Trouble TTC

Worst Nightmare (BFP mentioned, not mine)

My sister told me tonight that she is pregnant.  I can't even breathe....

She is 23, just married last fall, lives in a crappy 1BR apartment, has no money, and a husband that is the laziest person I have ever met.  Did I mention incredibly immature?  Like, I mean, argues with toddlers, can hardly take care of herself, has emotional issues, you get the picture. 

So, she will be the one to give my parents their first grandchild.  And the worst part is I would bet the farm that she did this on purpose just to finally feel like she beat me at something.  

She told me, I asked her if she was joking, she said no, and I told her I had to go and could not get out of the house fast enough.  2 hours later, I'm still sobbing.  No one will ever be able to explain how this is even the slightest bit fair.  To make matters worse, I'm 10dpiui with a BFN this morning and zero symptoms.  

I just don't know what to say.... 

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Re: Worst Nightmare (BFP mentioned, not mine)

  • OMG niffie I am so so sorry!!!! ((HUGS!!!)) Wish there is something I could say to help you feel better...besides to drink lots of alcohol.
    Anniversary Image and video hosting by TinyPic
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    3TC March Siggy Challenge: Funny Internet Meme Image and video hosting by TinyPic
    Age: Me 26, DH 27, Married Oct. 10, 2009 ,TTC since March 2012
    Problem: Irregular menstruation, unexplained
    Nov&Dec-Provera because of no period after 35+ days
    First RE appt 1/10/2013
    Tests: TSH (normal), Prolactin (normal), SA (abnormal)
    Hysteroscopy (normal) and PCOS labs (negative/normal) 1/15/2013
    2/1/13- HPT BFP but Beta Hcg was negative
    Plan: Femara + Trigger + IUI in April if no real BFP before then Bloggy Blog!
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  •  I am so sorry. I wish there was something I could say to comfort you. Sending (((HUGS))) to you. 

     

    **************SIGGY WARNING**************

    BLOG

    Me 32 :: DH 41

     TTC since November, 2011

    DH's SA : Excellent

    Lap and Hysteroscopy June 2012

    DX: PCOS, Stage III Endo, slight Adenomyosis, blocked tube, and probable LPD

    Treatments:  6 Months Lupron Depot injections; 1500 mg metformin; 3 cycles of Clomid + TI = BFN

    3 endometrial biopsies all were "out of phase" 

    September - December, 2013:  Break to lose weight and get healthy

    40 lb weight loss but still not ovulating "in phase"  

    February - March 2014: bcps + follistim + trigger + TI = BFP

     Beta #1 (12dpo): 30; Beta #2 (18dpo): 500; Beta #3 (25dpo): 7,000!!! 

    1st u/s 4/16: One beautiful hb at 144 bmp 

    2nd u/s 4/29: hb at 166 bmp.  Graduated from RE!!

    TEAM PINK! 

