Ferber advice

littlebean4 · May 2013

Let me preface by saying that I know our babies in this birth club are too young, but I'm looking for advice from STM's.

So LO is 3 and a half months and were going to start sleep training at 5 months. My husbands a teacher and that's when school gets out we currently rock/shush her to sleep. We've tried drowsy but awake with no luck and Im obviously not going to let her CIO yet. I'm thinking of Ferber training. People who have had luck, please tell me how? Did you modify at all, pick them up, etc? People who didnt and chose a different method, how did you get your LO's to fall asleep and at what ages? Thanks so much!

ashlena · May 2013

My LO is 4 months old this week. She was swaddled in a halo swaddle (the hardcore one with the wings that crossed her body) she had to be swaddled due to her hardcore startled reflex! She was sleeping in a rock n play in our room.

Last week we noticed that her sleeping was awful, she would grunt and grunt all night and always try to break out of her swaddle. After much research I decided on getting the Magic Sleep Suit- I read about it online as a transition from the swaddle.

This weekend we put her in the crib in the sleep suit and it WORKED! No more grunting for hours on end. We did however decide to let her cry for 5 mins before we went in to soothe her. After crying for 3 mins she started to self soothe by using her hands which she could never do before swaddle.

I guess my point is that she was ready for the crib a while ago and we were not. If she cries at night and its not feeding time yet we let her CIO for 5 mins then go in. That normally does the trick. However if she cries again after that we wait 7 mins- ugh longest 7 mins of my life. After that she was out for the count! I did NOT pick her up though. I would go in and say in a low tone "its ok mommy is here your ok its time my sleep my love" and she would never really open her eyes but just take a sigh knowing I was there. I don't mind doing this for a while since she does back to sleep and until she gets use to sleeping through the night more.

I know this is not the norm as I have heard some babies can cry for over an hour ;( I do NOT recommend letting them cry for more then 15mins when you do start to ST, but that's my own personal opinion- I know some gf's wait 20 mins. To each there own so whatever works best for you and what YOU feel comfortable with Hope this helps!

sbevmc09 · May 2013

We didn't sleep train, just went with DS's natural schedule. Worked just fine. We were able to put him in his crib awake by probably 9mos with no effort on our part, before then we rocked to sleep and transferred him. I don't believe that the majority of babies need to be taught how to sleep, but I do think they need to be given the opportunity to sleep how they need.

Wild_flower25 · May 2013

I agree, going to bed drowsy but awake takes time and comes with age. But its a good time to at least start trying.

DD won't let me rock her much anymore, she squirms and fights, so I have no choice really put to put her in her crib awake. She'll sleep a little, then wake up and fuss/cry. I try to let her cry a minute or two before going in there. Then all I do is go in, replace the paci and she'll shut her eyes. Sometimes this is repeated over the course of a half hour but at the end, she finally puts herself to sleep. In a few months I imagine the fussing and crying part will drop off, but at least I'm helping her to do it on her own right now.

drpayne · May 2013

We did Ferber at 7 mo, pretty much by the book/no modifications. Took a few days. DS 1 has been a great night sleeper since.

ta78 · May 2013

We started Ferber at 6 or 7 months w DS. The checks didn't work for us, it just made him more worked up. So I let him CIO. It took maybe 3 days.. Less crying each night and he started going to sleep laying him down drowsy.

our biggest problem was he wanted to be rocked in his carseat. That had to stop. It also helped reduce feedings at night, he was still waking up 2 or 3 times and he only woke up once afterwards.

I understand that it's not for everyone. It is the hardest thing listening to our baby cry and cry.

jenn248 · May 2013

Our DD is 18 weeks and our ped said it was fine to try Ferber at her four month appt. We started it last weekend and it actually worked great! The first couple of times, we did have to go in at the three minute interval to soothe her (we didn't pick her up, just rubbed her tummy and head). Only once or twice did we have to go in after the five minute interval and we still haven't had to go in at the ten minute interval (knock on wood). The last few nights, we haven't had to go in at all after we put her down. She's been sleeping really well at night with it - 9 to 11 hour stretches. Nap times we still can't get more than 30 minutes of sleep out of her but she is laying in her crib, relatively content, for about 10 minutes before she falls asleep, so we are at least getting a slightly longer break than before

nicole3090 · May 2013

I haven't read any of the sleep train books yet so I am not sure if what we did falls under this method or not. But here is what we did.

We realized that he sucks on his 2 middle fingers on his left hand to soothe himself. We started swaddling him with only that hand out. Then we put him in his crib, drowsy but awake. He fussed a little for about 10 minutes, found his fingers then fell asleep. He slept through the night his first night in the crib!

So we kind of let him CIO, but it wasn't a full on cry, and it only lasted for like 10 minutes. We also stopped going into his room when he wakes up throughout the night until he is fully crying. He usually falls back to sleep on his own within 20 minutes. We got lucky with him self soothing I guess. But I fully intend to continue the CIO method with him, even if he stops going down so easily.

Oh, and DS is 3 and a half months old.

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