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Soothing to have hand in my shirt

btj357btj357 member
in Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months
Lately my 18 month daughter has had more anxiety around unfamiliar faces. I understand this is normal however she soothes herself by putting her hand down my shirt and into my bra. I'm not sure where this is coming from as it just started last month. I understand this is her way of coping but I'm not sure if she is at the age to start saying no and teach her that its not appropriate?

I don't think anything of it because I'm used to it however her dad is very strange about it and yells at her because she does it in public and people stare.

Can anyone help me out on this? I'm not sure what direction to go about with it.

Thanks.
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Re: Soothing to have hand in my shirt

  • nemosucksIInemosucksII member
    So funny!  My DD has been doing this since a baby.  She started while she was nursing and now she is 3 1/2 years old and still does it!  She is obsessed with my bra and what color it is etc.!
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  • btj357btj357 member
    good to hear that someone else has it done to them and find it funny! haha i just wasn't too sure about how to go about it! she is the same way! i think its funny but he freaks out saying how inappropriate it is. Thanks!
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  • nemosucksIInemosucksII member
    I have to swat DD's hand away half the time.  At night when I read my DD books, I allow her to do it since she is so comforted by it!  Hoping it will pass soon!
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  • oliversmommy32912oliversmommy32912 member
    My son does this all the time. We just joke that he's a boob man. Lol. I let him when we are at home but when we are in a crowd I gently tell him" no no, that's mommy's space right now, please don't touch" and distract him. He isn't pushy about it though. I don't think it's a comfort thing for him, I think he just thinks it's a nice warm spot to rest his hands. I don't know how I would feel if he needed it. I think I might still insist that it's something we only do at home because personal boundaries are important and there are a lot of things that are okay to do at home but not in public.
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  • CindyRelluhCindyRelluh member
    Dd does this too! She will pull my shirt and look down it in public. Last night she got into my drawer and put my bra on her head! Little weirdos, haha!
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  • mlee116mlee116 member

    My DS does the same thing.  It's just a comfort thing.  In public, I distract him but at home I let him do it.  It's just his way of trying snuggle and I'm sure it feels warm and cozy to him.  If I wear a shirt with a higher collar (like a crew neck) it kind of prevents it, so maybe try that?

    I agree that your DH needs to chill.  How is she supposed to understand that it's inappropriate? 

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  • mben1119mben1119 member

    Your LO's dad needs to chill out. This is really normal. DS doesn't do it too often anymore, but when he's sick or really tired, he does. You can gently tell her no and redirect her, without yelling at her and making her feel bad about it.

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  • WipzWipz member
    Just tell your DH if he is feeling uncomfortable in public he can grab the other boob and maybe he'll feel better. Wink

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  • PhoebeJones3PhoebeJones3 member

    imageWipz:
    Just tell your DH if he is feeling uncomfortable in public he can grab the other boob and maybe he'll feel better. Wink

     

    Hah! I'd completely say this to my DH if he got on to our son for some comfort boob feeling.

     

     I feel like I'm the only one who doesn't care if my DS does it in public. Its my boob and its my kid. I suppose if it gets to the point where he is lifting up my shirt and demanding a feel, then I might feel differently, but he seems to do it without much thought.  

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  • tonychelletonychelle member
    This is us too! I barely even breast fed so I don't think it was from that or anything, but she does it all the time -- I always have to watch it in public because somebody else might see something. haha
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  • Starlight811Starlight811 member
    haha my LO does it still, was off BF at 6 months, and shes 22 months! She only does it in public when she gets nervous around alot of people or shy. She then will try and get the whole arm down my shirt and i have to grab her arm and move away otherwise my shirt would be all open its so embarassing when she does it so quick im sure my bra is exposed sometimes!
    Me 28 DH 33 | DX: DOR | HSG: Normal | IUI#1: (Clomid/HCG/Progesterone) BFN | IUI#2: (Clomid/HCG/Progesterone) BFN | IUI#3: (Clomid/HCG/Progesterone) BFN | IUI#4: (Menopur/HCG/Progesterone) BFN | IUI#5: (Menopur/Gonal-F/HCG/Progesterone) BETA 7/2
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