Tell me this is normal

Sarmouse · May 2013

I am a long time lurker but have been frustrated lately after a recent pedi visit and talking to other moms. My son is 4 months and is EBF. Everyone talks about how their babies put themselves to sleep and are sleeping through the night. DS is nowhere close to this! He does give us a good stretch at the beginning usually down around 7:30 (he chose this time and we have tried to keep him up later but he gets overtired) and sleeps until 12 or 2am. Then after that he is usually up every 2 hours to eat and awake for the day at 6:30 to 7. He also doesn't nap the best - usually less than an hour at a time.

Then yesterday at his 4 month pedi visit we didn't see our normal pedis but saw another doctor in the practice. She said oh he weighs 15pounds he should be sleeping through the night and when I said he wasn't she was surprised. She suggested a dream feed at 10 but I don't know how I feel about that.

As a FTM I'm worried I'm not doing something right and we are never going to have a good nights sleep! I also want to establish good habits for him so he can fall asleep on his own?

this decaf life · May 2013

Our pedi also said it's unusual that DD doesn't STTN but I'm not too worried yet. She still wakes up a lot but we just started the No-Cry sleep solution to try and shorten the amount of time she's up for each feeding so hopefully she starts finding them less helpful and decides to sleep through some of her wakings!

Good luck, it's tough getting up so much for so long!

caseylynw · May 2013

DS is the same as your LO. Short cat naps during the day, one long stretch in the beginning of the night and then up every few hours the rest of the night. But I really don't expect him to ever sleep through the night. I personally wake up at least twice on my own every night and have been this way since I was an infant (according to my mother)

Sarmouse · May 2013

Thank you all! This is all some good advice. I think I will give the dream feed a try and maybe try shortening the time he stays on the breast in the middle of the night and see if that works. My biggest hurdle is the "put down drowsy but awake" concept. Every once in a while he will fuss and then sleep but most of the time it makes him more awake and he screams until I pick him up (I feel like his too young to CIO).

bstengler · May 2013

mj0011:
I was skeptical of the dreamfeed too but it works for us. LO falls asleep around 8, I dreamfeed between 10 and 11 he sleeps until 5 I feed and change him and he sleeps until 8 or 830. My advice is to give the dreamfeed a try!

i would try the dreamfeed, our pedi brought it up to us as well and we did it a few times and LO now will sleep from 1030-7ish. its worth the try i think!! i hope it works for you or you find something that does work!

Allycat11 · May 2013

DD is smaller than your son but she isn't STTN yet either. She sleeps for about 5-6 hours at first (sometimes less) then is up every 2-3 hours for the rest of the night. After a total of 10-12 hours she is up for the day.

drpayne · May 2013

Don't beat yourself up. All of those books on baby sleep and sleep training methods wouldn't exist if they all magically started STTN at the same time! DS1 didn't STTN until we did Ferber at 7 mo. This one isn't even close aside from random long stretches.

dulcemariamar1 · May 2013

Sarmouse:
Thank you all! This is all some good advice. I think I will give the dream feed a try and maybe try shortening the time he stays on the breast in the middle of the night and see if that works. My biggest hurdle is the "put down drowsy but awake" concept. Every once in a while he will fuss and then sleep but most of the time it makes him more awake and he screams until I pick him up (I feel like his too young to CIO).

Do you nurse to sleep?

I do this and the last two weeks I have to wake my baby up a bit before transfering her to the crib because sh started to wake up after each sleep cycle. The whole drowsy but awake thing doesnt work with us. I think for the most part our LOs are still too young for that.

Also I found that if I fed her more during the day she slept longer at night.

Menig2012 · May 2013

Have u tried putting him to sleep 1/2 hour earlier? Maybe baby is over tired by 7:30.

GMH1183 · May 2013

Some babies and kids just aren't good sleepers. My two year old only sleeps through the night about half the time. We tried everything with him, Ferber, no cry sleep solution, CIO, etc. nothing worked. He would just get hysterical but never fall asleep. That's just how it is for some kids and it is totally normal. Now this baby I can put down drowsy but awake at bedtime and after motn feedings. She's just a different kid. Don't let what other people's babies do make you feel bad.

Sarmouse · May 2013

dulcemariamar1:
Sarmouse:
Thank you all! This is all some good advice. I think I will give the dream feed a try and maybe try shortening the time he stays on the breast in the middle of the night and see if that works. My biggest hurdle is the "put down drowsy but awake" concept. Every once in a while he will fuss and then sleep but most of the time it makes him more awake and he screams until I pick him up (I feel like his too young to CIO).

Do you nurse to sleep?

I do this and the last two weeks I have to wake my baby up a bit before transfering her to the crib because sh started to wake up after each sleep cycle. The whole drowsy but awake thing doesnt work with us. I think for the most part our LOs are still too young for that.

Also I found that if I fed her more during the day she slept longer at night.

Yes, I have been nursing to sleep. Last night I tried to wake him slightly and did where his eyes were open when I put him in the crib. I also then tried the dream feed at 10:30 but it didn't seem to help. He still woke up at 2 and then 5:30 but slept until 8 when he is usually up at 6:30 to 7. We will try all this again tonight and see what happens.

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