Trouble TTC

Rant-stupid GP made me cry

I've seen the same general practitioner for the last four years (and had seen her when I previously lived in my hometown from age 16-23).  Almost each time I've gone there, I've mentioned either our TTC or IF.  

Today while the nurse is going over meds and vitals before the GP comes in I mention our miscarriage (in case they want it in my chart) and when she takes my temp and it's 99.6 I say "Well, now I'm mad at myself for forgetting to take a HPT this morning".  She mentions we can add it to my annual blood work (I'm there for annual thyroid check since they removed half and A1C level for my diabetes.)  I said don't bother since a natural cycle BFP is nearly impossible and I'm not "late" yet (AF should arrive today or tomorrow).  

GP comes in having talked to the nurse about all that and after saying she's sorry, asks if the m/c was emotionally hard.  What?!  What do you think?  I say, well after trying three years and nine months to finally get PG only to miscarry? Yes! (cue start crying)  You try spending almost ten thousand dollars with nothing to show for it and see how you feel!"  Her response?  "I'm sorry, I didn't know you'd been trying that long."  Come on!  I've talked with you about the IUIs and IVF possibility before.  I know the drugs and such are in my chart.  Really?

 And who asks someone if a m/c was emotionally hard?  Shouldn't that just be assumed?  And that darn temp made me come home and take a HPT in the middle of the day, when my urine is diluted.  Of course it's a BFN, since most likely I'm only 10dpo (or 13 if I O'd real early).  Aaarrgghhh, I hate crying in front of people!  I should have told my GP that next week is NIAW and maybe she should read up on how to be more sensitive.  

Rant over. 


TTC since July 2009. Dx MFI & LPD. 
IUI#1&2&3 (2011 & 2012) BFN
IUI#4 1/23/13 on 75iu x9 Follistim = BFP then chem preg m/c (Feb 2013)
IUI#5 BFN (April 2013)
IVF w/ICSI Oct. 2, 2012 - 13R, 11M, 7F, 1 frozen blast 4BB grade - - - FET Nov 15, 2013
BFP! Beta 1:104 @ 10dp6dt, Beta 2:178 @ 12dp6dt,  beta 3:366 @ 14dp6dt
Saw heartbeat twice before missed M/C at 8w3d on 12/27/13, missing my little angel boy
JUNE 2014 IVF#2;  5R, 2M, 1F Three day transfer 6/7.  Beta 6/18 - BFN
Child Free Now?
S/PAIFW , S/PALW

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Re: Rant-stupid GP made me cry

  • So sorry you had to go through that.

    I don't think anyone understands how hard a loss is unless you've gone through it and when you add IF on top of it, it totally sucks! HUGE ((hugs)) to you today.

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  • Im sorry for you loss and for the GP's behavior. So insensitive. 

    Hope the rest of your day is better.  

    Me 32/DH 38
    TTC since 05/2011
    HSG 07/2011 right tube blocked
    Clomid 50mg 3/2012 - no response
    Clomid 50mg 4/2012 - no response
    Met with RE 6/2012
    PCOS/IR diagnosed 6/2012
    Femura 5mg  9/2012 - no response
    Laparoscopy 12/2012 close off right tube
    Clomid 150mg 3/2013 - no response
    1st Follistim Cycle 7/16/2013 -  CD3-6 125iu; CD7-8 150iu; CD9-15 175iu; Trigger 8/1; IUI scheduled for 8/3/2013...BFN AF arrived 8-16-2013
    8/2013 cycle benched for cyst
  • Ugh. Why on earth would she ask that? I'm so sorry! And yes she should have known about how long you've been trying. I think she was just looking for an excuse for what she said. (((hugs)))
             *********************************************************************************
                      

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    After 1 year of infertility, our little miracle was conceived via our 3rd IUI on May 5, 2013.
    Holland Sophia was born Jan 24, 2014.
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  • I am so sorry! I hate crying in front of people too and my loss has made me an emotional wreck pretty much. Friends at work were even like...your crying and you are usally our rock. Loss changes you... :(

    Ticker/Siggy Warning:  Children and losses mentioned


    TTC #1 since 7/2011
    ME: 37  DH: 38
    SA-12/28/11-normal
    HSG-1/16/12-possible blocked left tube
    BFP#1---CP 7/9/12
    Hysteroscopy-8/9/12-blocked left tube for sure, proceeding with IUI#1
    IUI#1 (Gonal-F + trigger)=BFP#2 m/c @ 19w1d D&E 1/23/13
    IUI #2 (Gonal F + trigger)=BFP#3 EDD 1/6/14 TWINS!!!
    Identical girls born 11/17/13
    BFP#4 EDD 8/27/15 MMC at 7w6d

    BFP#5 m/c at 6w

    BFP#6 EDD 10/5/16  Going Strong!  It's a Girl!

