Community› The Bump Message Boards› Babies on the Brain
Babies on the Brain
New Discussion
Options

Nervous Gals Unite!

Venus201Venus201
in Babies on the Brain

Hey guys! 

My husband and I are entertaining the idea of having a child. I never thought I'd see the day. I'm 31 and my husband is 34. We were happy with our careers and didn't think we'd ever feel the pull to become parents. But now I can't stop thinking about a soft baby in my arms. Our lives are fantastic the way they are, but could we be missing out on something brilliant? I went from shying away from children, to adoring my friends' little ones. My question is: who else out there feels the same way? I know many people on this site are positive they want to be parents. But there must be someone out there like me trying to make this beautiful decision, so close to diving in but maybe wanting a fellow first timer to brave this new journey with. Is anyone else teetering on the edge of parenthood? If so, want to go this together? Share concerns, freak out, take the plunge, holds hands along the way? :)

 

- V  

Report Reply to Post

Re: Nervous Gals Unite!

  • Options
    BebuhBebuh
    I know the feeling. I never wanted kids, didn't want anything to do with them, could list a million reasons why having a baby was a horrible idea. And then one day those feelings changed. Not a full 180, but its like the door was cracked open just a bit and I was peeking out to see what it might be like. As time went on, that door just kept creeping farther open, and now it is firmly propped open and I have strode confidently out into the unknown. Am I a little terrified to change my current lifestyle? Of course! But I am way more excited about the future and becoming a mother. From my own experience, I can say that those fears will give way to excitement, so if you're still on the fence, just give it a little more time. Either way, good luck to you!
    Report Reply
  • Options
    Venus201Venus201

    Ahhh! That is EXACTLY how I feel. Before, I would preach to my husband how badly a baby would ruin our life. Now, that door is just crack, crackin' away. Ha! And you're so right; every few weeks, the door opens wider and I get braver / more curious about peeking out. I think I finally have a foot out the door: I got off BC (still using a back up), and am on prenatals, but taking that last leap is SO scary! How did you do it? 

    - V  

    Report Reply
  • Loading the player...
  • Options
    BebuhBebuh
    I'm actually still on BCP, because my DH and I are using this year to cross things off our baby bucket list. (Travel, finances, home repairs, etc.) I'm taking prenatals, eating healthy, and working out to get my body in the best shape that I can before I get KU, so that I can continue working out during pregnancy and just be healthy overall. I've also been doing a lot of research on everything pregnancy/baby related (Charting/temping, symptoms, body changes, birth experiences, etc) so I can be as prepared as possible when the time comes. I'm hoping to go off BCP by October of this year, so I'm hoping the next 6 months go by fast! I cant wait to start trying!
    Report Reply
  • Options
    Venus201Venus201
    Baby bucket list! I need to make one of those. I'm also trying to get in shape and eat right. I've been eating whole, organic foods and am trying to lose some weight so the pregnancy goes smoother. The 'thought' is to stop using BC around June, but man, I'm still a'scared. :D
    Report Reply
  • Options
    BebuhBebuh

    Well as the ladies on these boards have all said, the odds of getting pregnant are only about 20% each month, and it can take a healthy couple up to a year, so I wouldn't stress about it too much. Probably my favorite baby book so far has been "Do Chocolate Lover's Have Sweeter Babies?" by Jena pincott. It was not only a very entertaining read, but it delved into much more biological topics than the standard "What to Expect" books usually do. 

    Oh, and one item on my bucket list is to go ride all the roller coasters I can with my BFF and I am soooo excited about it! Fun items make the wait less of a struggle. 

    Report Reply
  • Options
    Crystallene76Crystallene76 member
    I felt exactly the same way. I became more and more sure in the last couple years. We took that time to prepare financially and take better care of myself. We recently made the big decision to try and see what happens. It's exciting scary all at the same time. I think it's important that we're all taking this decision so seriously. It's a huge decision.
    Report Reply
  • Options
    Venus201Venus201
    SO true! My mom is like, "Just stop trying NOT to get preggo and see what happens." But then my BFF is like, "No, as soon as you get off BC, expect it to happen that month, because it did to me and I wasn't totally ready." Shesh. Ha! 
    Report Reply
  • Options
    Venus201Venus201

    imageCrystallene76:
    I felt exactly the same way. I became more and more sure in the last couple years. We took that time to prepare financially and take better care of myself. We recently made the big decision to try and see what happens. It's exciting scary all at the same time. I think it's important that we're all taking this decision so seriously. It's a huge decision.

     

    Hey! That's what we've been doing. The last year we've been stocking money away and doing things to the house, etc. But man, taking that final step and actually trying scares me. I'm 31, yet I keep thinking, "But I want to do this and this and this." I think I've had too many moms telling me that "Your life is over once you have a kid." That can't be totally true, can it? *sigh* 

    Report Reply
  • Options
    Crystallene76Crystallene76 member
    Well from what I understand everyone has a different parenting experience. My friends have told me that everything changes but for the better. Having a child, just adds to your life. It is important to make the decision that is best for your and your spouse. It's a huge decision and must be taken seriously. It was a tough decision for me and my husband too but I'm excited a lil scared about what the future holds but mostly excited ready or at least as ready as I can be. Best of luck to you in your huge decision.
    Report Reply
  • Options
    FutureMrsSarahSFutureMrsSarahS
    Totally with you!  I'm 31, my husband and I had a serious talk about me going off bc in the next 6 months and I'm scared/excited/nervous.  Especially now that I'm perusing this site and realizing I don't know any of the lingo and there are people way more prepared than I am.  We know we want kids, we're just not sure how to make the plunge because we're both over-thinkers.
    Report Reply
  • Options
    Venus201Venus201
    This! Ha! I'm such an over-thinker, so we set a deadline to make a decision. And it's this year. Eep! 
    Report Reply
  • Options
    salt78salt78 member

    I never thought I would have children before I met/married my husband. I didn't decide I definitely wanted one until I was 32.

    Now I'm 35 and my daughter is almost 15 months old. I am still happy in my career. You don't need to throw away your old life when you have a baby. I am still very much the way I was before, only better because now I get to be her mom too. 

    AlternaTickers - Cool, free Web tickers
    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"