No kids....

AACaHa13 · May 2013

What is a polite way of writing on shower invites that kids are not invited? I feel bad but almost half of my guests have kids And I honestly don't think baby showers are for kids running around.

MrsNyberg09 · May 2013

just put on there adults only

MommyAmes2 · May 2013

Best hope half those guests can find sitters.

Just put adults only on the invites.

MommyKristin88 · May 2013

Just put "Adults Only" or "Ladies Only" if it's not co-ed.

girlmama83 · May 2013

By addressing the invitation only to the adult being invited, they really should get the hint that they are the only ones invited. Hopefully they will ask when RSVPing and at that point your host can let them know it's adults only. It would be pretty rude to show up with kids without asking first.

MommyKristin88 · May 2013

MommyAmes2:
Best hope half those guests can find sitters. Just put adults only on the invites.

At my shower, so many people RSVP'd "yes", but didn't show up, because they couldn't find sitters. Resulted in a lot of extra food, gift bags, etc. that weren't needed, because of the low turn-out. Keep that in mind.

mamainseptember · May 2013

At my shower my SIL specifically told everyone not bring kids. Three women brought their kids. I'd put "adults only" but be prepared for people not to listen

MommyKristin88 · May 2013

lindsey61811:

By addressing the invitation only to the adult being invited, they really should get the hint that they are the only ones invited. Hopefully they will ask when RSVPing and at that point your host can let them know it's adults only. It would be pretty rude to show up with kids without asking first.

If only people had that much tact. LOL, I've seen it happen many times for baby showers and bridal showers. For my circle of friends/family, I would definitely put it in writing!

MommyR8113 · May 2013

Mmm I'm not sure there is a polite way to say that considering the shower is for a kid.. I sugget just putting the woman's name like Mrs. Judith Smith and make it a formal invite then when they RSVP if they ask about children have your hostess tell them you'd like to keep it kid free. My husband comes from a very big family 32 1st cousins which most have children and we always have the little girls at showers bc then they get to see what a baby shower is and keep the tradition going. For me it was just a part of growing up. if its a formal shower the parents should know they need to control their children. I had little girls at my bridal shower and they made it even better bc they were more excited to celebrate than some of the older women. For our wedding we had no one user 18 but the way we put names on the invites made that very clear, however that was an evening of celebrating with alcohol not a celebration for a baby who will eventually be one of those kids.

WashingtonQueen · May 2013

I always find it hilarious when people don't want kids at a baby shower.

hazy19 · May 2013

You could put something like on wedding invites that say " adult gathering to celebrate..." Rather than just an adult only, it sounds less harsh.

MommyKristin88 · May 2013

WashingtonQueen:
I always find it hilarious when people don't want kids at a baby shower.

My host decided it was best, because of a small budget and the need to keep the guest list short.

amarissa85 · May 2013

My best friend did this for my last shower, she put that on the invitation and a lot of my friends were kind of offended by it. I wouldn't have personally chosen to do that but she was hosting and I just let her handle everything. A lot of my guests did not come because of that. They couldn't find sitters and such.

RoadToFertility · May 2013

AACaHa13:
What is a polite way of writing on shower invites that kids are not invited? I feel bad but almost half of my guests have kids And I honestly don't think baby showers are for kids running around.

I am in the same position but I didn't put that on the invite because I knew it would offend some people and because of the whole sitter issue. My mom is throwing my shower and is paying per head so it would really suck if people showed up with a ton of kids, but my mom agreed that it was wise to just address it to the individual and just see what happens. Hopefully people will get the hint. Honestly, if it weren't at a fancy hall I wouldn't mind kids coming. I had kids at my wedding reception and they were the cutest dancers ever and when I watch my wedding video it's always so cute to see a small circle of kids in the corner dancing lol.

sleeping5beauty · May 2013

WashingtonQueen:
I always find it hilarious when people don't want kids at a baby shower.

