Teen mom

Bbmum16 · April 2013

I'm a 17 year old living in Gainesville VA. Pregnancy has been, a roller coaster of cheating boyfriend to being bullied by teachers. I'm just lucky that I have parents who are completely supportive! I'm going to be 20 weeks on Wednesday and am so excited to finally be feeling the baby move around. my ex boyfriend wants to be involved with the baby 100 and after dating him for almost 2 years it's hard to imagine him not being around. I just noticed this posting thing and thought I'd post. :. Any recommendations for stuff that are must haves? Or how to deal with parenting one child in two separate homes My now exboyfriend's house and mine? what I should register for once it's baby shower time?

MzCurnett8886 · April 2013

What are your plans for child care? Is your family watching the baby? Or does your school have a daycare? Are you pre-registered if your school does have one? Have you started talking with the school about your maternity leave? How much do you plan to take? What about college and child care during that? A job? Child support is something that you may not want to talk about with your child's father but it will hold him accountable and you can work out custody. I don't need the answers to these questions it's something that you need to think about yourself and realize those questions are much more important for you and your child than what to register for if/when someone offers to throw a shower. I underline that because some women do not realize that a shower is a gift to the mother to be and not a rite of passage.

You may not want baby to go to his house immediately, but when you are comfortable: I think a pack and play is your best bet for your baby daddy to have at his house, it's contained if you are worried about safety and the baby can sleep/play in there. You need a carseat since your baby can't leave the hospital without one. A great travel system is cost effective (for me and DH) when it comes to transportation. Clothes while fun to shop for can be bought at (good) consignment stores and save you tons of money. Consignment shops will be your friend and do your research to find items that are within your means and still good quality. The single parents board will probably have a wealth of information for you.

katiebenes · April 2013

I would treat it like a standard divorce set-up. have a set custody schedule, make sure both places are livable for the baby... etc

There are so many registry guides out there that can help

mamasheridan · April 2013

Hey! I will be 20 weeks on Wed too! Must haves car seat/travel system onsies sleepers diapers bottles burp cloth blankets. If your having a shower I would register for anything you think you would use the first year.

strlitemiss · April 2013

I would worry about your house and things you will need. If your x needs your help great but I wouldn't put too much on your plate right now especially since the baby won't be stay over at his house for a while.

HisChamaoleGirl · April 2013

katiebenes:
I would treat it like a standard divorce set-up. have a set custody schedule, make sure both places are livable for the baby... etc

I agree with this as well. If you need help the single parents board and the blended families board is full of info and support.

ccrook · April 2013

katiebenes:
I would treat it like a standard divorce setup. have a set custody schedule, make sure both places are livable for the baby... etcThere are so many registry guides out there that can help :

Coparenting counseling canbe extremely helpful. You have an outside mediator whose interested in the child's well being and making a realistic plan in your particular circumstances. If you get started with one now it will be easy to go back for checkins every 6 month or so as your child hits new stages and needs new parenting considerations.

sugarellie · April 2013

I had DS young and was not with the dad when DS was born. The biggest thing I would say is work out a schedule and money plan. That was the two biggest things that DS's dad and I fought about. Once the baby is born and you have had a paternity test done to establish paternity you can file for child support. I would highly suggest doing that. It is state in forced and mandated and the state will tell your baby's dad how much to pay. This keeps him from accusing you of asking for too much $$ and you from feeling like he isn't giving enough. Also, keep in mind that transferring baby and all the baby stuff is not easy so I would recommend that you guys have baby gear at each house, at least the essentials. For the first 6 weeks or so I kept DS at my place since I was nursing and I wanted DS to get use to that before introducing the bottle so that's something to think about too. DS's dad just came over to my house on the days he would have had DS to visit him.

Bbmum16 · January 2014

Thank you so much for all the replies. My daughter is now three months old and perfect. I'm going to college hopefully in the fall at either GMU or ECU. It'll be tough but I want my education and I love my daughter. Im lucky enough that for my whole Senior year I don't have to actually go to school, instead I take my classes online so I can still graduate with an advanced diploma and take care of my Sophia. My ex is around a lot. He comes home every weekend (GMU is only 30min away) and we stay at either my house or his since I'm nursing. I'm currently trying to get a job but it's very difficult. And I would have to work the graveyard shift so Sophia has child care since I can't afford anything else. Bothe my prospective colleges have daycare centers that I'm working on getting registered for. And trying to find scholarships to so I can afford college. It's a lot but I'm managing it.

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