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October 2011 Moms
Julz629
member
Still not talking?
Julz629
member
I was wondering who out there had kids that still aren't talking? DS only has a few actual words (dada, doggy, no), although there are "words" that he consistently says (here, yes, what) although they sound nothing like the actual words.
He shows the other signs of communication -- pointing & grunting, following simply directions, non-verbal communication (pointing, waving, clapping, indicating to be picked up, etc.), and can identify objects by pointing when we ask him where something is.
He has become increasingly impatient when we don't know what he wants -- we have to carry him around while he points to whatever he is trying to tell us. Yet he wants to learn everything -- he will learn an object after a few times of us repeating it and will remember it days later.
Our pedi didn't seem overly concerned at the 18 month appointment because he was doing all these other things. But I am starting to second guess myself and I have reached out to our school district, county resources, and Early On to see if there is something else I should be doing with him.
For those of you with non-talkers, what are you doing, if anything?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Still not talking?
Oh, and I have been trying to update my signature for DAYS -- how the heck do I get it to actually save?!?
DS is almost 19 months old.
Well, I think I can help you with the siggy. I had to remove everything from mine and save it blank. Then put everything back in and save it. I hope that helps.
As far as the talking goes, you put it on Pedi's radar and he isn't concerned, so I wouldn't worry too much. I would imagine this is the type of thing that just takes some kids longer.
Burned by the Bear
Thanks! Got it!
Thanks for your insight -- this sounds similar to DS. I have contacted Early On (our state's EI program) and they have issued a referral. It should take 2-3 weeks for them to contact me so at least I've got the ball rolling on this.
This! Exactly.
I'm sorry, but this really made me laugh. Make sure to write that one in the baby book.
My DS only has one consistent word (dada) there are maybe two others that we think he has said, but its been months since he's said them. He follows basic directions, understands most words, and points to what he wants. He can wave and clap, but rarely does. He doesn't make any animal sounds or point to an object or picture in a book if we ask him to.
When we had his 18 month appt the pedi wasn't overly concerned, but did say that DS was on the very low side of normal and that it was worth getting him checked out. He said it would be fine to wait until he was two if we weren't ready, but the evaluation is free so we may as well go ahead if we wanted. He also said that if there is a legitimate delay then it could only help DS to get the help he needs sooner rather than later. I agreed that I didn't want to wait 6 more months in case there is an issue. We have his EI evaluation coming up on Thursday.
I know this thread is about whether or not to pursue speech therapy, but I wanted to throw our EI experience out there in case it helps. DS had a gross motor delay (he didn't crawl until the day after his first birthday) and when we mentioned it to the pedi she also suggested calling Early Intervention to schedule an observation/assessment just in case. I am SO glad we did. Ever since DS was about 5 months old, I had this nagging feeling that something wasn't right and that he might need some extra help, but I resisted for a number or reasons (mostly not knowing what to expect and wondering if him needing extra help was a reflection of my parenting). We had our observation in September and started weekly therapy a few days after. Our physical therapist was AWESOME. She developed a 6-month plan, was incredibly flexible and scheduled appointments around our work schedules, and helped us discover all sorts of community resources that we didn't know were available. By the time we hit the 6-month mark of therapy, DS had surpassed his therapy goals and she determined he no longer needed PT. He's now out-running me and DH and although I know part of his delay was due to him just needing more time than others, I can't say enough about what a great experience it was for us. She really made an impact.
So all of that is to say that I think a call to EI is worth it even if it turns out that there isn't a problem. I am a worry-wort by nature so I understand not wanting to ask for help unless it's really "needed", but this is what your tax dollars pay for and if your little guy doesn't need therapy, then you can breathe a sigh of relief and can be glad you followed-up. If he does need therapy, then they'll hook you up with whatever services he needs and you can feel relief knowing you're on the path to getting where he needs to be. I was actually shocked by how many people do take advantage of these services, so don't assume (like I originally did) that a delay means you've dropped the ball at parenting. Not true at all. Kids have all sorts of delays for all sorts of reasons and that's what EI is there for.
Good luck! Feel free to PM me if you want any more information.
Rubysue, thank you so much for talking about your experience with EI! DS has his evaluation tomorrow morning, and I'm really starting to feel nervous. The more posts I see on here about what other LOs are doing/saying the more I see how DS seems to be falling behind. I know that all LOs move at their own pace, but I have been having a nagging suspicion that my DS might be one of those kids that needs a little extra attention to bring him up to speed. If they find nothing wrong then I'll be able to stop stressing myself, but if he does have a legitimate issue I want to know I'm doing everything I possibly can to help DS be successful.
I have also been second guessing myself. I'm a worrier and I wonder if I'm overreacting since it seems like most moms here are waiting until two to do anything. I keep stressing that DS is behind because I'm not doing the right things to help him along. I constantly worry if I'm talking to him enough, playing with him enough, letting him do his own thing enough, etc, etc.
It's really nice to hear about another moms experience with EI and know this isn't uncommon, and hear what a good experience it was for you.
Super and CMonkey - I'm so glad it helped! I was very nervous prior to that assessment appointment because I thought the therapist would observe DS and then say, "well it's no wonder he's not crawling because you are doing everything wrong!" In reality it was nothing like that and she even stressed how important it is not to beat yourself up (the parents who are actually doing harm are those who wouldn't even notice or care that their child had delayed milestones). I'm a big believer in following your gut-feeling, so if you feel like it's something you need to follow-up on, you're absolutely doing the right thing. Even if they confirm that there's a delay, trust me - the sense of relief from at least having a PLAN is unbelievable.
Most of the first appointment is focused on leveling expectations so be prepared for a ton of paperwork. If your EI program works like ours did, you don't get the assessment results right away; instead, they observe, take notes, then review their findings in front of a board. If that committee agree that early intervention services would benefit your child, then they'll schedule another appointment to review their findings and develop a short-term plan (ours was 6 months). If I had known how easy it was going to be, I would have called a lot sooner. Actually, I would have called immediately if I had known how relieved I would feel to start proactively working with the program.
Good luck and let us know how it goes! I know it is a very emotional process but I've got your back!
