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October 2012 Moms
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Had to share

BabyCarryingVesselBabyCarryingVessel member
in October 2012 Moms

I saw an acquaintance last week at a birthday party. She's about 25 weeks pregnant with her first baby and I've always thought her husband is sort of weird. He's sort of childish, parties a lot, can't hold a job, gambles, drugs, etc. Whatever shred of respect I may have had for him is totally gone now! She told me that her husband will not be in the delivery room because "he can't stand to see her in pain." She said she is perfectly fine with it, so to each their own. BUT how can any woman be perfectly fine with it? I understand circumstances keep dads away sometimes, but a husband not being there because it's too hard for him to watch? Ouch. I was good and didn't make any judgey comments to her face. What do you all say?  

 

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Re: Had to share

  • lady dixneuflady dixneuf member

    that is so lame. seriously, wtf.

    maybe he will change his mind.

     



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  • BabyCarryingVesselBabyCarryingVessel member
    imagelady dixneuf:

    that is so lame. seriously, wtf.

    maybe he will change his mind.

    That's what I told her. What will he do? Twiddle his thumbs at home? She kept claiming that she didn't care, but she probably will when that time comes!

     

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  • BabyCarryingVesselBabyCarryingVessel member

    imagepiffle42:
    DH kept thinking he was going to be grossed out but didn't want to miss it. He actually almost didn't make it in because the nurses were a total PITA. DD came really fast and we didn't have anyone to watch DS. Thankfully the security guy offered. DD is DHs first and I was screaming at one of the nurses that he needed to be in the room while trying not to push.

    That's crazy piffle!

     

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  • Ken&AnnaKen&Anna member

    Um... that would not fly with me!

    Although... I remember an episode of Baby Story where there was some religious reason... the dad couldn't be in the room while the mom was pushing but he could be in there for the labor leading up to pushing.  She had a MW and a Doula and her mom and sister with her.


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  • Mrs.G123Mrs.G123 member
    Unacceptable. What a DB. And a baby.
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  • AnotherPreggoAnotherPreggo member
    Wow. Because if he isn't there then she isn't in pain... Out of sight, out of mind, right?
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  • jessilynnwilliamsjessilynnwilliams member
    My DH swore up and down he wouldn't be in there with me because it was "gross".... when it came down to it, he was. In fact, he even held my puke bucket. LOL. Hopefully her hubby is the same way and when it comes time for it he steps up!
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  • danienrossdanienross member
    That is unacceptable to me.  DH missed my second labor and delivery but he was overseas.  Had he been home you best believe he would have been right there with me.  Just like he was with our first.
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  • BabyCarryingVesselBabyCarryingVessel member

    imagedanienross:
    That is unacceptable to me.  DH missed my second labor and delivery but he was overseas.  Had he been home you best believe he would have been right there with me.  Just like he was with our first.

    Danienross, I was actually thinking about you when I wrote this post because I knew your DH couldn't be with you. I'll bet he was really sad to miss it!

     

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  • cardiganmomcardiganmom member
    I think that's ridiculous. The woman has to go through so much, the least the man can do is be there for support. Hopefully he changes his mind. I can't imagine my husband not being there while in labor and delivery, it was such a personal experience, I wouldn't want anyone else there. Plus, I would think as the father, it has to be amazing to finally feel like your a dad the moment the baby is born. 
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  • Annie FrannieAnnie Frannie member

    This makes me mad, because he's being incredibly selfish by putting his own needs ahead of his wife's. i think your first assessment of the guy was probably right on. Hopefully she kicks him to the side and gets on with her life with a man instead of a boy.

    Wow. A lot of this is coming from a personal experience, if you couldn't tell. I have no time for selfish jerks (anymore). 

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