This is hard :( (just a vent)
annibes
member
I'm dumb. Last week, the girls at work were trying to convince me that we should give DS a sibling (duh- we are trying!), so I was reading the One and Done board, hoping I might find some reasons to feel happier about the idea that DH and I may never have more kids. Mistaaaaaaaake!
It just made me feel worse- all of the reasoning about how an only may not have siblings but might later get married to someone who could help take care of aging parents, or if DH and I were to pass that DS could have really close friends that are like family are also uncertain for our family. There are so many unknowns, and DS's social impairments related to his autism are really obvious already. Just seems like a cruel joke life played on him: Kid, you're going to have trouble making friends, but guess what? Your parents are also going to have trouble having more kids so that you're at least used to being around people your age. Work that one out..
Also went to my first baby shower since being officially considered 2IF. I was pleasantly surprised, though- I was able to forget about myself and be truly happy for my friend, which felt so good!
With my lap over, I've been kind of depressed. At least before the procedure I could daydream that the endo was the whole problem and treating that would make everything better. Now, who knows? Only time will tell and knowing the odds are not in our favor, and that IUI and IVF aren't really on the table, we're not super confident.
Also, DS put my iphone in a cup of milk today. Just to ice the cake, you know?
Re: This is hard :( (just a vent)
I am sorry about everything, I know how you feel. I read that board and felt what you described.
The phone in the milk story did make me laugh. Thanks. I know it is not funny, but it is, you know.
Best of luck
Thank you. I am sorry anyone has to be here, but I'm glad to know someone out there gets it! Reading it over, the milk thing is making me laugh, although I am definitely feeling anxiety over possibly having to get a new phone! I'm trying to at least get the pictures and videos of my little destructo-tot through the computer or iCloud before I retire it.
I went to the OAD board, too, but actually I visited that one first before I came to 2IF. It was one of my low days when I wallowed in self-pity for a little too long and convinced myself I belonged there because if it was so hard to get pregnant this time, it must mean that my time is up. After poking around a bit, I started to feel worse... more power to those women, but most of them are making the choice to only have one. I don't even seem to have the ability to make that choice! I couldn't get away from that forum fast enough.
I'm sorry you felt so badly when you visited. I am praying for you during this time and hope that you will be happily rewarded during your journey
TTC #1 4/2009 - DD 2/5/10
TTC #2 since October 2011
2IF issues
Isn't that a strange feeling? I was so sure I would feel empowered but the sad feeling was completely unexpected!
TTC #1 4/2009 - DD 2/5/10
TTC #2 since October 2011
2IF issues
TTC #1 4/2009 - DD 2/5/10
TTC #2 since October 2011
2IF issues