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February 2012 Moms
It just gets harder!
Sorry in advance if this tunrs into a diary entry
I've been thinking, you always hear how life changes with a newborn. Everyone goes on and on about how hard it is to adjust to baby. But to me it is just getting harder as he gets older. The new born stage, parenting was a breeze. It just kind of fit. The bigger and more independant he gets, the harder parenting gets. I have more questions than answers as things move forward. At the beginning my biggest (parenting) worries were if he was eating enough, and what formula (and for me it was "oh the horror! Formula!"), and changing diapers. Now I need to worry about DS learning right from wrong, and learning to be gentle, and kind, learning how to socialize... it is terrifying. I absolutely love it, but it scares me so badly. I feel like nobody ever prepares you for what comes after the newborn phase. It is so much harder, though so much more rewarding.
What have you found to be the hardest part of parenting so far?
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Re: It just gets harder!
for me the hard part is knowing when I'm creating bad habits. Lik, in my head, Allison is 14 months old so it is ok to give her the pacifier, hold her when she cries, give her a snack if she didn't finish her dinner...but when does that become the rule, not the exception? How do I know when she is already learning as opposed to just going with the flow? When I tell her no and try to tell her WHY I'm saying no, when will she get it?
That is the hard part to me. The timing and knowing when they are "ready" for certain things.
Gosh you make me feel like I'm doing something wrong. I don't feel like it's harder I think it's better. I am really loving this age. He can feed himself, hold his own bottle, kinda tell me what he needs. Sleeps through the night.
I think the newborn stage was way tougher than this. I was exhausted, had PPD, he was colicky, etc.
The hard part is the tantrums. I walk away but when he does them in public, it's really embarassing.
I would agree that the newborn stage was tougher physically for me with the sleep deprivation and all...but I think PARENTING is harder now that they have the ability to "fight" back (for lack of a better word). Now that Allison's personality is coming through I'm finding it harder to actually parent her as opposed to just taking care of her.
I think it is all just getting more difficult! L is beyond opinionated on every little thing and it is exhausting. I feel like we can't have fun anymore because I am trying to establish rules and he is just bending and breaking them all day! I can't even keep track of how many times the word No or Please use your inside voice is said every day.
The part I am most struggling with is the tantrums and him yelling (for fun or frustration). He is just full of energy and his own ideas and we have yet to find a balance that works for us both. I still feel like he is too young for full on discipline but he is slowly becoming that out of control child that I dreaded having!
I agree.
DS has been really picky with food the last few weeks. DH/I feel it's too early to make him eat what we make or go to bed hungry (plus he's only 15% for weight). But when is he old enough to enforce that rule? I don't want a 3, 4, 5yr old that will only eat chicken nuggets and mac n cheese, because I am not making 2 meals every night- I hate just making one! But I don't know where that "point" on the time-line is?
This for us too. L is on the move all day, won't sit still. I feel like all I say all day is "No", "Don't touch that", "No hitting", "No kicking", "Stop"... And he will look me in the face and laugh when I say "No". Moving him or taking something away= full on meltdown, screaming/crying, jumping up and down, or kicking tantrum. But time-out won't be effective for another year or so? What?
I already feel like I am getting the "mean parent" rep since I am saying "No" etc. all day and DH isn't, so when DH is around, DS prefers him over me.
THIS!!!!
I think each stage has it's own challenges and rewards. The hardest time we've gone through was right around the time DD turned 3. Her behavior was the WORST and if I'm being honest I would say I didn't want to be around her. Like...at all. Constant tantrums, refusal to do anything we asked, enough cognitive/language development to argue with everything, etc. It was exhausting. Age 4 has been a breath of fresh air! But of course we have new challenges, like her asking some "hard questions", teaching her right from wrong, dealing with lying, etc. But she's also so funny and creative, and tells me the greatest stories. We really have a lot of fun together and laugh a lot.
Toddlerhood is no-joke hard though!
Some things especially on here are over thought a bit.