    Baby girl arrived on Thanksgiving day weighing 7lbs 6oz and measuring 20 inches

    image 

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    image


  • Desmo35Desmo35 member
    Hugs! I am so sorry!!! I don't have any words for you but feel free to vent to your hearts content on here. Know that this a safe place for you to come to. My thoughts and prayers are with you. 
    BFP #1 6/16/2012 EDD 2/25/2013 MMC @ 7 weeks(found out at 10 weeks) 8/2/2012 BFP #2 2/8/2013 EDD 10/25/2013 Beta #1 56 Beta #2 62 Beta #3 156 Beta #4 665 Beta #5 1091 Blighted Ovum 2/27/2013
  • I'm so sorry. I know exactly how that feels. My younger brother was married last July and are expecting their first baby in October. Hugs!!!
    "Everything will be alright in the end. So if it's not alright, it is not yet the end."
    Me:29 DH:29  TTC since 1/11 Dx: unexplained IF/early DOR/immune issues 
    Feb'12- July'12-testing(all clear minus slight arcuate ute), 3 IUI with clomid all BFN
    8/30IVF#1 Antagonist protocol- ER 9/11-8R, 7M, 5F. 
    ET 9/14 2 embies transferred. 1 10cell Grade 4, 1 8cell Grade 4. No frosties. BFN
    IVF#2 Antagonist protocol plus baby aspirin- ER 12/5-16R, 12M, 8F!
    ET 12/10 5dt! 1 fully expanded blast & 1 early blast. No frosties. BFN
    3/13 hysteroscopy & polypectomy, Consulted w Dr. Kwak-Kim.  
    DX: High NK cells, cytokines, DHEAs& PAI1;  hypothyroid, +APA, restricted bloodflow
    7/13 IVF#3 Long lupron protocol with PIO, Crinone, Prometrium, and vivelle
    (plus synthroid, metformin, baby asa, metanx, PNV, Vit E, D, calcium, fish oil, CoQ10, IVIg infusions and lovenox per Dr. Kwak-kim)
    ER 7/19 14R, 11M, 9F(4 natural fert, 5 with ICSI)
    ET 5dt 7/24 2 fully expanded blasts.  SURPRISE 3 FROSTIES!!!
    Beta #1 8/2 335!!!! Beta #2 829!!!  1st u/s 8/14 showed TWINS!!!!!
    11/11: TEAM PURPLE!!!!!
    3/21/14-L&W born at 37w via csection

    Here Comes the Sun Blog
    PAIF/SAIF welcome!
  • I am so sorry you have to go through that...it just isn't fair.

     

     

     

     Married since 2005. TTC since August 2011. Dx: Unexplained. Bloodwork, HSG, and DH testing all good. 4 unsuccesful rounds of Clomid. 4 unsuccesful rounds of Follistim + IUI.

    Married since 2005. TTC since August 2011. Dx: Unexplained / Endometriosis. Age: Me, 28 and DH, 28
    March - July 2012: Clomid
    October & November 2012: Follistim + IUI #1 & 2
    February & March 2013: Follistim + IUI #3 & 4
    May 2013: Laparoscopy completed. Stage 3 endometriosis removed.
    August & Sept 2013: Follistim + IUI #5 & #6

    November 2013: IVF, transferred 1= 1st ever BFP! EDD 8/10/2014


    BabyFruit Ticker}
  • That is horrible. I'm so sorry for your terrible night. Trying to out do a sibling is a ridiculous reason to bring a child into the world. UGH I'm frustrated for you because I know how I would feel.
             *********************************************************************************
                      

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    Married October 2009. Me 29 H 28.
    After 1 year of infertility, our little miracle was conceived via our 3rd IUI on May 5, 2013.
    Holland Sophia was born Jan 24, 2014.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Oh, Niffie... I am so sorry--that is terrible! Some people need to be punched. In the throat. Excessively.
    Actively TTC since 01/11
    Me: 06/12 Dx w/ IR PCOS (rx 2000 metformin) DH: SA all clear; looking good
    06/12-10/12- Clomid/Femara + trigger + TI + P4 = 3 BFNs, hysteroscopy, polypectomy, D&C
    11/12 - 7.5 mg Femara + trigger + IUI + P4 = BFN
    12/12 - Surprise BFP ectopic (MTX 01/13)
    04/13 - Off the Bench! 7.5 mg Femara + trigger + IUI #2 + estradiol + P4 = BFN
    05/13 Clear HSG-5 mg Femara + Menopur + trigger + IUI #3 + P4 = BFP ectopic (MTX 07/03 & 07/11)
    07/23 emergency lap to remove ectopic mass and left tube
    10/13 5mg Femara + Menopur + trigger + TI(follie on left/no IUI)=BFN
    11/13 Same as above but BFP!
    Beta #1 12dpo-51     Beta #2 15dpo-178
    12/5- There's something in my ute!!
    Keaton Alexander is here 07/24/2014 !!
  • I"m so sorry! ((HUGS)) all around! I wish I could make your pain go away, because I know that deep pain you feel. We are here for you!

