Cat worries

rachelmredig@yahoo.com · April 2013

Hello Mommies! I am currently in a tough spot. My husband has had his 2 cats for 10 years now. I did not grow up with any animals in our house so I was not used to the hair and a litter box and all of the things that come with living with cats. One of them sheds so much that I literally have to vacuum daily and I have all of our furniture covered because there is so much hair. We keep our bedroom door closed and have since we moved in, so I basically live in our bedroom. Now that we have a baby on the way, I am growing more and more uncomfortable about these cats being around with all of the hair. He talked about finding another home for them but it is very hard since he has had them for so long. I don't want to be the bad wife and demand they leave, but I don't know what to do. I don't want hair all over my house with a baby in it. I worry about keeping everything clean since they climb on the kitchen countertops and stove. I worry about them jumping in the crib. I can just close the door to the baby's room, but I just get exhausted thinking about how much cleaning I'll have to do to combat the hair and countertops. This is an ongoing battle in our house. Every time the cats are brought up it is an argument and I don't know what to do about it!

ellewoodsSC · April 2013

Really you are overthinking it and clearly trying to find every excuse in the book to get rid of the cats. Pets shouldn't be treated as disposable objects once they becomes inconvenient for you or you have a baby on the way. Most cats and babies (and cat fur) can coexist peacefully and in fact early exposure to cat and cat hair has been shown to reduce the incidence of asthma and cat allergies in children. Most cats will want nothing to do with a crying, flailing baby so don't worry about the wives tales of cats smothering the child. I have a cat and he wanted nothing to do with my baby and now he tolerates all sorts of attention from her that she is a toddler.

What is your housing situation? Instead of isolating your bedroom as a cat-free zone, can you reduce their roaming area to a few rooms or part of the house? They can spend some time outside? Can you get a roomba for your pet hair concerns? Can you train them to stay off the counters and certain furniture?

rachelmredig@yahoo.com · April 2013

I actually really do not want to have to get rid of them because I know it would only create resentment from my husband. We live in a 2 bedroom condo and there is not a lot of choice as to limiting the rooms they can and can not be in, and there is not a way to keep them outside. There are things he could do to help with the hair like have them groomed regularly or even brush them daily, but his schedule is hectic and it doesn't happen. I have allergies to cats so that is where most of my issues come from. I just can't stand the hair that piles up all over the house and floats through the air and knowing that they climb on counters. I'm sure they could be trained but that would mean he would have to take the time to do it.

And I am not trying to assume they are disposable objects by any means. They are my husbands cats and I keep my distance because of my allergies. I am not used to living with pets in general so it has been a transition for me.

Marinowski · April 2013

I lived with cats and dogs most of my life and so did all of my siblings. All of us are fine. Also took care of a lot of babies with pets. Babies should be exposed to a little dirt, it keeps them healthy. As long as they aren't eating handfuls of fur and cat litter, they will be fine. If you are worried about countertops, spray the cat with water when you see it up there, they will learn not to. Cats will probably ignore the crib with the baby in it or just close the door. As far as the allergies part goes you have a point, maybe you could ask your husband to please step up and groom them or pay to have them groomed regularly. But for the most part you agreed to keep the cats as a couple (he had the cats when you married him) and now you need to figure out a way to make it work, not rehome them because they are inconvenient

AimeeL85 · April 2013

We have 2 long-haired cats and it's never been a problem keeping the place clean. Some regular vacuuming and sweeping should really be enough. Cat hair won't hurt your child and you'll have bigger messes to worry about once they're here.

I don't like my cats either, but they'll be dead someday and I won't get more...and yours are older than mine.

snuggle+monkey · April 2013

Since they're your husband's cats and you do everything to clean up after them, I don't think it's too much to ask that he brush them regulary. Maybe not daily, but at least every few days to cut down on some of the shedding.

We have three cats, and I just plan to keep the nursery door shut. There's only one who is sneaky that I'll have to watch out for. We don't have that much cat hair accumulation- one sheds a little worse, but she also needs to be brushed more often (my fault). I do think increased brushing, at least to the worst offender, will help you.

mmdd20 · April 2013

We have two rescue cats that I am not particularly fond of, but they are a big part of our family (and I do love them most of the time ;-). We simply keep our bedroom door shut and the nursery door shut. Eliminates any issues with hair in the bedrooms. As for the rest of the house, DH and I take turns running the vacuum and doing a quick sweep daily. I use Clorox wipes on the counter and stove tops every morning and evening and we use the hand attachment on the vacuum for the sofa. I would say our cleaning routine takes no more than 20 mins a day, which even with a newborn, was easily managable.

MouseInLux · May 2013

Get a spray gun and squirt them with water when they jump on the counters.
Car hair has very little to do with allergies, it's cat dander that causes allergies.

raefre · May 2013

We have two long-haired cats and a GSD--all of which shed profusely; however, with the amount of cat hair my child probably inadvertently consumes, I have yet to see DS cough up a hairball.

