One & Done: Only child

Friends with New Babies

Over the last 24 hours, I had one friend announce her second pregnancy (she is 12 weeks along), and her first was just born in August 2012.  A second friend had twins last night, and they are her third and fourth children.

I love each of these friends dearly and they are great moms, but I am overwhelmed just thinking about each of their situations.  Another sign that OAD is for me!  

Re: Friends with New Babies

  • There are times that I feel a lot of conflict about being OAD.  Then there are times where I see what people around me deal with (esp those w/ 3+) and I think "Yeah, I'm really not cut out for more than one.". 

     

    "Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
    ~Benjamin Franklin

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  • salt78salt78 member

    The idea of twins makes my head hurt.

    I'm part of a mom group where everyone is all "OMG BABIES ON THE BRAIN" all the time. I don't get it.

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  • Our neighbor just had her 3rd baby.  Their oldest just turned 4 and their middle child just turned 2.  I can already sense the tension that is coming from their backyard and it makes me run around a little more carefree with my 1 toddler.

    I've mentioned this before, but having an infant was tough on our marriage.  We're fantastic now, but it it makes me more aware and sensitive to how new babies affect other couples.  I hear a lot of yelling coming over the fence and it makes me very sad.

    DS 11.24.11
    MMC 3.30.16
  • I think because L is only six months old, I kind of romantically view the toddler/little kid stage.  Part of my reason for being OAD is because this no sleep and still get up and go to work 50+ hrs (and in DH's case 70+ hrs) a week is killing us and I can't imagine going through it again.  But then I see someone with two sweet kids and think "That would be so fun if they slept through the night!"  I'm sure it isn't all rainbows and sunshine though.
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  • Definitely no babies on the brain here, and I can completely relate to the newborn stage being tough on a marriage and to the never wanting to return to the lack of sleep during that stage.  DS just started sleeping through the night about a month ago at 13 months old. 
  • OMG I can so relate. There are babies and pregnancies all around me right now, and of course all of the other moms are asking "so when are you going to have another?" I have a cousin pregnant with her second, two women at my church are pregnant with their seconds (and both their children are younger than mine!), two women in a service organization I belong to are pregnant with second and third children respectively, and another woman in the same organization just gave birth to her second child (again with her first child being younger than mine). It makes me tired just thinking about it. Stick out tongue
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  • I have a friend with kids 20 months apart. Every day that I'm not living her life is a happy day. I had absolutely no jealousy when she announced her pregnancy last year and no desire to have another one when I saw her newborn.

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  • If I could have had Irish twins, or something close to it, I would have been OK with having a second... but once LO started to sleep through the night I realized how much I suck when I am sleep deprived. I can't imagine going though that sleepless phase again if I couldn't "sleep while baby sleeps." If not for the sleeplessness, I might consider a second, but that was certainly not the only factor. And to think, before she was born I wanted 4! Psh. 3 years ago Monkeysender was crazy.
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  • ktedmonktedmon member
    My sister has 4 kids. They are 27, 23, and 22 months apart. I love them all dearly, but I get tired just babysitting them.
  • Two of my best friends are currently trying for their firsts. I keep telling DH, "I can't wait to hold a little tiny newborn again . . . and then go home and get some sleep."
  • salt78salt78 member
    image2013mommy:

    A co-worker's daughter had her two children 10 months apart. I would die. 

    That makes my uterus hurt in a bad way. 

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  • missymomissymo member
    imagesalt78:
    image2013mommy:

    A co-worker's daughter had her two children 10 months apart. I would die. 

    That makes my uterus hurt in a bad way. 

    Ditto. I just can't even imagine.  

    My little sister is thinking of TTC her second starting in 6 months...her first child is just turning 1 this month.  I can't even imagine having a toddler and a baby on purpose.  Seriously, on purpose! It's just something I can't imagine choosing to do.   


    image
    C is 3 years old

  • There are so many people around me that are pregnant or just had their babies.  I myself just had my LO 6 weeks ago.  I always thought that I wanted at least 2 but after having one I think I am done.  Between the lack of sleep and strain it has put on my relationship with my boyfriend I am not sure I want to go through it all again.
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  • I found out I was pregnant with Hannah while my dh was rocking our then 5 month old ds and giving him his nighttime bottle. I just walked out of the bathroom with the stick crying. Now looking back, we could have made it work, but my first feelings were
    panic and then fear.

    Now that we are for sure that ds is an only child, I will hold and cuddle any baby but I am darn glad to give them back. The baby urge is completely gone now.
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