He has a hard time relaxing and not over thinking during sex. One night I had my period and we don't do the deed if so. I gave him a bj, and he totally let go. He completely got into it, and it was great. I realised he was able to do that because he didn't have to think about what he should be doing, he didn't worry about anything but his own pleasure.
So I made him promise that we could do at least one bj per period, as long as he promised to feel it and not think it.
I read the title and immediately thought "Yeah we have one too" But it isn't the same lol. My husband loves to get them and I hate giving them. HATE. But I have a really really bad back and totally need deep pressure massages some times. So we have a deal, if he gives me a massage when he totally isn't feeling it...like every three massages and I'll suck it up and give him a BJ when I'm not feeling it.
I gave Dh Bj coupons before for his birthday. I wasn't expecting him to cash in on them. Shoulda put an expiration date on those damn things.
Do you watch Cougar Town? Andy gets sex coupons from his wife for his bday for years, but she said he loses them. He had saved them all and was finally cashing them in.
I will enter into no contract in which there is the promise of a blow job.
Because then I might actually be expected to give one. And I don't want to.
Yeah, this.
The less DH asks for/expects anything sexual, the more likely he is to actually get it. He's been trying to get laid the past 2 days and tonight admitted he was even annoying himself with how desperate he was acting. I was going to put out tonight but the fact that he backed off makes me more willing to do it.
Regardless...BJs are rare in our household for sure.
Am I the only one that actually likes slobbin' the nob?
I have no problem doing it, just because, for DH. I'm super confident in my BJ skills and DH loves it. I have no problem doing it and ::gasp:: not getting anything in return.
It's not scheduled, I choose the time and place. And he gets them other times too, but they always seem to end with sex, and then we are back where we started.
Also, we had sex for the first time 12 years ago, and in those 12 years he has never once asked for one. The first time I gave him one, he was almost turned off. He didn't know what to do. There is so much going on there, I don't know where to start.
Am I the only one that actually likes slobbin' the nob?
I have no problem doing it, just because, for DH. I'm super confident in my BJ skills and DH loves it. I have no problem doing it and ::gasp:: not getting anything in return.
+1
+2
You know a sure-fire way to have a great day? Give your husband a blow job in the morning.
promised myself I'd retire when I turned gold, and yet here I am
Meh. I personally don't think there is anything wrong with one person asking and acting like they want something sexual from the other person in the relationship.
And not asking for or expecting is a slippery slope.
Well, there's asking and there's relentless groping that's more of a turn off than a turn on. Asking once or twice is one thing. Acting like we haven't had sex in months when it's only been 2 days is another, especially when our kid hasn't napped and 8:00 rolls around and it's the first chance I've had to sit. All day the 2-year-old is on me all day, so starting in on wanting sex the minute I've had a chance to sit down in peace doesn't work for me!
However, tonight DH was minding his own business and doing some organizing in the house and it totally turned me on and we had really great sex. He knows my love language is acts of service and I'm more apt to want to do him after he's helped around the house vs. being felt up as I'm doing the dishes.
Am I the only one that actually likes slobbin' the nob?
I have no problem doing it, just because, for DH. I'm super confident in my BJ skills and DH loves it. I have no problem doing it and ::gasp:: not getting anything in return.
Probably if I was more efficient at it, but it takes like 20+ minutes and it's tiring. Even giving a handy takes longer than just having sex.
Am I the only one that actually likes slobbin' the nob?
I have no problem doing it, just because, for DH. I'm super confident in my BJ skills and DH loves it. I have no problem doing it and ::gasp:: not getting anything in return.
Probably if I was more efficient at it, but it takes like 20+ minutes and it's tiring. Even giving a handy takes longer than just having sex.
I can complete DH pretty quickly so I don't mind giving them but in the past I've been with guys that would take forever and yea, ain't nobody got time for that.
My sweet angels...
