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January 2013 Moms
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Mothers with losses...advice needed

ReeceFamilyReeceFamily member
in January 2013 Moms
I went to a Mothers Day event at LOs daycare today. In talking to one of the mothers, I realized that I know who she is from the PGAL board. She had a particularly heart wrenching story of loss and when she mentioned a previous child who had died, and when I saw her necklace with the previous child's name, it clicked. I knew this woman lived in my community, but we have never met and we didn't have a strong online connection. So what should I do? I'd like to acknowledge her loss as a fellow PGAL, when she brought it up I was too surprised to respond well. But do I let on that I "know" her from TB? What's the etiquette? How would you handle this?
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Re: Mothers with losses...advice needed

  • 82Sonia82Sonia member
    Does this other mom seem to appreciate her anonymity or has she given so many details online that it wouldn't be difficult to figure out who she is? If she's open about her name, her child, her experiences, etc. AND you want to befriend her in real life, I think you should introduce yourself.

    Say something like you've also had a loss and her story actually reminded you of someone on a forum that you participate on. Then say something like "you're not on The Bump are you?" That way she can lie and say no if she's uncomfortable.

    I think if you have no interest in being friends with her, just leave it alone. She might appreciate the anonymity of the Internet for sharing her grief and not want to feel like she has to censor herself on TB because a DC mom knows who she is in real life.

    ETA I haven't had a loss but I am one of those people who likes the anonymity of the internet so just my two cents.

     

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  • NoetholaNoethola member
    If she is wearing a piece of memorial jewelry, you can ackowledge her loss with that as your connecting piece. You wouldnt need to mention anything about the loss from learning about it on the bump. Just acknowledge her jewelry and take her lead from there. I agree with previous poster. If you want to befriend her, you can reveal your online connection later on. It does not need to be done right away. If you are not interested in befriending her, dont mention it.
    Lilypie - (qptF)


    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers 
    "Elsie Irene was born sleeping at 35w 6d on December 8, 2012. Mommy and Daddy miss you sweet girl."


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