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So frustrated - 4 days late & BFN...

*sparky**sparky* member
in TTC after 35

I am 41 and DH and I started TTC in November.  We had a BFP in January and I M/C early, so we started TTC again.  Since the M/C I really have not been that into it and have not been charting, temping, etc. like I was before.  Truth be told, I am afraid of being excited and let down again. 

So last month I don't think we even TTC at the right time (I think we were too early) and I was not expecting to be PG.  But now AF is 4 days late so I started getting optimistic.  I bought a PG test on my way into work and tested when I got here - BFN.  :-(

AF has never, ever been late for me - I am always right on time or even early.  So I don't know WTF is going on - just getting old and my system is getting out of whack I guess.  This is so frustrating!

 

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Re: So frustrated - 4 days late & BFN...

  • Jacque SillsJacque Sills member

    Hi Sparky,

    I am so sorry for your loss.  I know how painful they are to go through.  And, the apprehension you feel afterwards while TTC...I think this might be why you are a bit out of whack with your cycle timing.  This emotional stress can be very tuff on your mind and body....

    Try to allow yourself to get through this and heal.  TTC can start to feel like a job, but remember.....you are the boss and you set the schedules, so if you need more time to heal.  Allow for that to happen.  Or, breaks...once in a while.  Just do it.  Think of what make you relax and feel comfortable and do that to help you get your cycle back on track, maybe, a hot bath or a nice long walk or doing some meditative belly rubs to help the blood flow.  whatever works for you and just know that it will be ok.  I know it is easier said, than done....but remember, you are resilient.  :)

    Best in luck and take care.....

    Oh, and don't blame it on your age...remember, you just went through a very emotionally tuff experience of your loss....you body is just trying to re-cooperate.  Yes, I realize that you are a bit older, like me, but just don't be so hard on yourself.....(((Hugs)))

    Lilypie Trying to Conceive 15 to 80 day cycle tickers
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  • *sparky**sparky* member
    Thank you Jacque.  I really appreciate your kind words. 

     

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  • hooligans4hooligans4 member

     i am so sorry for your loss.

    give it another week and test again.  after a M/C your cycle can be off for a while.  i know mine is.  your hormones can take a while to get back to normal and also the stress from your loss could also be the cause. 

    good luck with your journey

      Me:39, DH:40

    DD born 8/96, DS born 8/04

    TTC#3

    NTNP since 2006, active trying 1/13

    Natural M/C 3/13 at 7 weeks

    CP 2/14

    Daisypath Anniversary tickers

             imageimage

    All welcome

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  • gscovillegscoville member
    image*sparky*:

    I am 41 and DH and I started TTC in November.  We had a BFP in January and I M/C early, so we started TTC again.  Since the M/C I really have not been that into it and have not been charting, temping, etc. like I was before.  Truth be told, I am afraid of being excited and let down again. 

    So last month I don't think we even TTC at the right time (I think we were too early) and I was not expecting to be PG.  But now AF is 4 days late so I started getting optimistic.  I bought a PG test on my way into work and tested when I got here - BFN.  :-(

    AF has never, ever been late for me - I am always right on time or even early.  So I don't know WTF is going on - just getting old and my system is getting out of whack I guess.  This is so frustrating!

    I'm sorry for your loss.

    Please keep in mind (for your own sanity's sake) that cycles can be pretty wonky after a loss.  I had a loss in January and my cycles are still over the place.  My first one after my loss was 43 days long, and I typically have 21-23 day cycles, so imagine the crazy going on there being weeks late.  And I was charting too, FF gave me crosshairs at CD17 that it never took away, even though I likely didn't ovulate then as my LP couldn't have been 26 days long.  But I told myself over and over it was just my body adjusting to the hormone roller coaster that is pg and loss, it helps some to keep that in perspective. 


         

    imageimage

    Married August 2012. Me: 41  DH: 42 
    Daughter from previous marriage: 20

    BFP 12/19/12: Ectopic discovered at 8 weeks, right tube removed 01/18/13
    June 2013 Testing Results: Progesterone: 31.7, LH: 5, FSH: 5, Estradiol: 161
    Clomid cycles Nov. 2013 and Jan, Feb, and March 2014

    TTC journey over as of the end of October 2014

    TTCAL BLOG

    All ALers welcome!

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  • cdb2013cdb2013 member
    I'm so sorry that is very frustrating!  The ladies on here are terrific and all give great advice. It's comforting to see others in our age bracket going through similar situations.. 
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  • posqueenposqueen
    I am.sorry for what u went.through. I miss carried twins feb 1st 2013. Three days previous I was told heart beats look good : I am and have always been on 24 day cycle and now 4days late...bfn monday and today. So confused. Best wishes to u.
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  • *sparky**sparky* member

    imageposqueen:
    I am.sorry for what u went.through. I miss carried twins feb 1st 2013. Three days previous I was told heart beats look good : I am and have always been on 24 day cycle and now 4days late...bfn monday and today. So confused. Best wishes to u.

    posqueen - I am so sorry.  This such a rough process to go through.

     

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