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Vasectomy consult on wed... getting cold feet.

thatoneredheadthatoneredhead member
in One & Done: Only child

A bit of back story- we were planning on using mirena the whole 5 years and if we didnt want one before that, we knew we would be done for sure. It grew into the wall and isnt insuring me at the 99% its supposed to, so we are planning on getting the vasectomy now instead of waiting since we are pretty dang sure.

So until we scheduled this thing, I was really excited about being entertainment rather than a referee, never taking another heparin shot, never being pregnant again ... all that. ALL of it that comes with o&d.

Then we scheduled the appt and now Im like, we are pretty young. Our baby is pretty young. What if I get majorly baby hungry in a few years? Will it be easier knowing that it isnt an option? Thats what Im hoping. Im also really worried about it not going smoothly for my husband. Ugh. This is a BIG decision. 

So Im not asking to justify it for me, Im just seeking advice from anyone else is a little further down the road in being truly one and done (of course any advice about the big V-day itself is warmly welcomed)


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Re: Vasectomy consult on wed... getting cold feet.

  • kaitylinkaitylin member
    If you are having any doubts you should wait.

    Can't you have Mirena removed and a new one put in instead? That seems smarter and then get the Vasectomy when there is absolutely no question you are done.
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  • ferris0906ferris0906 member

    I agree with pp that if you are unsure, then wait.  I would still go to the consult and see what information the doctor may be able to add to help make the decision. 

    If you end up deciding to wait, then make another appointment with your doctor to discuss further BC options for you (even though I agree it would be nice to be done with all of that!). 

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  • Chapter79Chapter79 member

    I would go to the consult and get all the info (you can even talk with the doctor about your unsure feelings) .. but I'm honestly not sure I would get it done when you aren't 100%.  Like you said, it's a BIG decision. If you are having more than one doubt, you're not ready for it.

    My husband had it done, but we were 410% sure and haven't had an ounce of doubt since that day. (and it's been over 5 years). 

    You may (like you said) handle it just fine when you realize it's done and you have no choice, but what if it's the opposite? What if you live with regret or something?

    Don't worry about your husband, though. The procedure is SO simple. We were seriously in the room for not even 15 minutes.  It was truly no big deal. Soreness over the weekend for my husband- nothing some painkillers and a frozen bag of peas couldn't fix ;)

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  • FianschneidFianschneid member

    DH has his consult on Wednesday, too. We were reading through the paperwork and every time it mentioned how permanent the procedure is, we said some variation of "good" or "I certainly hope so."

    What I'm saying is that we are 100% there and this really is for good. If you aren't in that place yet, it might make sense to have DH go on the consult for the information but keep an open mind and have a bigger discussion before going through with it.

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  • thatoneredheadthatoneredhead member

    My yearly is up in june so I definitely want to talk to my doc first. Maybe my doc can buy me more time. My insurance doesnt cover BC which is why I didnt want another $1k mirena. 

    I think Ill have a better idea at the consult as well. Thanks for the advice ladies. It's so easy to say you'll never want another but it's a little different when you're actually putting it into action.  

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  • MonkeySenderMonkeySender member
    When DH and I had originally discussed being O&D, Ella was only about 10 months old. We decided to table it for a year and talk more about a vasectomy later. That was over a year and a half ago. He hasn't brought it back up, so I haven't either. I am pretty sure, but every time I try to bring it up I get emotional... so I figured I will let him bring it back up and we will go from there. In the meantime, we have been using condoms. Hormonal BC and I are not friends.
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  • Shayna0182Shayna0182 member

    When I decided to get my tubes tied, it took months of going back and forth.   I had a ton of genetic testing done.  Eventually, I got so sick of the hormones from Mirena, that I was ready to finally make peace with my decision.   I remember the night before the procedure, I was still conflicted, but I figured I would always feel that way until I got it over and done with.

    My point is, the feelings are normal, and this is just a consult. Nothing has to be done at the appointment. All you're getting is the information about it. Go and then think about it.

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  • meo34meo34 member
    Another vote for go to the consult and then wait if you aren't 100 percent.  We waiting until my son was 4 even though we were advised not to have any more children, just to be sure.  The info packets emphasizes  the permant nature I think to draw out any doubts!  
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  • blondolphnblondolphn member
    My dh is getting his shortly after our baby is born healthy. If we want to have another, there are options for me to get pregnant.
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