will make you a better person for yourself and your girls. YOu will be happoer doing what you love.
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  • Depends on the industry, career and goals overall for me.  Where I am now I cannot advance.  I work from home full time though, and love my team.  The work has become more annoying the more responsibility I have, but I will not change jobs because I like zero commute outside of dropping off the kids.

    In your situation, I would go for the job with the train!

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  • litzo27litzo27 member
    Job I love 100%. Train commute is easy (I did 1 hour+ in NYC for a decade). Driving is worse but you can still manage to make use of that time - news, books on dvd, I got DH a "learn a foreign language" set he likes... Not great but worth a great job.
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  • My previous job was an hour commute each way.  I loved the job, but it just ruined my quality of life to commute so far. 

    I now have both, a short commute to a job I love.  I vote for looking for both, but staying at the job you love in the meantime. 

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  • It depends on a lot of factors, but anything more than 75 minutes is an absolute no. 

    I had a friend remind me that an hour commute each way comes out to an extra 40 hours per month. It's like working an extra WEEK every month, for free. I'd have to really love my job to be willing to put in an extra 12 weeks every year.

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