    Lilypie Premature Baby tickers

     

     

  • Ugg...I am so sorry you had to go through that.  I keep expecting medical professionals to, you know...be professional.  Even if she hadn't known how long you were trying, that was a horrendous question to ask.  And what ever happened&
  • I'm so sorry that happened today.  You have every right to cry and know that it is a healthy release.  It's just sad that sometimes you get to see how drs. don't read their charts or prepare for their patient.  Imagine if a teacher didn't r

    ************** Siggy Warning************


    Married August 2012 -- Me (40 yrs old) My husband (45 yrs. old) 

    RE referral from ObGYN in late Jan. 2013 -- Testing Confirms Unexplained IF 

    IUI #"s1 - 3 (Femara + IUI) April - June 2013 - all BFN

      Decided to do IVF... Began stimming on September 10th!  Egg Retrieval 9/20/13.  19 eggs: 6 to mature to freeze after 6 fertilized with ICSI

     3 morula stage embryos transferred on 9/25/13.....Beta #1 on 10/4/13/ = 7.5  Beta #2 on 10/6/13 =  negative

      IVF#2 - Lupron plan  (set to begin on 10/28/13)  (Planning on thawing and fertilizing our 6 eggs with ICSI as well as all of the mature eggs they retrieve with this fresh cycle.)

     Late October 2013 - ectopic pregnancy - methotrexate injection....benched 3 months

    CD1 - 12/5/13...Lupron set to start on 12/26/13; CD1 - 1/2/14....Baseline 1/3/14....begin follistim tonight and continue with lupron.  (Got my calendar today!  IVF#2 is a go!)

    ER = 1/14/14  (11 eggs....9 were mature. 9 fertilized.  Of the 6 mature eggs we thawed, only 4 fertilized.  At this time, we have 13 eggs fertilized and growing.  Waiting for news about a 3-day or 5-day transfer.)

    ET = 1/19/14  (5dt).....3 blastocysts transferred!   (All nine embryos didn't make it to freeze.  =(  )

    Beta #1 = 1/28/14   (2 weeks after ER)  BFP! 209 (9dp5dt)   EDD 10/7/14

    Beta #2 - 1/30/14  (11 dp5dt) 302

    Beta #3 - 2/3/14  (15 dp5dt)  1222 

    Ultrasound set for 2/17/14......TWINS!        Twin A - HR 124 bpm; Twin B - HR 126 bpm

    Final Ultrasound with RE 3/10/14 - Twin A - HR 176 bpm; Twin B - HR 177 bpm.

     PAIF/SAIF Welcome! 

     

     

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  • So sorry that she was so clueless and without some common sense.  Who on Earth would say that their loss wasn't hard in them...geez.  

    Try to have a good evening and maybe a glass of wine.  Lots of hugs today!  

    CafeMom Tickers
     Anniversary
    TTC since July 2011
    BFP #1: 2/15/12-Ectopic/Mtx at 6 wks

    BFP #2: 10/12/12-m/c at 5 wks. 
    BFP #3: 8/27/13
    Me: MTHFR, Low AMH (1.1), High NK cells and Antiphospholipid Antibodies.
    DH:MFI-Low morph (1%), DNA fragmentation: Excellent!
    5 rounds of clomid, 3 IUIs, and multiple non-medicated cycles- BFFN                                                      
    IVF with ICSI in August 2013 brought us our babies.  ER-9R, 7M, 4F w/ICSI  ET of 2-Grade 2 blasts. 
    + HPT at 6dp5dt. #1 (8dp5dt)- 105    #2 (13dp5dt)- 510  #3 (15dp5dt)- 960  #4 (17dp5dt)- 1889
    Dx shortened cervix, PTL, and preeclampsia during pregnancy.  Lots of medications and 13 weeks of bedrest, babies were born healthy at 34w4d!


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  • :::hugs::: you would think that your doctor would be better versed in dealing with emotional issues. I'm sorry you had to deal with that.
    Me: 37, DH: 35 :: TCC since 2/11 SA: Perfect! CD3  HSG = Blocked Right Tube
    April- Femara 2.5mg + Trigger + IUI = BFN   May- Femara 5mg = CX - No Response on Left = BFN
    June- Femara 7.5mg + Trigger + IUI = BFN  August- Lap & Hysteroscopy = Blocked & Partially Blocked Tubes
    September- Femara 5mg = CX - No Response on Left = BFN  October- 100mg Clomid + Trigger + TI = BFN
    IVF # 1: Stims 11/30 ER 12/12/12! (10R, 10M, 8F, 2T, 6 F) :: Beta #1- 176  c/p @ 4w4d
    FET #1 February 26th :: Lost 4 to Thaw, Transferred 2 = BFFN
    IVF # 2 Stims 5/10 ER 5/21 (15R, 13M, 13F, 2T, 7F- 6d3 & 1d5) :: Beta # 1- 15 c/p @ 4w
    FET #2 Cancelled, Right Tube Developed a Hydro  8/28 Hydro & Scar Tissue Removed  Cleared for FET
    FET #2.2 Scheduled for September 20th
    2 Thawed, 2 Transferred! Beta #1- 96, Beta #2 906! :: EDD June 10th
    2015- 2 failed FET. We are done
    SURPRISE! BFP 8/8/16   EDD 4/1/17

     
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  • I will never understand some things that come out of some peoples' mouths.  For real.  It's pretty ridiculous.  Sorry you had to endure that.  People are nuts. 
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  • I'm so sorry:-(. It hurts the most when those that should understand make the dumbest/most insensitive comments!

