Mother's Day politics

SunAndRain · April 2013

SIL is pregnant. I'm thrilled for her. I even asked if I could throw her shower (she is only 9 weeks, just found out herself, so I told her to think about it and let me know when she is ready)

When I was pregnant last year she gave me a Mom's Day card. I know her intention was to be sweet BUT I don't count checkens before they hatch. I was a bit weirded out by it. I think it is bad luck. I just do. Perhaps it has to do with my religion, upbringing, or whatever. But that is how I feel.

With mom's day coming up I would never think to send anyone a card who didn't have a born child. This sounds so technically silly. Anyway, but now I'm worried if I don't send her one that she'll feel slighted and if I do that I'll feel unsettled, like I'm jinxing something.

What to do???

Mustardseed2007 · April 2013

I think that depends on her personality. If she's anything like me she won't think anything about you not sending her a card. If it were me I would have probably sent you one on impulse and then forgotten that I gave you one.

If she's like

Fullcircle06 · April 2013

I felt the same way last year when I was pregnant on Mother's Day. I didn't even want to think about it. But, everyone is different. I know they make "mom to be" specific cards. So, if you're thinking she'll feel left out, I guess you could do one of t

KathrynMD · April 2013

send her a card; don't over think it.

azuremama · April 2013

Yeah, I'd either just send one in the name of happy family relationships or be sure to mention that you didn't because you don't want to jinx anything. But I would probably just send the card.

WhitWed · April 2013

Definitely understand your point of view, and can respect it, but I think a lot of women who have experienced a miscarriage and/or loss would disagree and think of themselves as mothers with or without a physical baby to take home. If she sent one t

megann831 · April 2013

I understand that some people don't feel comfortable about celebrating things before they happen, I feel a little bit this way, but we do it anyway. The fact that you offered to have a baby shower for her, I'm assuming you'll have it before the b

katieh1017 · April 2013

Since she gave you a card last year when you were PG, sounds like she feels it is something to celebrate and I would send her a card based off of this reason. Get her the "mom to be" card.

SunAndRain · April 2013

megann831:
I understand that some people don't feel comfortable about celebrating things before they happen, I feel a little b

eyenigh · April 2013

Fullcircle06:
ETA: What if you sent her a thinking of you card and talk about how excited you are about celebrating together a

itsmevkb · April 2013

WhitWed:
Definitely understand your point of view, and can respect it, but I think a lot of women who have experienced a mi

laurakaz13 · April 2013

I don't do Mother's Day cards prior to the baby arriving. I've had a loss myself, but didn't consider myself a mother until my DD was born.

cchill01 · April 2013

If she sent you one, you should send her one. She obviously doesn't think it's strange.

Mrs.RockyM · April 2013

look around for a mom to be card - you're not jinxing anything that way! Hallmark or Target probably have them.

semdkm · April 2013

I think you should send her a card. You might be superstitious, but clearly she valued you as a Mom before your own child was born, which I think was a kind gesture on her part. What is the harm in returning the same gesture? </P

inthelost · April 2013

I would have thought that was weird last year too, i would not expect anything this mothers' day because my daughter is not born yet. but, since she sent you something maybe there is a mother-to-be card or small gift can you send her for being pregnant? I

bearfootz · April 2013

I'm thinking that if she gave you a card while you were pg then it would mean something to her if you gave her one now. Yes, she's very early, but she's probably trying to do her best not to worry about what could go wrong and would appreciate the g

st.augbride · April 2013

Even if God forbid she lost the baby, she is still a mom to that baby. I'd send her one especially since you know that's what she would do.

MammaBear81 · April 2013

KathrynMD:
send her a card; don't over think it.

This, and I think they actually have "mommy to be" c

SunAndRain · April 2013

JellyBellyStar:
I think your reaction to such a kind gesture is ridiculous. If I were you I'd get her s

KathrynMD · April 2013

SunAndRain:

Jell

groovygrl · April 2013

She clearly doesnt view it as a jinx since she gave you one so just give her one instead of stressing over it.

BeckyTheEngineer · April 2013

I thought mother's day was a day to buy a card for my mother, not everyone I know who is a mother. Do you send cards to all of the other women you know? No? Then I wouldn't send her a card.

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