Vent-Just looking for a little support and advice.

Heather2884 · May 2013

I'm having a bad few days. I've had a little set back with my ppd. I was doing great, but then I got a letter yesterday saying I have been selected for jury duty between July-September. Total panic! I stay home with my daughter, my husband will be gone part of the time for Army training and family lives in other states. There is no way I am leaving her. Anyway, it set me back into total anxiety just thinking about being forced to explain to a judge why I need to be excused from this term. For me part of the ppd has been that I only have a small group of people I will leave her with and I am not willing to leave her with anyone outside of that group. I'm stressed at the unknown of how this works and what they will do to me when I bring her with me. The sad part, I was really doing extremely well and had just recently felt so much better, and then this. Does anyone know how this works? I get very nervous in situations I am not familiar with.

On top of that, my SIL is pregnant with her 3rd child. I am very happy for them and I know they wanted it so bad, but I am OAD not by choice. For whatever reason, it made me feel a little sad for us that we don't have that option. I would never want to go through what I went through again. It was a living nightmare. Most of that side of the family does not acknowledge that I and dd were in serious danger during the pregnancy. It is like they think I am just made it up. Apparently, weekly appts starting at 7 weeks, 13 ultrasounds, a scheduled c-section, and 8 months of partial to full bed rest are not obvious problems. So, there is a big of a disconnect for me now. I am trying to let that one go, but sometimes the hurt still creeps in.

On a good note, I got my Charlie Banana cloth diapers and so far I love it! She looks so much more comfortable. It has been an easy transition and the clean up really hasn't been bad. Thank you to all who gave me advice on cloth diapering!

I just needed and outlet. My best friend has had several recent losses and the other is facing infertility. Obviously, I am sensitive to their hearts and don't want to call them and talk about my minor issues. Please be kind. I am grateful for what I have, just a little sad and anxious.

jjt616 · May 2013

Also about the jury duty. Are you bf? If you are you can be excused if you are bf your child up until they are a year old. My SIL just went through this a month ago when my nephew was three months old.

I am sorry about your ppd creeping back in. I didn't have it but I have struggled with anxiety and depression. You may want to talk with your dr if it doesn't get better.

Wish you the best

Heather2884 · May 2013

Yes, adopting is an option we are open to exploring. DD is only 8 months, so we aren't ready financially to look into it. Most days and I happy with only DD, but every now and then the desire to adopt is there. I'm not sure what I really want yet. DH is open to the idea.

JCM · May 2013

Just like the pp's have said I believe most states will excuse your from Jury Duty if you are the primary caregiver of a minor. In TX it's up until the age of 15. All I had to do was go online and tick a box and that was it. Easy, so maybe you should look into that now so it can clear your mind.

As a fellow mom that had PPD/PPA up until about 6 months ago I feel your pain. While my DH isn't in the military he does travel a ton for work so I know how hard it is to be with a LO without help and in and day out. I'm sorry your PPD/PPA is starting to act up again. If things don't get better in a few days then I would talk to your doc. Your body can get used to some of the meds so you may need an increased dose or a change all together. GL!

apansey87 · May 2013

I too have had PPD/A issues which started during 3rd tri. Theyve gotten significantly better, but there are still days I wake up and I can just tell it's a down day. I also get easily overwhelmed by what others would view as a minor issue or easy fix. I also dwell on something until it is 100 resolved so I know how that is too.

We are also going to be OAD. It wasnt what I thought I would do, and I am still sad, angry, bitter etc. So I feel you there too.

I hope things get better soon!

bumpuser8448316 · May 2013

First of all, holy cow your JD is 3 months long?! How the hell can anyone plan for that, SAHM or not?

I suffered from some bad PPD/PPA so I know how debilitating it can be. I'm so sorry you are struggling. I really encourage you to gomoutnin the community and make friends that you can grow to know and trust. Even if you never leave your LO with them, it's so important to have a support system in place.

WinsyWade · May 2013

scatteredtrees:
re: jury duty
I don't know if it's like this in all states, but in Missouri I just had to write on the summons that I was unavailable as the primary caregiver to a minor child. No judge.

Yes! You can call into to get waived. I was summoned when my DD was a baby and still nursing. I called, the woman told me to write a letter and they would give me an extension. I got the extension and I have not been called up since.

littlemermaid · May 2013

You could have your doctor write a note stating that you are being treated for PPD and then send it in with your summons.

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