Please tell me I'm doing the right thing

bethLenell · April 2013

I posted earlier about making life more difficult because we let DD sleep in our bed with us and now we are trying to get back to healthy sleep patterns for everyone. Well it's been 45 minutes and she is still locked in her room screaming and crying and pounding on the door. We have only gone in a few times and only because she was starting to hyperventilate and I HAD to calm her down. I feel like a really crappy mom and don't know if I can keep this up for the month or two we think it will take to get her to realize bed time is bed time.

I just don't know what to do I'm at my wits end here!!

bethLenell · April 2013

Thanks, it's just so hard to know if I am doing the right thing. I know we can't keep living like we are with her sleeping in bed with us! I am high strung, irritable, and stressed out and I know that can't be good for the baby. We are going on an hour now and the last time I went in she just tried to get out of the room to go sleep in our bed. I feel like she's going to just get worse and more clingy at bed time because of this but our staying with her till she falls asleep method just wasn't working (we have been doing it for at least 3 months that way)

ETA: Update an hour and 15 minutes in now and she is finally just sobbing quietly

Junebug060609 · April 2013

I know that she's (hopefully) long since gone to sleep, but please know that the first few days are the hardest with sleep training. I don't have experience with a kiddo her age, but what got me through those initial days was reminding myself tha the ends were worth the means. A few hard days yielded him (and me!) soooo many more nights of good sleep. Be consistent and she'll learn that this is how it is.

(((hugs))), I know it's so hard. When we Ferberized D I was crying there listening to him.

bethLenell · April 2013

She has been asleep for about 20 minutes now. Occasionally I hear a little whimper but I think she is sleeping.

pottermommy · April 2013

This was so hard with Katelyn, We bought her a lamp that projected stars on the walls and they were her "safety" stars. As long as they were on she would stay in therer. Now mind you I also had a spraybottle of purple dyed water that I would spray under beds and in closets, it is called monster away, if you add a dash of perfume it even has a scent. We had a special toy that she picked out that could only stay in her bed. It wasn't allowed out of her bed at all.

The first week is the worst. Just hold on.

orangegoggles · April 2013

No advice, just hugs!

melly918 · April 2013

I hope the rest of the night was uneventful for you. The only way this will succeed is if you continue to be consistent with your approach with her. Don't change anything! In a few days, the length of time she will cry and complain should get shorter and shorter - knock on wood! I love the idea of a light projector. My son had his crib musical box in his own bed with him until I had the baby and swapped it out with a stuffed dinosaur that projected lights. He loves it.

bethLenell · April 2013

Thanks ladies! I appreciate all your kind words. She stayed asleep until about 2:30 this morning and then I ended up staying in there with her until a little after 4 ( I think I could have left sooner but I fell asleep) Then she was up at 5:45 and wanted to be awake. I tried staying in there again but by 6:30 I gave up because DH was up for work and let the dogs out. I'm thinking about one of those sleep lights that tells them it's ok to leave the room. I don't know if they are worth it though. She has a little pillow pet that projects stars and she really likes it. She also has about 3 stuffy toys that are always with her in bed.

I know it's just a matter of time before we get it all figured out. It is so difficult, I just hope that it works fast so I don't have such mind games of being a bad mom.

bethLenell · April 2013

Oh my goodness you guys she only cried like 20 minutes tonight!! I can't believe it. I know that it could still take a while but wow!!

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