- Pregnancy
- Baby & Toddler
- Parents
- Getting Pregnant
- Baby Names
- Product Reviews
-
Registry
- Community
-
More
Want a personalized experience?
Download the free app
August 2013 Moms
starshower22
member
Vent: DH can be such an a$$
starshower22
member
I don't know why but whenever we're disagreeing about something DH automatically goes into this mode of putting words in my mouth, invalidating my feelings, and bringing up past relationships. WTF dude??!! When I say "abc" bothers me it's not secret code for "actually, xyz bothers me". Then when I tell him no, "abc" is the problem he starts saying crap like "well that's a stupid thing to be upset about." or "don't you think you're overreacting. it's not that big of a deal", then when I tell him it's not stupid that it bothers me because it's MY opinion he brings up either my ex or my mom. Why?, I have no idea! It's stupid to do anyway but it really has no relevance to the topic at hand. It's just some random thing he brings up. I ask him what he's even talking about and how someone else has anything to do with the topic at hand. I HATE it!!! I never bring up his exes or parents, if we're disagreeing about something between us what in the world do they have to do with it?!, and I make a point of never telling him his feelings are wrong because I know it sucks to have people say that to you; but he immediately does this same crap every time he doesn't like what I'm saying. Plus now he has started blaming me being pregnant, even if it's something we've argued about before I was ever KU!! I've tried explaining my feelings, yelling at him, and giving him the silent treatment but nothing has yielded any different results. I hate that he blows off what I'm upset about and writes it off as overreacting, because of my ex and/or family, or his new fav of pregnancy. I just don't understand how one day he can be this incredibly kind person, then the next a complete a$$. It's like living with Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde!!! UGGGHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Btw, this whole argument started because for almost a week he's been telling me he's going to help me clean out our room/closet but when it comes time to actually do it he always has some excuse, which is usually he just wants to relax because he just got home from work (or is about to go in depending on his shift) and he'll proceed to spend 2 hours+ playing xbox. I get wanting to relax after work but guess what?? I want to relax too but unfortunately magic fairies aren't going to get our house ready for baby for us!
Sorry, I just had to get that out.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Vent: DH can be such an a$$
Oh geez, there's TWO of them like this?! We're do
Hugs to you! Yep, I've said it for years, we're all married to the same man. Mine does the deflective thing when we argue: He goes totally off-topic, makes it about him and gets mad back at me!
Usually the holding out/taking a step back and being
Sometimes I think he will PMS more than me. If he is sick forget it- call the hospital because he is on his death bed.
Could you imagine the men having to be pregnant and have the babies? LOL
You should take the hard drive out of his Xbox and see what he does.
My husband and I have been together for 12+ years (either dating or married) and are still learning how to "fight effectively" sometimes. For example, it took me a long time to realize that if he starts to get angry I need to walk away and not push his
Thanks for the feedback ladies! I'm going to talk with H when he gets home tonight and we'll see what happens. I've told him before that I don't feel like he respects me when he makes invalidating comments about my feelings, to which he'll apologize bu
Hubs and I took some marital courses at a local church (about a year or so after getting married) and we took away one very important thing: how to communicate properly and effectively.
The main point our teacher shared was HOW to communicate y
Recently had a similar battle. I realized that the root of why I was upset was because I felt as though he was choosing video games over me/baby, and that it makes me feel neglected and alone. That was the calm way of explaining it that act
My DH brought up my exes a few times. it pissed me off enough that I started to bring his up in the same manner. Our therapist said that was wrong of me. but it got the point across quickly. he stopped doing it.
Now as for counselin