Infertility Veterans

Very public meltdown

Has anyone ever lost it in public?

Tonight I went to CVS to buy tampons since I stupidly assumed I wouldn't be needing any for a few months, I hadn't made a purchase when I started stims. There's a gentleman and his daughter in line in front of me. The little girl goes over to the flowers and asks her dad to buy some. He asks her, "for who?" And she says, "for mommy". I almost had to walk out of the store without my purchase because I was fighting tears. I think the guy at the register must have thought I was insane.

FU IF!!
Married 2007
3 Clomid IUIs -- BFNs
IVF #1 never made it to transfer
On "egg health" cocktail DHEA/CoQ10/FRC/Pregnitude/Melatonin
Starting IVF #2 for Feb 2013
Follistim/Menopur/Ganirelix
Cancelled mid-cycle due to high P4 levels early on.
OCPs again for IVF 2.5 mid-March. IVF 2.5 transferred two "gorgeous" 5-day blasts and BFFN. Even REI is baffled
On indefinite hold until a huge stroke of serendipity led me to IVF 3 May 2014
Testing found positive cardiolipins/APS, now on lovenox and intralipid infusions
Transfer of 2 5-day blasts and (FINALLY) BFFP!! 1st ultrasound shows two sacs and two HB, but one is sluggish, almost expecting vanishing twin Subsequent ultrasound confirmed vanishing twin, but my other Little critter looks fantastic!
"You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it."
-- Margaret Thatcher


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Re: Very public meltdown

  • Awe! That's cute!
    I had a little meltdown of my own today. And may I add its only day two of stims!!! Ive already gone over the deep end. It goes like this....

    I'm a hairstylist and I just FIRED a client today. Yeah she pissed me off so
    Me 34 and DH 39 married in aug. 2002
    Did 5 round of clomid 2010 =BFN
     High levels of NK CELLS DX sept.2012 DOR:# 0.02 
    IVF #1 May 2012  ER 4, EF 2, ET 2 =BFN
    MINI IVF Oct.2012  Cancelled 10-27-12
    Ivf #3 Antagonist Protocol April 2013
    Shared cycle..Donor cycled in July Got 12 eggs 9 fertilized and 8 frozen!!
    DE FET #1 Sept. 3rd 2013 FIRST BFP EVER 5dp5dt
    miscarried Sept 24th at 5 weeks 5 days
    Etopic  D&C and hysterscopy Nov 5 2013
    dx with pre genetic blood clotting dec 2013
    FET #2 Jan 31st  2014 
    Miscarried for a second time again at 5 weeks 5 days
    Currently fostering to adopt an amazing little 1 year old boy..P.J!
    FET#3  is Oct 29th 2014
    BFN on fet #3
    Last and FINAL FET coming JAN 28th 2015
    Everyone Welcome






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  • Hugs!  I've had public meltdowns like that, too.  It's tough when the wrong thing catches you on the wrong day when you're coming off fertility drugs.  It took me a while to feel normal after my last IVF in February.
  • I've come super close to having it happen myself, and I've cried quietly at my desk at work many times. If anyone asked me what was up, I'd just say I had allergies or something. :(

    Sometimes things are just too much to keep a happy face. I'm sor

    ************ Signature/Ticker Warning ************
    Me (32) DH (36) - Finding our way to baby #1
    Me: POF/DOR - AMH <0.16, heterozygous c677t MTHFR, insulin resistant and gluten intolerant
    DH: Severe MFI

    12/2/11 - IUI #1- BFN 
    8/1/12 - IVF #1 - Zero response from max stims (600iu intramuscularly)

    My ovaries are just for decoration

    12/6/12 - Adopted five embryos that had been frozen for over ten years!
    2/11/13 - DEmbryo FET #1 Thawed four, sadly two didn't survive. Transferred two beautiful blasts. 
    2/16/13 - First BFP of my life @ 6dp5dt! EDD 10/30/13
    3/27/13 - After beta and u/s hell, no heartbeat ever detected. D&C at 9w1d.

    6/5/13 - Adopted four new embryos that had been frozen for seven years!
     
    9/12/13 - DEmbryo FET #2. Thawed and transferred two beautiful blasts
    9/17/13 - BFP @ 5dp6dt! EDD 05/31/14
    9/29/13 - m/c @ 5w1d. :(

    11/19/13 - DEmbryo FET #3. Thawed and transferred one blast from each batch. Wow!
    11/23/13 - BFP @ 4dp6dt! EDD 8/7/13
    Beta #1 @ 13dp6dt - 522  Beta #2 @ 16dp6dt - 1373 
    6w5d ultrasound showed one perfect baby with a beautiful heartbeat of 134bpm!

    Snowflake baby is a girl! 
    Our beautiful Snowflake girl arrived on July 22, 2014!   
    My embryo adoption blog: Wishing on a Snowflake
     
        image      image 
  • I have lost it in so many places...don't even feel bad.

    church and hallmark stores are particularly bad. stupid card aisle...

    hang in there 

    TTC #1 since 12/2010 DH: MFI, cancer survivor Me: Resected septate uterus, lap treated mild endo, tubes open, ovulate on own, autoimmune disease 3 Failed IUI's (2/2012, 4/2012, 6/2012) 
    IVF #1 August 2012. BFP! Beta #1 56.7 Beta #2 150 One baby, one heartbeat on 9/20/12! no h/b @7w6d. dandc @8w0d
    FET #1 December 2012, BFN
    FET #2 February 2013, no embies survived thaw
    IVF #2, BFP #2, Loss #2 March 2013, Scar tissue discovered, RPL testing,
    IVF #3, BFP #3, Loss #3 (twins) September 2013
    Hostile ute, moving onto Gestational Carrier!

    GC/FET #1 of 1 5AA blast and 1 compacted blast, February 2014, BFP #4 on 3/1/2014!
    6w u/s 1 bean with h/b of 145 bpm, 8w u/s 187 bpm
    EDD 11/7/14. Please, please, please stick little one!

    Praying unceasingly for a miracle. ALL welcome!

    image










  • I feel you and join you in a hearty FU to IF. I haven't had bad reactions to stims, but there were days on clo.mid I cried my entire drive home. The drugs don't help, but then on top of that there are all the very real emotions hitting you throughout t

  • Of course, this was on the tail of my failed cycle, so AF and the mere need for tampons was bad enough without the adorable little girl wanting to buy her mommy flowers. Plus me coming off progesterone and day 3 of migraines didn't help
    Married 2007
    3 Clomid IUIs -- BFNs
    IVF #1 never made it to transfer
    On "egg health" cocktail DHEA/CoQ10/FRC/Pregnitude/Melatonin
    Starting IVF #2 for Feb 2013
    Follistim/Menopur/Ganirelix
    Cancelled mid-cycle due to high P4 levels early on.
    OCPs again for IVF 2.5 mid-March. IVF 2.5 transferred two "gorgeous" 5-day blasts and BFFN. Even REI is baffled
    On indefinite hold until a huge stroke of serendipity led me to IVF 3 May 2014
    Testing found positive cardiolipins/APS, now on lovenox and intralipid infusions
    Transfer of 2 5-day blasts and (FINALLY) BFFP!! 1st ultrasound shows two sacs and two HB, but one is sluggish, almost expecting vanishing twin Subsequent ultrasound confirmed vanishing twin, but my other Little critter looks fantastic!
    "You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it."
    -- Margaret Thatcher


    image
    image
  • FU IF is right!  I'm sorry you had a rough experience.  I have definitely lost it in public before, and at my office.  <3
    My Blog
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers

    TTC #1 since February 2011
    Me: 29 (3/5/13- high NK cells)  DH: 28 (5/8/12- MFI low morph and motility)
    Cycle #21 (IUI#1), Cycle #22 (HSG 9/21/12) and Cycle #23 (IUI#2)=  image
    Cycle #24- December Snow Bunny IVF #1
    ER 12/6/12 (14R, 11M, 9F), ET 12/9/12 transferred 2 day 3 embies
    Bleeding and low betas=very cautious image C/P 5W3D
    Cycle #26 March Lucky Duck- FET #1
    scheduled 3/20/13- CANCELLED- lining issues
    Cycle #27 May Emerald- FET #1.2
    delayed- Starting Trental for 3 months + natural cycles Cycle #28-30=  image
    Cycle #31 August Shooting Star- FET #1.3 
    transferred 1 hatching blast 8/21/13= imageBetas 8/30 (108) and 9/3 (565)

    U/S 9/19/13- HR is 128!  U/S #2 10/4/13- HR is 174!
    It's a BOY!

  • Oh, honey I'm so sorry.  That totally sucks, and stuff like that sneaks up on you just when you least expect it.  Yes, that happened to me.  A few years ago I was at my dermatologist and she wanted to put me on a new rx that isn't safe f

    Lilypie Second Birthday tickers

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