    ~TTC#1 Since July 2011~ 
    Dx: Fibroids & Tubal Infertility
                                                        9/12 -IVF#1 =BFN; 5/14 -IVF#2=BFP:-) EDD 2.19.2015                                                

    S/PAIF Welcome 





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  • :( that was really insensitive... so sorry that you had to go through that. <hugs>
    **SIGGY WARNING**

    Me: 32 DH: 35  TTC#1 since March 2012
    Dx: Poor Embryo Quality, Arcuate Uterus, Poor Uterine Blood Flow, Mild Endo, 
           Protein S Deficiency, Sjorgen's Syndrome 

    IUI #1-5: BFN
    Laparoscopy & Hysteroscopy: minimal endo, partial septoplasty
    IVF #1: 10R/6M/6F ~ Day 3 ET = BFN
    IVF #2: 14R/9M/5F ~ transfer canceled ~ all embryos arrested at 1-2 cell stage
    IVF #3: 9R/5M/5F ~ 1 frosty!
    IVF #4 (FET #1): BFN

    IVF #5 (DE IVF #1 with Dr. KK protocol): Currently PREGNANT!!!!!!
    Synthroid + Prednisone + Metformin + Baby Aspirin + Supplements Galore = 15+ pills a day
    Lupron + Lovenox + Delestrogen + IVIG + B/W = 2-5 pokes a day
    19R, 17M, 17F - transferred two Grade A blasts 11/16, four frosties!!!
    Beta #1 11/24 (13dpo/8dp5dt) = 367 ~ Beta #2 11/26 (15dpo/10dp5dt) = 709
    Beta #3 11/29 (18dpo/13dp5dt) = 1,997 ~ Beta #4 12/1 (20dpo/15dp5dt) = 3,403

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    My Blog: Running and Dreaming for Two ~ All are Welcome!
  • Awww! I hate how the health system has made our doctors such robots. I hope she checked herself after that. I am also sorry about your BFN - there is nothing more depressing than the hopes you have when you take the test to the negative result, so emot

    Married since 2008 Me:36 DH: 35 TTC since August 2011. SA - "good" ultrasound - "excellent" Blood work - "good" Diagnosis: unexplained infertility Starting cycle 1 of clomid 3/27
  • I am so sorry.  I just want to hug you right now...

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  • Ugh that sucks! Some people just have no common sense. *hugs*
  • I'm so sorry you have to deal with such an insensitive comment. Hugs!
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    TTC #1 since November 2011
    Dx: Unexplained Infertility, probable endometriosis
    Feb-April 2013: Femara + TI: BFN
    May - September 2013:  Follistim + Ovidrel + IUI#1-4 = BFN
    IVF # 1 November 2013: transferred 1 perfect blast = BFN
    IVF # 2 April 2014: Endo scrape, transferred 2 blasts = BFP!! (first ever!), CP
    FET #1 June 2014: transferred 2 blasts = BFFN
    New Dx: Repeat Implantation Failure
     IVF # 3 November 2014 = BFP!!  Beta #1 9dp5t 272  Beta # 2 11dp5dt 626
    It's Twins! 
    *everyone welcome*
  • Ug. That's horrible. I am so sorry. 
  • im sorry Katib, sometimes i feel people just take it for granted that they were blessed with kids (which i am sure she does have) and therefore do not know the value or fail to empathize with those who have trouble having. Hugsss
    Daisypath - Personal pictureDaisypath Anniversary tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers BFP # 1 on March 30/2012, H/B absent on 7/7/2012 , D/E 7/10/2012 PCOS- DX at age 17, Metformin regulated @ 1st but last cycle- anovulatory . My Body is a mystery. image
  • Oh that is horrible. What in the world possessed her to say something so...stupid. I hope the rest of your day was world's away from that moment in quality.

    TTC since March of 2012
    Me: 27 Dh: 35 Testing Begins 3/5/13
    Six SA's show DH has low numbers across the board = severe MFI
    Genetic testing for me = MTHFR+, also carrier for blood clotting disorder Otherwise all else normal
    Dh's karotype= Normal!!
     Mini-IVF/ICSI - July -August 2014 - 1R,M,&F Transferred 1 Grade 1 Morula-5dt - BFFN


     
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