Baby girl grew wings 11/14/11, 20w
Baby boy grew wings 4/20/13, 16w
How does that help me have a great day? I mean look, I do it now and again, but I'd rather just have sex. Because then we both get off.
A BJ for DH before breakfast doesn't make my day great. DH telling me he's calling in sick and taking DS out for the day so I can sleep in, drink my coffee in peace, and have the house to myself for hours would make a great day. I would definitely be willing to give more BJs for that.
I'm obviously having a hard time finding reasons for frequent unconditional BJs. lol
Meh. I personally don't think there is anything wrong with one person asking and acting like they want something sexual from the other person in the relationship.
And not asking for or expecting is a slippery slope.
Well, there's asking and there's relentless groping that's more of a turn off than a turn on. Asking once or twice is one thing. Acting like we haven't had sex in months when it's only been 2 days is another, especially when our kid hasn't napped and 8:00 rolls around and it's the first chance I've had to sit. All day the 2-year-old is on me all day, so starting in on wanting sex the minute I've had a chance to sit down in peace doesn't work for me!
However, tonight DH was minding his own business and doing some organizing in the house and it totally turned me on and we had really great sex. He knows my love language is acts of service and I'm more apt to want to do him after he's helped around the house vs. being felt up as I'm doing the dishes.
I have found the key is to be Zen about sex. Being whiny is never sexy, and demanding is only sexy if she wants it as much as I do. Obviously your husband's tactics are all wrong trying to start something the first chance you have to sit. Minimally he should put the kids down and give you some peace before attacking you. There's certainly a fine line between suggesting sex and pushing too hard for it.
Of course, I freely admit one of my tactics is to feel up DW while she's doing the dishes, then leave her be. Then again, who am I kidding, my results have not been very consistent as of late.
-My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
I have found the key is to be Zen about sex. Being whiny is never sexy, and demanding is only sexy if she wants it as much as I do. Obviously your husband's tactics are all wrong trying to start something the first chance you have to sit. Minimally he should put the kids down and give you some peace before attacking you. There's certainly a fine line between suggesting sex and pushing too hard for it.
I agree! Part of the problem is DS is in a "Mommy Only" stage where only I can do his bath and bedtime routine. He'll scream if DH tries to do it and I'm home. It would help a lot if DH was able to do bedtime routine and it was a calm time for me. We also lost an hour of time to ourselves when DS pushed his bedtime back so a lot of days there are only 2 hours from wake-up until I go to bed where I don't have DS on top of me.
It also doesn't help that DH is very physical - he's the one that likes to cuddle, hold hands, etc, and I can kind of take it or leave it if I'm honest. I used to like it more but ever since birthing a kid who was attached to my boobs for a year and still can't go more than 5 minutes without wanting me to play with/read to/otherwise entertain him, I need my personal space when I can get it. If DS finishes his breakfast before I do, he's climbing in my lap at the table. Sitting on the couch watching a TV show, he has to be on top of me. I try to exercise, he's climbing on me. So I do feel bad that DH gets the shaft and I try to make the effort to cuddle/whatever for his sake, but at the end of the day I really just want to sit by myself for awhile.
We have a BJ pact. He gets one at least every Friday. This is a relatively new arrangement, hopefully we'll keep it up. LO interrupted us by crying 3 times lastweek, so it can be a challenge sometimes.
Am I the only one that actually likes slobbin' the nob?
I have no problem doing it, just because, for DH. I'm super confident in my BJ skills and DH loves it. I have no problem doing it and ::gasp:: not getting anything in return.
I really like doing it, too. Especially now that I have my gag reflex back under control. We had a...rather unfortunate occurrence when I was pregnant. :embarrassed mobile smiley:
Re: DH and I have a bj pact
No blow jobs? Ever?
Hmmm. I cannot imagine.
Do you get something in return???
No abcoleslaw ::??:: gets massages for head. OP didn't mention anything in return.
Haha I saw your eta riiiiiight as I quoted you
This is the same for us. Hence my decent knowledge of flavored lubes/gels.
