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Pregnant after 35
Kelz42
member
Pregnant at 42.*Surprise!*
Kelz42
member
Hi ladies, just joined here and am looking for a bit of encouragement. I am the very proud Mother of a 20 y/o daughter and a 17 y/o son. I live in a smallish town where most of the people know eachother (and eachothers business!) I am noticeably pregnant with my 3rd child and I am tired of the "OMG how old are you now?!" questions. And the, "You should be waiting for a grandchild, not having another of your own." Ahhh...the joys of being old and pregnant. If anyone has a "Good for you!" or "You're not THAT old" for me, It'd be very much appreciated and taken to heart. Bless 
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Re: Pregnant at 42.*Surprise!*
::hug::
Iris born Halloween 2013! 6 lbs, 1 oz, 18 inches long
The world is full of insensitive and rude people who can be downright ignorant. Don't let them steal your joy! Congrats and hope everything goes smoothly the remainder of your pg!
First of all, Congratuations for such a wonderful blessing to add to your family...
It is a shame that some people do not have the ability to take a moment to think and consider how an ignorant statement might make someone feel hurt or uncomfortable, people only draw from their experiences that they grew up with and what was acceptable at that time. I don't think they mean to truly hurt you, just drawing from surprise to what would have been considered late back in their days and what would have been said to them, but that is not an excuse for them to open their mouth and say these type of things. Children are a beautiful blessing that God places in our lives. So, just try to remember that simple message that you have a blessing to add to your family and nothing else.
Thanks for sharing your story, you give me hope. I am 43 and do not have children. I have been TTC for over 6 years....I guess those people in your town would consider me ancient! What a taboo..... Lol.
I am just lurking....
BUT, I think that is incredibly rude, and I think you are not too old at all! GL on a very healthy pregnancy!
Ticker/Siggy Warning: Children and losses mentioned
TTC #1 since 7/2011
ME: 37 DH: 38
SA-12/28/11-normal
HSG-1/16/12-possible blocked left tube
BFP#1---CP 7/9/12
Hysteroscopy-8/9/12-blocked left tube for sure, proceeding with IUI#1
IUI#1 (Gonal-F + trigger)=BFP#2 m/c @ 19w1d D&E 1/23/13
IUI #2 (Gonal F + trigger)=BFP#3 EDD 1/6/14 TWINS!!!
Identical girls born 11/17/13
BFP#4 EDD 8/27/15 MMC at 7w6d
BFP#5 m/c at 6w
BFP#6 EDD 10/5/16 Going Strong! It's a Girl!
Congrats on your pregnancy!
I'm getting some of the same comments. My oldest is 19, so I get a lot about "starting over" and "how old are you" etc. What probably offends me the most is people asking if this was planned (this is actually the only kid I have that WAS planned! oh the irony).
I just smile and brush it off. I'm on cloud nine about this baby and don't care what anyone thinks. It probably helps that I'm also getting a lot of positive comments in addition to the negative and rude ones.
I had my first when I was 38 and my second is due two weeks after I turn 40. I am way more prepared now than I would have been in my 20s. I cant believe things people say
Congratulations! Oh my gosh, you're definitely not too old to be having a baby. I'm going to deliver my first at 40 and maybe it's the living in a smallish town as opposed to a larger city because I haven't had one person comment about my age. Maybe they do it behind my back.
My OB is exactly my age and just had her 3rd child. We're constantly joking about our "advanced maternal ages". I was reading somewhere on the bump about responses to rude comments and questions. They're pretty good. This is a good one that may work for you:
?Are you sure you should be having another baby?? to which the suggested response is:
?Are you sure you should be asking such a rude question??
https://pregnant.thebump.com/pregnancy/third-trimester/articles/worst-things-to-say-to-pregnant-women.aspx
Anyway, good luck and congratulations!
You are not too old! My mom had my brother at 42.... He was such a much better kid to raise than my sister and I :: smiles:: she did say it took it took longer to bounce back, but he's been worth it!
Small towns tend to be churchy, tell them you must be just the right age and time in your life because God sent you this one to watch close! I hope your kiddos are excited, sis n I were shocked, and then excited, and it all worked out beautifully....
Congratulations!
Congratulations! As long as you're happy and excited, who cares what some small minded, thoughtless, or rude folks have to say?
I'm 41 and have a 22 year old daughter and 17 year old son. I've heard everything from, "Are you sure you want to do this?" to "How old are you/your kids?" to "Wow, starting over, huh?" to my favorite: " Better you than me."
I think to myself, "Yes, it is better that someone who wants and is able to care for a child is having one than someone who would consider him an accident or worse, a burden."
So, as difficult as it sometimes is, ignore the rude remarks and try to focus on the miracle and blessing that pregnancy at our age is.
Good luck!
I'm 43 with a 15 year old daughter and just found out yesterday that we're pregnant again. We had just talked about H getting snipped and this "surprise" happened before he could make an appointment.
We're in a fairly small town too, so I totally understand what you're saying.
Happy to find you all!