I agree! I baby shower is celebrating a new child being born into this world, but I'm not allowed to bring my kids that I celebrate everyday.... I have never been to a baby shower that was no kids. I don't think I would go if I was invited.

JBrooks315 · May 2013

I'm not really sure there is a polite way. You might also get a lot of people who don't come because they can't get a sitter. Personally almost every single guest I invited has kids most of them under 6. It's going to be an adventurer if all of them show up with their children. But I love kids so it's no big deal for me. We are probably going to set up a table with some coloring books and crayons and maybe a couple of puzzles. Maybe you could do that just in case some people decide to bring their kids anyway.

ELauren88 · May 2013

There really is no polite way to say this, and you defiantly risk a lot of people not coming.

When I threw my friends shower, I didn't even think about this, and assumed people would tell me if they were bringing their children - they did not. They also did not control their children and I ended up with vanilla yogurt all over my couch (I had a yogurt bar = not kid friendly). Had I known that people were going to bring their kids, I would not have told them 'no', but I would have made sure I had some form of entertainment for them! My home is not 'baby-proof' at all, and I would have set up an area they could have played without ruining my furniture.

plunderb · May 2013

Is there any way you could get a younger cousin or sister-of-a-friend (or a couple of them) to take on babysitting duty on shower day? It may be difficult for all of your guests to find childcare, but if you had supervised activities set up outside or in another room, that would be very welcoming for all of them. I mean, it won't work if your shower is a fancy brunch or something, but if it's at someone's house or a hall, you could make it work.

AACaHa13 · May 2013

Yeah I guess I see it both ways. I mean yes, a baby shower is for a baby that will eventually be a kid, but I am usually that person that sees someone bring a kid to a shower and I wonder... hmm why are they at a baby shower? I can understand it can be hard for some people to find a sitter but then that's just a reason not to come. Just like there are other reasons people can't come. I personally wouldn't take my kid to a baby shower unless he or she was at the age to sit at the table with me and be well behaved. Some people don't control their kids and I find it annoying when the kids are so into opening the gifts etc. and running out of control because they are bored....

JilllyBean · May 2013

I don't understand why anyone would think they could bring kids. I also dont know why, as an adult, you would really want to. Have a nice day out with some adults and you dont have to worry about taking care of your kids! It really isn't an event made for kids. Sitting around for long periods of time. I don't know, it isnt customary in my circle and I would think it odd in general. If you can't find a sitter, I guess you can't go! It isn't the end of the world.

WashingtonQueen · May 2013

plunderb:
Is there any way you could get a younger cousin or sister-of-a-friend (or a couple of them) to take on babysitting duty on shower day? It may be difficult for all of your guests to find childcare, but if you had supervised activities set up outside or in another room, that would be very welcoming for all of them. I mean, it won't work if your shower is a fancy brunch or something, but if it's at someone's house or a hall, you could make it work.

This is an awesome idea!!

AACaHa13 · May 2013

JilllyBean:
I don't understand why anyone would think they could bring kids. I also dont know why, as an adult, you would really want to. Have a nice day out with some adults and you dont have to worry about taking care of your kids! It really isn't an event made for kids. Sitting around for long periods of time. I don't know, it isnt customary in my circle and I would think it odd in general. If you can't find a sitter, I guess you can't go! It isn't the end of the world.

I completely agree.

erikalovesmatt · May 2013

WashingtonQueen:
I always find it hilarious when people don't want kids at a baby shower.

I concur.

erikalovesmatt · May 2013

WashingtonQueen:
I always find it hilarious when people don't want kids at a baby shower.

I concur.

BelhurstBride · May 2013

WashingtonQueen:
I always find it hilarious when people don't want kids at a baby shower.

Seriously. I always side eye kid free baby showers.

katiebenes · May 2013

lindsey61811:
By addressing the invitation only to the adult being invited, they really should get the hint that they are the only ones invited. Hopefully they will ask when RSVPing and at that point your host can let them know it's adults only. It would be pretty rude to show up with kids without asking first.

yeah, we only put adult names on our wedding invite. people responded to THAT by writing in their children's names on the RSVP. People don't always get the hint.