    Me: 34 - Hydrosalpinx DH: 33
    Previous history
    IUI switched to TI x6 = BFN
    IUI x2 = BFN
    Essure procedure for hydro

    New starts

    *Possibly starting clomid in Sept or Oct 

  • I am so so sorry. Please be as nice to yourself and treat yourself to something wonderful.
    Me- 35 Dx endo; DH- 33 no probs.
    BFP#1 (totally a wonderful surprise)- 3/10/11. IUFD 6/25/11. 
    TTC since 8/2011.
    BFP#2- 11/1/11. EDD 7/6/12. Blighted ovum 12/1/11.

    New OBGYN 12/2012- CD3 labs, SA, HSG normal. 
    First RE appt 1/16/2013. Unexplained infertility. Lap planned. 

    12/2012- Clomid 50mg + TI= BFN 
    1/2013- Clomid 50mg + TI= BFN.

     Lap 2/11/2013- Removed endo. 

    3/2013- Clomid + IUI= BFN
    4/2013- Clomid + IUI= BFN
    5/2013- Clomid + IUI= BFN

    June 2013- Time for a new RE!

    July 2013- We're in Shared Risk! Love my new RE!
    August 2013- IVF#1- 14 R, 11F, transferred 1 perfect blast, 5 day 5 frosties= BFN.
    Sept 2013- Let's get ready for FET October 7th ish!< transfer 2 embies 10/11/13.......BFP 10/18/13!!!!/div>

    PAIF/SAIF and everyone is welcome. If I can make even one person's journey less painful, I will consider my experience here successful. Thank you to all for sharing their stories, the intimate details of their lives, their knowledge, and their hearts. I hope this experience changes me, always for the better.
  • RunCC37RunCC37 member
    Oh, I am so, so sorry! My heart goes out to you. Sending lots of hugs.
    **SIGGY WARNING**

    Me: 32 DH: 35  TTC#1 since March 2012
    Dx: Poor Embryo Quality, Arcuate Uterus, Poor Uterine Blood Flow, Mild Endo, 
           Protein S Deficiency, Sjorgen's Syndrome 

    IUI #1-5: BFN
    Laparoscopy & Hysteroscopy: minimal endo, partial septoplasty
    IVF #1: 10R/6M/6F ~ Day 3 ET = BFN
    IVF #2: 14R/9M/5F ~ transfer canceled ~ all embryos arrested at 1-2 cell stage
    IVF #3: 9R/5M/5F ~ 1 frosty!
    IVF #4 (FET #1): BFN

    IVF #5 (DE IVF #1 with Dr. KK protocol): Currently PREGNANT!!!!!!
    Synthroid + Prednisone + Metformin + Baby Aspirin + Supplements Galore = 15+ pills a day
    Lupron + Lovenox + Delestrogen + IVIG + B/W = 2-5 pokes a day
    19R, 17M, 17F - transferred two Grade A blasts 11/16, four frosties!!!
    Beta #1 11/24 (13dpo/8dp5dt) = 367 ~ Beta #2 11/26 (15dpo/10dp5dt) = 709
    Beta #3 11/29 (18dpo/13dp5dt) = 1,997 ~ Beta #4 12/1 (20dpo/15dp5dt) = 3,403

    imageimageimage

    My Blog: Running and Dreaming for Two ~ All are Welcome!
  • I am so sorry!!!!! That was a strong thing to do, walking away and not exploding [like I might have done]. Drink wine. Wine helps.
    image

    Anniversary

  • rox825rox825 member
    That sounds tough, I'm so sorry.

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    TTC since Sept 2011, Unexplained IF
    Oct 12 - Jan 14: 3 clomid/TI cycles, 2 hysteroscopies, 2 IUIs, 1 BFP (MMC @ 12w), 2 more IUIs
    Feb 14: Gonal-f + IUI #5 = BFP! (EDD 11/4/14)
    Baby boy arrived 11/13/14!

