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Potty training a stubborn toddler

spring_timespring_time member
in Toddlers: 24 Months+

My DS is 3 years old.  We started potty training early this week.  The first three days were great.  He showed tremendous control and did not have a single accident.  Apparently the novelty has worn off and he has now decided that he does not want to use the potty.  We have had "accident" after accident the past two days.  I keep reading that a child should not be punished for potty training, but when I ask him why he is having these accidents he says he just does not want to use the potty.  I am not sure what to do.  He is very stubborn and I feel like we are starting a power struggle that I would not like to engage in.

I should say that we started with giving M&M rewards and making a huge deal out of his accomplishments.  Yesterday, when things started going downhill, I introduced a sticker chart that rewarded staying dry in addition to the M&Ms for going in the potty.  He has just decided he is done with it. 


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Re: Potty training a stubborn toddler

  • TiffanyBerryTiffanyBerry member

    Can you just back off for a few weeks? Do you have to do it now?

    Can you leave him in underwear, not make a big deal about it, and make him help clean up messes? 

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  • sschwegesschwege member

    I think part of what makes potty training so hard is that they have to stop what they are doing.  Is it possible to put the potty where he plays?  

    If you think it's turning into a power struggle, I would turn it over to him.  Honestly I wouldn't even comment, have him get clean clothes and take ownership.   

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  • flyingsaucerflyingsaucer member
    I had such an easy time training LO #1, but now DD #2 is being so diffficult! I feel your pain!  The one thing I can say is, don't let him see you sweat!  If he sees you getting all stressed, it's over for you!  Continue to work at it and make a big deal when he does great!  It WILL happen
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  • BeebopandBuddyBeebopandBuddy member

    My daughter did this too.  I did not back off because I did not want her to think it is optional and, if I don't want to do it, I don't have to.  Not in a forcing way, but I wanted her to know that big girls do this, she is a big girl, therefore she should do it too.

    I ended up trying to come up with incentives to get her to actually sit.  She got a sticker for sitting and a treat(fruit snack) for going.  I also went to the library and got about 10 books that I put in a plastic box next to the potty.  If she wanted to read those books, she had to sit on the potty to read them.

    You know your son.  If you think he is just going to dig in his heels, then maybe you should take a break.  However, if you think you might be able to grab his interest, you may want to give it a try.

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  • orangecurlsorangecurls member
    What about taking him to the potty at regular intervals? [After he wales up, beforeeals, snacks, naps and bed?]

    Or get him one of those potty reminder watches so that he has more control?
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