December 2011 Moms

Am I wrong? Loaded question I know but...

So DH is turning 30 next month. He is not one for big occasions and he never makes a big deal out of his birthday. Every year I buy him some sort of sporting event tickets to go with his buddies either on his birthday or throughout the summer. This year I bought tickets for his parents, DS1 and him to go to a minor league game because DS1 will love it, DH can share it with his dad and one of his sons, and his mom of course. I thought that would be great. (DS2 would never tolerate it, we tried when he was a baby and he hated it!) So two weeks ago, his sister who is hardly ever around she is always traveling emailed me and asked me to throw together a surprise party or something for DH because she is in town and wants to celebrate with him. Well his birthday is 5/8 I cannot and do not want to throw together a party. Now she is mad because she wants to do something, and keeps saying well can't we just have people over your house after the game and have some cake. We that will be a sunday night, when the kids are going to bed and we have work the next day, so no. Plus I don't have extra money just lying around right now. I wont be done with my masters until the end of this year, so any real extra money is going towards tuition and books for that, on top of childcare and every other expense. 

Am I a nut? I feel like I should just tell her again the plans are made, these are them and perhaps when she comes back into town they can celebrate on their own.  

Why do families think they can just jump in like this? 

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Re: Am I wrong? Loaded question I know but...

  • I don't think you're wrong.  It's pretty ballsy of his sister to basically insist that you throw a party at your house.
    AVT - 12.2.11
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    LCT - 5.15.14 ~ 9lbs, 22.5 inches

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  • I would be annoyed, too. If she wants to throw him a party, she can do it in her own space and bake the cake. I hate it when people think they can tell you what you should do. Grrrr. 
    DS born 12/2011
    DD born 03/2014

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  • I'm pretty straight forward, so this may sound harsh.

    I'd tell her no.  You already made plans for his birthday, she should have told someone sooner that she'd be in town.  Sorry, better luck next time.

    Maybe have her over for di

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  • -T--T- member

    You are not a nut. My brother is exactly like your DH, he doesn't make a big deal about bdays and doesn't care for parties. I call him, say happy birthday, and ask what his plans are. If he wants to have people over for cake and ice cream, fine. If he

  • Thanks everyone, my SIL gets under my skin so its nice to know I am not being crazy here. Sometimes I know I can feel so pressured by her but this time she is being stupid. If she came to me months ago and asked if we could throw a party together that wou
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