OP I'd go with Adults Only on the invite

Laurakat81 · May 2013

I never even thought to say no kids. We did a couples shower and 90% of the guests have children. No one brought them. Only one couple couldn't find a sitter and didn't show. I guess I assumed it was just common sense. I'm surprised some people "side eye" a kids free shower or that people would just show up with kids without asking.

magdalina.h · May 2013

Not sure since kids were invited to mine.

amandamays88 · May 2013

Laurakat81:
I never even thought to say no kids. We did a couples shower and 90 of the guests have children. No one brought them. Only one couple couldn't find a sitter and didn't show. I guess I assumed it was just common sense. I'm surprised some people "side eye" a kids free shower or that people would just show up with kids without asking.

This. Most of the people I know who have kids would prefer to get a babysitter instead of bringing their kids. Maybe it's different for each family or culture. I know I was always allowed to go to showers when I was a pre teen haha I wouldn't mind the children in my family coming but I agree that maybe the host cannot afford to pay for everyone's children. I mean, If I invite a friend from work and she has 3 children, the host would have to feed 4 so I can have that one coworker at my shower? That's silly IMO. Most showers I have been too have been kid free without the invite specifying so. I just kind of thought it was one of those unwritten rules that most showers are for adults.

kkay1982 · May 2013

Laurakat81:
I never even thought to say no kids. We did a couples shower and 90 of the guests have children. No one brought them. Only one couple couldn't find a sitter and didn't show. I guess I assumed it was just common sense. I'm surprised some people "side eye" a kids free shower or that people would just show up with kids without asking.

Same goes for me. We didn't specify and each time I had one mom different one each time ask if it was okay to bring their under 6 month old baby. Said yes because it wasn't like the baby was going to be running around. I think having a with kids or kid free shower are both perfectly fine depending in what you and the hostess wants. The whole feel of the shower and what you plan do to or make available would be different. People should always have the tact to ask before bringing their kids and not feel offended when people say they prefer to keep it kid free.

amybeth1016 · May 2013

Personally, I welcome kids at a shower. They are free entertainment! Besides addressing the invite to Ms. Jane Doe and hopin for the best, maybe calling it a Ladies Luncheon on the invite. Maybe they'll get the hint then. That's what my church ladies did for my bridal shower.

bethanyharrie · May 2013

msspeedymarie:
sleeping5beauty:
WashingtonQueen:
I always find it hilarious when people don't want kids at a baby shower.
I agree! I baby shower is celebrating a new child being born into this world, but I'm not allowed to bring my kids that I celebrate everyday.... I have never been to a baby shower that was no kids. I don't think I would go if I was invited.
The baby is not the guest of honor at a baby shower. The baby is not there. The baby is not talking to people. The baby does not care what kind of gifts are purchased.
A shower is for the mother to be, to welcome her to motherhood. She is the guest of honor. Showers are traditionally adult parties that involve adult conversation and adult food. It is perfectly acceptable to not want small children present. I would think that most mothers would enjoy an afternoon talking to other adults, that did not require them to chase their kids around, share food off their plate, wipe noses and butts, etc. Your kids don't have to be at every event you are at. Sometimes adult-only events are a welcome change.

This x2. In addition, I've often seen mothers treat these events as an opportunity for others to entertain/watch their children. It puts such unnecessary pressure on the host.

MrsBlindLove · May 2013

msspeedymarie:
sleeping5beauty:
WashingtonQueen:
I always find it hilarious when people don't want kids at a baby shower.
I agree! I baby shower is celebrating a new child being born into this world, but I'm not allowed to bring my kids that I celebrate everyday.... I have never been to a baby shower that was no kids. I don't think I would go if I was invited.
The baby is not the guest of honor at a baby shower. The baby is not there. The baby is not talking to people. The baby does not care what kind of gifts are purchased.
A shower is for the mother to be, to welcome her to motherhood. She is the guest of honor. Showers are traditionally adult parties that involve adult conversation and adult food. It is perfectly acceptable to not want small children present. I would think that most mothers would enjoy an afternoon talking to other adults, that did not require them to chase their kids around, share food off their plate, wipe noses and butts, etc. Your kids don't have to be at every event you are at. Sometimes adult-only events are a welcome change. 

