Just needed to tell someone

Geekywife · May 2013

So I was due for my period on Monday. Monday came and went and nothing. Tuesday again nothing. I didn't test because I had a very stressful month at work and there was a chance that I was late from stress. So I didn't start thinking about testing until Wednesday. I decided that I would not test until Monday because I didn't want to be all depressed on mother's day when celebrating with family if I wasn't and I know that if I was I wouldn't tell anyone because until I get to see the doctor I would not want to say anything just in case. Also the "big" announcement will not be until I am starting my 2nd trimester. That is just the way I have always wanted it.

As Wednesday slowly turned into Thursday I started to notice things that might mean I was finally going to be a mom at last. I was starting to be hopeful and started to pick out father's day gifts for my husband.

I started Thursday afternoon.

My husband asked if I was going to be upset because we hadn't been able to the deed much this last month. We had the best timing in the world though. I told him I would be ok. So I am just fine in front of him but I am so not ok with this. No one knows we are trying because I don't want the "so what is wrong with you that you can't get pregnant" looks that I have seen them give others before. This is the only place I feel safe with saying anything.

Thanks for reading this.

cdb2013 · May 2013

This same exact thing happened to me this week, except I was supposed to get it Sunday and got it Wednesday afternoon. I had all the same feelings you did. It is ok that you are "not ok" with this. Don't be ashamed of your feelings. I've learned that you have to accept how you are feeling and if you need to cry...then cry...if you need to scream...then scream. It's an emotional roller coaster no matter what point you are at in the journey...but just know you are not alone, b/c alot of us feel the exact same way you do. Smile

ksgsmu · May 2013

I am so sorry- I know how you feel...

Do you temp/chart... that may help you in the future to know when you ovulated so you know when you are truly late or you just ovulated late. A BFN is always a sad thing though even when you can see it on your chart.

hang in there- so sorry!

Geekywife · May 2013

I was watching my CM so I know it wasn't a late ovulation. It was just my body being stressy, but thank you for that thought.

Jacque Sills · May 2013

I am so sorry, Geekywife......I know it doesn't make it any better, especially before Mothers Day. Deep breath. Sending you lots of (((((Hugs)))))

Take care.

QOTR · May 2013

I'm sorry. It's hard not to get hopeful. Don't be too hard on yourself for feeling disappointed.

HeathernSteven · May 2013

Geekywife I sorry : share your feelings here, that's what we are here for, each other.

Go sorry, hugs

gscoville · May 2013

I'm sorry for this, TTC sure can mess with your mind. My last cycle was like this, I normally get my period 11 days after I ovulate, but last cycle I got to 16 DPO before getting my period. I tested three times that week, sure I was pregnant, but all BFNs of course. It really hurt and I cried a lot. I normally have such short cycles that I get my period long before I ever have a chance to think I'm 'late', so don't often have to test and see BFNs. This one really threw me for a loop. Don't be hard on yourself for feeling what you feel!

Geekywife:
I was watching my CM so I know it wasn't a late ovulation. It was just my body being stressy, but thank you for that thought.

Might I just comment that CM is probably the least reliable predictor of ovulation, especially at our ages? I find I either don't get a lot of EWCM, or I get it randomly throughout my cycle. If I relied just on CM, I would think I ovulated several times in my cycle, which I know can't be true. If you want all available information to help you in your TTC journey, temping in conjunction with OPKs is really the way to go. Good luck!

*sparky* · May 2013

I am so sorry. No one knows we are TTC either because I don't want to have to go through that stress either. And this month I am having a cycle like yours - I am almost always either early or exactly on time...and now i am two days late. We did not TTC at the right time this month and I have cramps and wicked PMS so I know I am not PG, but being late like this is still screwing with my head. This morning I was digging in my bathroom cabinet to see if I had any PG tests and would have taken one if I had any left. Even though I am positive it would be a BFN. It is stressful - the 2WW is bad enough and doesn't need to be any longer!

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