  • ena724ena724 member
    I'm sure that was hard news to hear. Many ((hugs))!!!
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  • I'm sorry.  I feel so sad that you had to hear such news....the timing was just not ideal and the circumstances just seem so unreal.  I still have faith that this could be your cycle too!  Stay positive today and do something for yourself.  Set a mini goal and go after it!  Your journey is just as important and the grace with which you handled yourself really proves your strength and maturity.  Remember that today if you ever find yourself doubting.

    ************** Siggy Warning************


    Married August 2012 -- Me (40 yrs old) My husband (45 yrs. old) 

    RE referral from ObGYN in late Jan. 2013 -- Testing Confirms Unexplained IF 

    IUI #"s1 - 3 (Femara + IUI) April - June 2013 - all BFN

      Decided to do IVF... Began stimming on September 10th!  Egg Retrieval 9/20/13.  19 eggs: 6 to mature to freeze after 6 fertilized with ICSI

     3 morula stage embryos transferred on 9/25/13.....Beta #1 on 10/4/13/ = 7.5  Beta #2 on 10/6/13 =  negative

      IVF#2 - Lupron plan  (set to begin on 10/28/13)  (Planning on thawing and fertilizing our 6 eggs with ICSI as well as all of the mature eggs they retrieve with this fresh cycle.)

     Late October 2013 - ectopic pregnancy - methotrexate injection....benched 3 months

    CD1 - 12/5/13...Lupron set to start on 12/26/13; CD1 - 1/2/14....Baseline 1/3/14....begin follistim tonight and continue with lupron.  (Got my calendar today!  IVF#2 is a go!)

    ER = 1/14/14  (11 eggs....9 were mature. 9 fertilized.  Of the 6 mature eggs we thawed, only 4 fertilized.  At this time, we have 13 eggs fertilized and growing.  Waiting for news about a 3-day or 5-day transfer.)

    ET = 1/19/14  (5dt).....3 blastocysts transferred!   (All nine embryos didn't make it to freeze.  =(  )

    Beta #1 = 1/28/14   (2 weeks after ER)  BFP! 209 (9dp5dt)   EDD 10/7/14

    Beta #2 - 1/30/14  (11 dp5dt) 302

    Beta #3 - 2/3/14  (15 dp5dt)  1222 

    Ultrasound set for 2/17/14......TWINS!        Twin A - HR 124 bpm; Twin B - HR 126 bpm

    Final Ultrasound with RE 3/10/14 - Twin A - HR 176 bpm; Twin B - HR 177 bpm.

     PAIF/SAIF Welcome! 

     

     

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  • I'm so sorry you have to deal with this.  Sending lots of hugs your way.
                        imageimage

                    image  imageimage
                      imageimage
      

    TTC #1 since November 2011
    Dx: Unexplained Infertility, probable endometriosis
    Feb-April 2013: Femara + TI: BFN
    May - September 2013:  Follistim + Ovidrel + IUI#1-4 = BFN
    IVF # 1 November 2013: transferred 1 perfect blast = BFN
    IVF # 2 April 2014: Endo scrape, transferred 2 blasts = BFP!! (first ever!), CP
    FET #1 June 2014: transferred 2 blasts = BFFN
    New Dx: Repeat Implantation Failure
     IVF # 3 November 2014 = BFP!!  Beta #1 9dp5t 272  Beta # 2 11dp5dt 626
    It's Twins! 
    *everyone welcome*
  • EIK2013EIK2013 member

    Ugh, my eyes just well-up with tears thinking about this scenario.... I am so so so sorry.... There really are no words that make this situation feel better....but, time heals all wounds. I couldn't even imagine this situation. I am so sorry and lots and LOTS of (((HUGS))) your way and I know it's hard, but don't give up on this cycle, it's not over yet. 

