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Pedi Issues?

Rachel SonnierRachel Sonnier member
in Special Needs
Anyone else have a little one who is scared to death of their ped? The exams always end with her holding him down, or having me hold him down, while he cries and struggles to get free. I can tell that he is very frightened and he has sensory issues, which only exacerbate all of this. As a new mom, I guess I just thought that that's how it was done, but I don't know how comfortable I am with this technique anymore. We see lots of other pediatric professionals who examine him, and no one else has to hold him down and do it against his will. To complicate matters even further, our ped is my MILs best friend. I guess that's why I let it go on this long. Should I switch, or is this pretty standard practice for pedis?
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Re: Pedi Issues?

  • finsupfinsup member

    I wouldn't say its standard practice in my experience, I mean sometimes kids will need to be restrained to get something unpleasant done, hell I'd like to be restrained to get a throat culture, but for a simple exam?  I give a side eye to that.

    A good pedi should have plenty of tricks up their sleeve to get kids to cooperate - its especially odd that he cooperates for other providers but not her.   In your shoes I would probably explore another doctor to see how he does. 

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  • Rachel SonnierRachel Sonnier member
    Auntie, He actually does surprisingly well at the dentist and Ped GI, which I find are way more invasive exams. They both have a great bedside manner, seem to be very kid oriented, offer distractions and wait until he's ready to open his mouth, or lay back on his own.
    The ped, on the other hand, is a really sweet lady, but if he seems nervous, backs away or tries to cover his face/ears when she is doing the exam, she immediately has me hold him down, instead of trying to make him feel more comfortable.
    I guess my concern with the situation is that instead of giving him a little space to acclimate to the situation, or the feeling, she forces it on him. I'm not talking shots, or anything life or death, just basic well checks, and ears/nose/mouth/heart when he's sick. Last year at his well check, she basically gave up, and didn't even finish the exam. We have seen both of her partners without issue.
    I get what you are saying about overcoming the fear, and I think that's a really valid point and something to think about. It just really bothers me that getting it done quickly, or not at all, seems to be more important than making him feel more comfortable. Does that make any sense?
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  • funchickenfunchicken member

    imageRachel Sonnier:
    Auntie, He actually does surprisingly well at the dentist and Ped GI, which I find are way more invasive exams. They both have a great bedside manner, seem to be very kid oriented, offer distractions and wait until he's ready to open his mouth, or lay back on his own. The ped, on the other hand, is a really sweet lady, but if he seems nervous, backs away or tries to cover his face/ears when she is doing the exam, she immediately has me hold him down, instead of trying to make him feel more comfortable. I guess my concern with the situation is that instead of giving him a little space to acclimate to the situation, or the feeling, she forces it on him. I'm not talking shots, or anything life or death, just basic well checks, and ears/nose/mouth/heart when he's sick. Last year at his well check, she basically gave up, and didn't even finish the exam. We have seen both of her partners without issue. I get what you are saying about overcoming the fear, and I think that's a really valid point and something to think about. It just really bothers me that getting it done quickly, or not at all, seems to be more important than making him feel more comfortable. Does that make any sense?

    Given this additional info, I think I'd switch.  My DD has sensory issues, too.  I switched allergists because our old allergist had the bedside manner of a robot, and I wanted DD to be able to sit in the exam chair and have the doctor check her without my intervening.  If the doctor can't coax him into letting her check basic things, then I think she's not a good fit.  DD hates the sensation of getting her ears checked, but she tolerates it because she knows the doctor isn't going to hurt her, and that just took some extra patience on the part of her pedi.

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  • aiche Umm Ayoubaiche Umm Ayoub member

    I would find a doctor who was willing to work with you and not frighten your son .

    My daughter has SPD and behavior issues  as well as a mood disorder she has a whole team of doctors and they wait until she's comfortable and try not to force her to do things , somethings just can't be helped like drawing blood it takes 3 people to do it, she will let the doctors look in her ears and throat but it took her a while to warm up and accept that it's part of the doctors visits 

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