BFP #2 11/30/09 EDD 08/12/10- Sophia Grace born 8/1/10
BFP #3 11/16/10 EDD 08/04/11- Samuel Richard born 7/28/11
BFP #4 01/04/12 EDD 09/19/12- Simon Nathaniel born 9/6/12
BFP #5 03/27/13 EDD 11/25/13- Savannah Lee born 11/18/13
Yeah, this.
The less DH asks for/expects anything sexual, the more likely he is to actually get it. He's been trying to get laid the past 2 days and tonight admitted he was even annoying himself with how desperate he was acting. I was going to put out tonight but the fact that he backed off makes me more willing to do it.
Regardless...BJs are rare in our household for sure.
I have no problem doing it, just because, for DH. I'm super confident in my BJ skills and DH loves it. I have no problem doing it and ::gasp:: not getting anything in return.
Yup
+2
You know a sure-fire way to have a great day? Give your husband a blow job in the morning.
Well, there's asking and there's relentless groping that's more of a turn off than a turn on. Asking once or twice is one thing. Acting like we haven't had sex in months when it's only been 2 days is another, especially when our kid hasn't napped and 8:00 rolls around and it's the first chance I've had to sit. All day the 2-year-old is on me all day, so starting in on wanting sex the minute I've had a chance to sit down in peace doesn't work for me!
However, tonight DH was minding his own business and doing some organizing in the house and it totally turned me on and we had really great sex. He knows my love language is acts of service and I'm more apt to want to do him after he's helped around the house vs. being felt up as I'm doing the dishes.
Probably if I was more efficient at it, but it takes like 20+ minutes and it's tiring. Even giving a handy takes longer than just having sex.
I can complete DH pretty quickly so I don't mind giving them but in the past I've been with guys that would take forever and yea, ain't nobody got time for that.
My sweet angels...
Baby girl grew wings 11/14/11, 20w
Baby boy grew wings 4/20/13, 16w
A BJ for DH before breakfast doesn't make my day great. DH telling me he's calling in sick and taking DS out for the day so I can sleep in, drink my coffee in peace, and have the house to myself for hours would make a great day. I would definitely be willing to give more BJs for that.
I'm obviously having a hard time finding reasons for frequent unconditional BJs. lol
I have found the key is to be Zen about sex. Being whiny is never sexy, and demanding is only sexy if she wants it as much as I do. Obviously your husband's tactics are all wrong trying to start something the first chance you have to sit. Minimally he should put the kids down and give you some peace before attacking you. There's certainly a fine line between suggesting sex and pushing too hard for it.
Of course, I freely admit one of my tactics is to feel up DW while she's doing the dishes, then leave her be. Then again, who am I kidding, my results have not been very consistent as of late.
I agree! Part of the problem is DS is in a "Mommy Only" stage where only I can do his bath and bedtime routine. He'll scream if DH tries to do it and I'm home. It would help a lot if DH was able to do bedtime routine and it was a calm time for me. We also lost an hour of time to ourselves when DS pushed his bedtime back so a lot of days there are only 2 hours from wake-up until I go to bed where I don't have DS on top of me.
It also doesn't help that DH is very physical - he's the one that likes to cuddle, hold hands, etc, and I can kind of take it or leave it if I'm honest. I used to like it more but ever since birthing a kid who was attached to my boobs for a year and still can't go more than 5 minutes without wanting me to play with/read to/otherwise entertain him, I need my personal space when I can get it. If DS finishes his breakfast before I do, he's climbing in my lap at the table. Sitting on the couch watching a TV show, he has to be on top of me. I try to exercise, he's climbing on me. So I do feel bad that DH gets the shaft and I try to make the effort to cuddle/whatever for his sake, but at the end of the day I really just want to sit by myself for awhile.
I really like doing it, too. Especially now that I have my gag reflex back under control. We had a...rather unfortunate occurrence when I was pregnant. :embarrassed mobile smiley: