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Birthday party vent

Shayna0182Shayna0182 member
in Special Needs

Ds is turning 4 in June.  I'm in the early stages of planning his birthday party. I created a nice guest list of close family and friends.  The total number of people invited is 16, and those include his grandparents, and aunts and uncles on both sides.  There will be a total of 5 kids invited between the ages of 8 to 4 months.  There will be just enough people that ds will not be overwhelmed and he is close enough with everyone that I think he will have a great time. 

 Here's the vent:  I made the mistake of mentioning this to my mom.  She of course had 10 more people she wanted to invite (that ds isn't even close to) and thinks I'm completely selfish because they didn't make our guest list.  I gave her the reasons why our guest list is small.  They are:

 

1. Our house is a 3 bedroom 2 bath ranch.  It's not tiny, but it's not huge either.  His birthday is in June, so it could very well be 90 degrees outside.  We have to be able to fit everyone inside the house in case it's too hot to hang out outside.

2. Ds gets very overwhelmed and prone to meltdowns when he's around a lot of people, especially people he doesn't know very well.  

 Geez, I wish my mother would understand Ds has ASD, and isn't like the typical toddler.  Even at daycare, if there are too many kids around him, he's prone to acting out. It's his birthday, not my mother's!

 

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Re: Birthday party vent

  • aiche Umm Ayoubaiche Umm Ayoub member
    Vent away I understand how you feel my 3 1/2 year old is prone to meltdowns when she's overwhelmed ( she has a sensory disorder along with a mood disorder ) some days are better than others
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  • malcivarmalcivar member

    Totally understand and I think 16 ppl is a good size guest list.  I just went to a bday party for a friend of ours whose son currently has a PDD-NOS dx and they kept it to just under 20 (including the host family) and it was scheduled for 3 hrs. &

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  • MaxandRubyMaxandRuby member

    It is your son's party and your house, not your mother's.  It is up to YOUR family who is invited, not her.  Why is your mom even attempting to invite (or just telling you to invite) additional people?  It isn't up to her and she needs t

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  • KelleyBeanKelleyBean member
    I agree with Max and Ruby. You need to stand yur ground with mom. You know your son and his limits. The day is about him and if too many people will cause a meltdown, that's not fun for anyone. 
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  • Shayna0182Shayna0182 member

    imageKelleyBean:
    I agree with Max and Ruby. You need to stand yur ground with mom. You know your son and his limits. The day is abo
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