Completely agree!

I am there to celebrate the mother to be and enjoy other women's company, not their children's.

As for sitters, what are the husbands up to? I understand work can get in the way but not for all of them for heavens sales.

Soleil3 · May 2013

WashingtonQueen:
I always find it hilarious when people don't want kids at a baby shower.

I greatly dislike 99% of kids, so I get it.

The whole point of a babyshower anyway is to be a AW and get all the attention, cant really do that if you are busy corralling little monsters.

Ahtnamas6789 · May 2013

JilllyBean:
I don't understand why anyone would think they could bring kids. I also dont know why, as an adult, you would really want to. Have a nice day out with some adults and you dont have to worry about taking care of your kids! It really isn't an event made for kids. Sitting around for long periods of time. I don't know, it isnt customary in my circle and I would think it odd in general. If you can't find a sitter, I guess you can't go! It isn't the end of the world.nbsp;

Agreed.

RivieraBound · May 2013

msspeedymarie:
sleeping5beauty:
WashingtonQueen:
I always find it hilarious when people don't want kids at a baby shower.
I agree! I baby shower is celebrating a new child being born into this world, but I'm not allowed to bring my kids that I celebrate everyday.... I have never been to a baby shower that was no kids. I don't think I would go if I was invited.
The baby is not the guest of honor at a baby shower. The baby is not there. The baby is not talking to people. The baby does not care what kind of gifts are purchased.
A shower is for the mother to be, to welcome her to motherhood. She is the guest of honor. Showers are traditionally adult parties that involve adult conversation and adult food. It is perfectly acceptable to not want small children present. I would think that most mothers would enjoy an afternoon talking to other adults, that did not require them to chase their kids around, share food off their plate, wipe noses and butts, etc. Your kids don't have to be at every event you are at. Sometimes adult-only events are a welcome change.

THANK YOU

What is the first response most ladies on the shower board have to the "Every child deserves to be celebrated" reasoning for having a 2nd shower? The shower is not for the BABY its for the MOTHER.

I went to a shower yesterday that had kids. I had the job of keeping track of who gave what for thank you notes. It was chaos because all the kids wanted to "help" the MTB open her gifts by removing the stuff out of the bags and just plopping it in front of her.

LnR70707 · May 2013

JNL$LSM:
erikalovesmatt:
WashingtonQueen:
I always find it hilarious when people don't want kids at a baby shower.
I concur.
Totally disagree what if it's a nice restaurant and the host is paying per person.

Or anywhere. Because baby showers are boring as hell and what child wants to watch an adult open 30+ gifts slowly as everyone oohs and ahhs over them.

There is no polite way to indicate no kids, but that is up to your hostess to worry about.

darjeeling · May 2013

Soleil3:
WashingtonQueen:
I always find it hilarious when people don't want kids at a baby shower.
I greatly dislike 99% of kids, so I get it.
The whole point of a babyshower anyway is to be a AW and get all the attention, cant really do that if you are busy corralling little monsters.

vintageutopia · May 2013

This isn't a subject that I get up in arms about. I don't think there is anything wrong with people choosing not to have kids at their shower/wedding/celebration and I think it is equally fine if they do.

Kids add a completey different dynamic to a celebration and some parents aren't very good about making sure Susie & Jimmy are supervised or well-behaved. I have been to successful celebrations that have had kids present and other celebrations where I think it would have been wise for the parents to leave the kids home. However, some parents feel entitled to bring their kids everywhere and don't always exercise good judgment.

I would phrase the invitation in such a way that it left no doubt. Ladies only, adults only, etc.

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