Bringing baby to shower

Nokkouttmomma · May 2013

Ok so I have kind of a dilemma.

My cousin is getting married 2 months after I have my baby and her shower is 2 weeks after my due date. I don't know if I should bring the baby with me to shower or what I should do. I'm a single mom so there's no dad in the picture.

It will probably be the first time most of my family will be meeting the baby and I really do not want to take my cousins day away from her. I want to make sure that she gets to have all the attention on her and her wedding rather than being shared with the new babymy family goes NUTS over babies I really only have 2 choices, take him with me or trust my dad to watch him for 1012 hours 3 hours away from me.

My cousin has also had a hard time with getting pregnant so I know it's a touchy thing for her and don't want to rub it in her face on a day that's supposed to be all about her.

I have no idea what I should do, I'm so torn! I know that if I ask her or my aunt neither of them would tell me to keep him at home because they wouldn't want to hurt my feelings so I really don't want to go that direction.

Please help!!!
sorry if like half of that didn't make sense, I've got 3rd tri scatter brain lol!

ClandestineX · May 2013

You shouldn't bring kids to showers...

Your father helped raise you didn't he? If he did I bet there were some times he watched you for that long, besides tell him to call you if it is too much.

pinottoparenthood · May 2013

I would NOT bring baby. A) you're right, it will detract attention from your cousin's big day, and

babies aren't supposed to be around crowds until they're 6 weeks and that sounds like a lot of people passing the baby around and sharing germs. If you're really not comfortable leaving baby with your dad, you might have to skip out on the shower. If you're breastfeeding, leaving LO might not be an option... and IF your baby is already taking bottles, you will have to manage to pump a few times while you are away from baby. I would probably send a gift and explain that you probably won't make it because of your brand new baby. Also, don't forget that your baby might not be on time... mine was a week late, so if I wanted to go to an event two weeks after my due date, he would have only been one week old.

buffyverrban1 · May 2013

I would politely decline and send a gift.

1.) You don't even know if you will have had your baby yet or how old it will be. I was 11 days late with my DD. If that was to happen to you, you woiuld have a 3 day old baby.

2.) I would NEVER have been able to be apart from my baby when it was 2 weeks old for 10-12 hours, 3 hours away. (I didn't even leave my baby at all until she was 4 months old and that was with her dad for an hour.) I think it's too soon, and you probably won't be feeling up for it.

3.) It is exhausting having a newborn. Even if you have a 2 week old, you aren't going to be sleeping at night, a 10-12 hour day would be too much IMO.

4.) I think it's too soon to leave a baby that young without you for that long. Babies need their mommas. If it was 10 minutes away, I might think differently, but I think that at 2 weeks (or less) old, your baby needs you. (That's why they call the first 3 months the 4th trimester)

jbatch · May 2013

I'd take the baby.. I know I'm in the minority here.. I took my baby at about two weeks to a baby shower..

pitterpatter129 · May 2013

At 2 weeks old (vaginal birth) I had so many stitches I still wasn't cleared to drive yet! That coupled with the crime scene like bleeding and learning to breastfeed/feeding baby every 2 hrs night and day...yeah, I'd vote send a gift in the mail.

If you end up with a csection, you definitely can't go. I was still in the hospital at 6 days pp with my csection! Oh, and I agree with people that you might not even have a baby then! I was 2 weeks late with my first. And I think you aren't allowed to travel further than 1 hr from home that close to the end if you are still pregnant...

lifewrite · May 2013

pinottoparenthood:
I would NOT bring baby. A) you're right, it will detract attention from your cousin's big day, and babies aren't supposed to be around crowds until they're 6 weeks and that sounds like a lot of people passing the baby around and sharing germs. If you're really not comfortable leaving baby with your dad, you might have to skip out on the shower. If you're breastfeeding, leaving LO might not be an option... and IF your baby is already taking bottles, you will have to manage to pump a few times while you are away from baby. I would probably send a gift and explain that you probably won't make it because of your brand new baby. Also, don't forget that your baby might not be on time... mine was a week late, so if I wanted to go to an event two weeks after my due date, he would have only been one week old.

All of this! Plus at 2 weeks pp there is no way I'd sit in a car for that long. The first 2 weeks are hard and you will probably be so sleep deprived. I really don't think I would have gone to a shower when I was 2 weeks pp. It was hard enough going down the street to my MILs lol.

Unknown · May 2013

This content has been removed.

brauchtm · May 2013

I agree with everyone else. You are very thoughtful to think of her this way - send her a very thoughtful gift and decline the invite - also plan some one on one time with her to celebrate her upcoming wedding so she knows how important she is to you.

Angela814 · May 2013

buffyverrban1:
I would politely decline and send a gift.nbsp;1. You don't even know if you will have had your baby yet or how old it will be. I was 11 days late with my DD. If that was to happen to you, you woiuld have a 3 day old baby. 2. I would NEVER have been able to be apart from my baby when it was 2 weeks old for 1012 hours, 3 hours away. I didn't even leave my baby at all until she was 4 months old and that was with her dad for an hour. I think it's too soon, and you probably won't be feeling up for it. 3. It is exhausting having a newborn. Even if you have a 2 week old, you aren't going to be sleeping at night, a 1012 hour day would be too much IMO.nbsp;4. I think it's too soon to leave a baby that young without you for that long. Babies need their mommas. If it was 10 minutes away, I might think differently, but I think that at 2 weeks or less old, your baby needs you. That's why they call the first 3 months the 4th trimesternbsp;

Agree completely.

jkuhmann · May 2013

buffyverrban1:

I would politely decline and send a gift.

1.) You don't even know if you will have had your baby yet or how old it will be. I was 11 days late with my DD. If that was to happen to you, you woiuld have a 3 day old baby.

2.) I would NEVER have been able to be apart from my baby when it was 2 weeks old for 10-12 hours, 3 hours away. (I didn't even leave my baby at all until she was 4 months old and that was with her dad for an hour.) I think it's too soon, and you probably won't be feeling up for it.

3.) It is exhausting having a newborn. Even if you have a 2 week old, you aren't going to be sleeping at night, a 10-12 hour day would be too much IMO.

4.) I think it's too soon to leave a baby that young without you for that long. Babies need their mommas. If it was 10 minutes away, I might think differently, but I think that at 2 weeks (or less) old, your baby needs you. (That's why they call the first 3 months the 4th trimester)

This exactly.

Nokkouttmomma · May 2013

Thanks ladies! I wasn't sure if it was just a FTM thing to not want to leave him for so long or what. I was supposed to help with the shower so ill just put all the effort into planning it and send a nice gift with my mom for her to open!

Want a personalized experience?

Bringing baby to shower

Re: Bringing baby to shower

Choose Another Board

Search Boards