My friend had a baby shower a few weeks ago. She hosted my shower with my stepmom about a year ago so I wanted to be actively involved in hers. Her mom was SO excited to be a first time grandmother so kind of took a very active role. Her mom basically booked the hall (VFW), sent the invites, etc. and arranged for it to be a potluck kinda event (tacky I know, NOT my idea).
Well I did a lot for it too. I brought the cake, favors, sodas, 2 dishes, chips, all plates, cups, napkins, etc. I also bought her a swing and TONs of presents. I also made a diaper cake. I also bought TONS of decorations, but it was already decorated when I got there as her mom got there literally 4 hours early and I didn't have that luxury with a 11 month old. I think my total spend was about $600- $700 on everything (the cake alone was $150). This was a shower for 40 people so you needed a LOT of food and everything.
Well she seemed to have a nice time, but I didn't ever receive a "thank you" text or anything like that. We have been friends for a longtime, but have the kind of friendship where we can go long periods of time without talking. I just feel kinda hurt that I did so much (with a young baby too) and didn't really hear thanks or anything. I was very grateful for everything she did for mine and sent her a $100 giftcard to a spa. I definitely don't expect anything like that, but a thank you text would have been nice. Am I just being oversensitive here? Maybe she didn't realize everything I did for the shower and just assumed her mom did everything?
Re: Friend/Baby Shower Vent.....
Her mom and I went back and forth on shower planning on FB for months. The invitation didn't have a "Hosted by" section but said "RSVPs to be sent to" and listed her mom. I guess I just assumed we were both hosting it. Her mom was really excited and had a clearcut idea of what she wanted to do (I didn't really like the venue, decision to have potluck, etc.) and I didn't want to step on her toes, but I made it pretty clear (I thought) that I wanted a big part in it.
I don't recall that she even said thank you at the shower. I don't expect a hostess gift as I know they are on a budget, but just thought it was weird it went pretty much unacknowledged. No thank you card received yet, but I would think this would be kinda impersonal anyways for everything I did....
At the same time, cohosting the shower was your gift to her. Obviously a thank you is in order, but giving a gift back is not always what happens.