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Partial AP?

spainy17spainy17 member
in Attachment Parenting

In your opinion can a baby do okay with a partial AP style?  I am very in-tune to my DD's needs, respond to her cries right away, etc.  My DH (and our caregivers while I am at work) are way less so (my DH and his mom are big believers in letting a baby cry first and daycare I am assuming DD will end up crying more due to them being more busy with multiple children).  I end up feeling sick about it and worry about how DD feels, yet I cannot change how much or how quickly people respond to her when I am not there.  How do you deal with this?  I try and cuddle her more and be extra loving before and after I am at work to compensate and she seems ok but I just keep thinking that it will negatively affect her. 

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Re: Partial AP?

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    salt78salt78 member

    I don't think AP is all or nothing, so I don't see why she wouldn't be okay. There are certain things that we do that are very AP and other things that aren't. Plenty of children come from non-AP families that turn out just fine. It's just your preferred parenting choice and it is not better or worse than what anyone else does. (Extreme cases notwithstanding obviously.)


    A baby is not going to be negatively affected by crying for a couple minutes.

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    ILoveRunningILoveRunning member

    I agree with PP regarding daycare.  Particularly if your LO is going to be in a center or home DC where there are other children.  My LOs DC had a foster grandma who would often rock him to sleep.  And to this day, they still pat his back.  In fact, yesterday before his bedtime he made me pretend to be him while he patted me on my back like he was the teacher.  It was too cute.

    As far as family, you and your H need to get on the same page.  Your MIL should do whatever you say.  It is not her child to raise.

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    Ardmhs83Ardmhs83 member
    imagesalt78:

    I don't think AP is all or nothing, so I don't see why she wouldn't be okay. There are certain things that we do that are very AP and other things that aren't. Plenty of children come from non-AP families that turn out just fine. It's just your preferred parenting choice and it is not better or worse than what anyone else does. (Extreme cases notwithstanding obviously.)


    A baby is not going to be negatively affected by crying for a couple minutes.

    Totally agree with this!  I am more AP than my DH and that is OK.  I do/did a lot of things that people call "AP."  I EBF, co-slept for a little while and wore my son a lot.  We try to tend to him as best as we can and try to use time-outs as a last resort.  However, we did "Ferberize" my DS at 5 months old too.  So I don't think it is all or nothing and I think your DD will be just fine! Smile

    You have to do what is best for your family.  My son is a happy, healthy, growing toddler! :-)

    PPD/PPA Mom...it has been super hard, but I'm making it! Slow steps...
    Mom to Carter (6), and Calianne (1).  
    Proud VBAC, natural birth, breastfeeding, cloth diapering momma!


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