On a serious note: we limit our two cats to the main areas of the house while everything else is off limits (mostly bedrooms/bathrooms). I think DH vacuums once or twice a week to keep everything manageable. We also groom our cats and dog frequently to keep the shedding minimal.

Suzanne68 · May 2013

I have a long haired cat. I comb him with a steal comb every other day and vacuum/mop 2x a week. Maybe you can have the cats groomed. I do in summer months, he gets a buzz cut every few months. The baby won't care and sometimes my baby ends up with it in her mouth from paci. It actually will reduce chance of allergies to be exposed so early. Also, my cat hates people. Hisses at anyone but us. He loves and is super overprotective of my daughter. Now that she is 11 months she loves him and they play together. Just trim cats nails weekly.

wifeyvana · May 2013

You are going to have a really tough time re-homing 10 year old cats. We have 2 cats (1 long hair) and it really wasn't such a huge transition. Like you, they were my husband's before I "adopted" them. Now I couldn't imagine life without our furbabies.

We keep the door closed to the room baby is sleeping in and we plan on getting the long haired cat completely shaved before baby #2 arrives to cut down on the amount of cleaning I have to do....that's the extent of the "transition". 1 cat stays away from LO and the other cat can't get enough of him (and is way more patient than I am lol).

I read an article awhile back about how research showed that people who lived with animals and were exposed to animal dandruff from an early age actually had LESS allergies throughout life.

wifeyvana · May 2013

snuggle+monkey:
Since they're your husband's cats and you do everything to clean up after them, I don't think it's too much to ask that he brush them regulary. Maybe not daily, but at least every few days to cut down on some of the shedding.

Ditto this. As I mentioned before, our 2 cats were my DH's before I married him. I've never once had to change a litter box and we've lived together for 7 years ;-)

rachelmredig@yahoo.com · May 2013

My husband and I sat down to discuss this whole topic. I explained my concerns and that if he pitched in to help with the cleaning and upkeep that it would help me a lot and i wouldn't have so many concerns. That is my biggest opposition. I don't want to have to be taking care of a newborn baby and cleaning the entire house on a daily basis. I understand hair won't affect the baby, but it does affect me. I can not stand to be in the part of the house where the cats are for too long or I sneeze constantly and my eyes get itchy, red, and puffy. I take Claritin every day. I get allergies this time of year anyway and the hair only makes it worse.

He has decided that finding them another home would be the best option because he doesn't want to do the cleaning either.

It may be seen as an excuse, but its not. I am tired of only living in one room of my house and if he is not willing to help with the maintenance, they need a home where someone will be.

wifeyvana · May 2013

msspeedymarie:
It is really unfortunate that your husband claims to love his cats enough to force you to put up with them despite your allergies, but can't be bothered to clean up after them in order to a) make you more comfortable in your own home and b) keep them.
This is exactly why so many private animal shelters are so strict about who can adopt cats.
I hope your husband understands that re-homing them himself will be incredibly difficult, and that if they are taken to an ASPCA shelter, they will likely be put down, and if they are taken to a private shelter, it is highly unlikely they will be adopted and will live out their lives in a crowded shelter wondering what the hell happened.
I adopted a 10 year old cat from a shelter who was taken there after his owner died. I'm pretty sure I'm in the minority, as there were a lot of middle-aged cats that has been there months or years, but the kittens go so fast that shelters don't even bother featuring the kittens on their websites.

I volunteered for a private cat shelter and the older cats rarely got adopted. Cats are extremely difficult to re-home. That's unfortunate that your husband doesn't want to help care for them and would rather put them in a shelter or to sleep.

Temp53431437508241 · May 2013

What about an automatic vacuum like a Roomba? It can run every day to keep the hair under control. If he can't be bothered to take a little time out to clean up after the cats that cause you discomfort, wth is he going to do to help with the baby?

Sorry you are going through this, and I hope you can find a compromise. Like others have said, trying to rehome senior cats can be nearly impossible.

artistgal · May 2013

First off, shame on your husband for not taking care of his own cats.

We have two cats, and while I LOVE them I can understand how they can be difficult. Hairballs, shedding, litterboxes--it does add up to more cleaning.

I do want to note for anyone else reading this thread that might be concerned about cat cleanliness though that it is not something to worry about too extensively (esp if you have entirely indoor cats who will not bring in germs from outdoors) Studies have show that exposure to pets can actually reduce allergies in children.

https://www.webmd.com/allergies/news/20110613/pets-may-reduce-childrens-allergy-risk

The aspca has a good guide on to how to deal with a baby / cat combo before baby comes home and after.

https://www.aspca.org/pet-care/cat-care/cats-and-babies.aspx

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