    Me: 27, DH: 29*** TTC since November 2011 *** Dx with PCOS in September 2012 
    ***September 2012: IUI #1 = BFN*** 
     ***October 2012: IUI #2 = cancelled due to not responding to meds ***
     ***February 2013: IUI #3 - BFN ***
     *** April 2013: Gonal-f, HCG Trigger and TI = BFN*** 
     ***May/June 2013: TAKING A BREAK.***
    ***July 2013: Gonal-f, Trigger and TI = BFN***
    ***August 2013: Gonal-f, Trigger and TI = Cancelled due to over-stimulating***
    ***September/October 2013: Fermara, Gonal-f, Trigger and TI = BFP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Beta #1: 65, Beta #2: 210!!!!!!***




    BabyFruit Ticker
  • imageIntuitiveBlue:

    Take the time you need to grieve right now - cry without guilt, drink without guilt, heck, even go shopping.  Buy yourself something nice.  Do what you need to take care of yourself right now.

    But do trust me that it gets easier.  If you need to talk, PM me and I'll happily send you my cell number. 

    I'll say an extra prayer for you, your husband, your family, and yes, even your sister. 

    Cut it down to save space..

    You are a gem IB!

    OP, I'm sorry you are having to deal with this. Hugs to you dear.

    siggy warning

    image

    Anniversary

    Me:29 DH:30
    TTC since 10/11
    HSG, BW, Ultrasound, SA, Genetic testing, Karyotype - all normal
    DX - Unexplained IF
    3/13-9/13 - 2 Clomid IUIs & 3 Injectable IUIs - All BFN
    Cycle 25 - IVF w/ antagonist protocol - ER 11/18 (11R, 9F) - ET 11/23 (1 "good" early blast) - none left to freeze - BFN
    Cycle 26 - IVF w/ antagonist protocol  - ER 1/17 (12R, 11M, 8 F) - ET 1/22 (2 "good" expanded blasts) 
    2 frosties - Beta 2/4 - BFP! 2104, 2/7 -  4780, ultrasound 2/12 - holy shiz, there are 2!
    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
  • Uhhh that is terrible.  If my little sister calls me up and says she is preg I will loose it.  Take a deep breathe and collect your thoughts.  Your time will come!
    ***SIGGY WARNING***

    DX: Unexplained
    6 Failed IUIs (Clomid and Gonal F).  
    IVF #1 began August 2013- BC, 4 days of Estrace, stimmed with Gonal F and Menopur, Ganirelix, 9R 5M 5F, Medrol and Doxycycline, 5 day transfer of 2 early blastocysts- good quality, Progesterone, Estrace, and baby aspirin, BETA on 9/20 BFN,   IVF #2 began September 2013, stimming with Gonal F (higher dose) and Menopur, Ganirelix, 18R 14M 9F with ICSI, 5 day transfer of 2 BBs one was starting to hatch, 2 frosties: 1  BB and 1 AC, BETA on 10/21, BFN BETA was a 5- chemical 
    Getting some more testing and trying to figure out what the issue is before FET in December, started acupuncture on 11/10, RLP and some other BW nothing major to report except slightly high Prolactin. Prolactin was slightly high when I started with my RE and I already had an MRI which was Neg.  Endo biopsy=negative.  WTF is wrong with us???
    12/18/13 FET of 1 BB and 1 AC.  Hoping for a miracle.  Beta 12/26 Low BETA-8 2nd BETA 5- chemical
    After 3 failed transfers IDK where to go from here.  Still no real answers as to why this isn't working.  Getting a second opinion in February and looking into immune testing.  
    2/14- NEW RE- Immune testing showed a partial dq alpha match with DH- On prednisone and did intralipids prior to transfer.  3/14 Lupron, gonal f, menopur, HGH.  ER 15 mature all 15 fertilized!  5dt of an early blast grade 1 and an expanded blast grade 2.  BETA on 4/21.  1 grade 2 embryo frozen
    BETA #1 59 BETA #2 148 BETA #3 283 BETA #4 2,783! US at 6w2d shows 1 bean measuring right on track! HR 121.  US at 8w3d measuring on track HR 177. Released form my RE.  EDD 12/28


    All Welcome
  • I am so sorry. ((HUGS))

    ** After  2 1/2 years of Unexplained IF, 2 failed medicated cycles, and 4 failed IUI's - our baby girl came to us through the miracle of
     Mini IVF! **

     image
    image
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