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March 2013 Moms
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Birth Story & I miss you guys!

rm2013rm2013 member
in March 2013 Moms

Hi everyone, I kinda fell off the map but I'm back! Little girl Morgan arrived on 3/20 and is the apple of our eye. Her birth story was anything but what we planned however.

At 41 weeks I went in to my regular appointment expecting to have my doctor discuss setting an induction date. Exactly when she was checking the baby's heartbeat, I happened to have a contraction (I was only having strong ones 2-3 times a day) and we heard the heart beat slow down so much it was absolutely scary. My doctor said it went down to 50 beats per min and sent me immediately to the hospital. I wasn't prepared at all because this baby had been making no moves like she was coming anytime soon - all our bags and everything were at home. DH was at work and I had to call him in tears while I was driving to the hospital so he could meet me there. I was admitted and hooked up to monitors where they tracked her heart rate for a few hours and did an ultrasound. The diagnosis was she had to come out now.

I had my heart set on a peaceful natural birth and had taken classes and was all prepared for that route - I had done no research or preparation for anything else! They gave me the option of trying an induction or going straight for a c-section. I decided to go for the induction and still try to go natural. I had my water broken and started on pitocin with no pain meds. After 6 hours of labor and at 5 cm I couldn't take it anymore. I was so disappointed but the pitocin contractions were unholy painful and as they kept increasing the dosage it got unbearable and they were back to back without even a lull in between to catch my breath. So I got the epidural, and after another 4 hours later had only progressed to 6 cm, and at this point the baby's heart rate was decelerating significantly again so there was no alternative but to do a c-section as my doctor felt LO wouldn't make it through a vaginal delivery. I really didn't even have time to process it, I was taken to the operating room 30 minutes after my doctor made the call.

Recovery was tough and is still ongoing, I ended up being in the hospital for 6 days and struggled with severe pain and nausea and couldn't eat hardly anything. I firmly wanted to exclusively breastfeed, but Morgan was not doing well on colostrum alone, she lost 10% of her birth weight in 3 days so we had to supplement with formula. That was tough and I just hated feeling like I was letting her down. Fast forward to now, she is doing great and has gained about 1.5 lbs from her original birth weight (yeah!). Breast feeding is going better, we still have to give her a little formula but she's mostly on breast milk and it seems in another week my supply should be enough to not need to supplement. I'm still struggling with pain issues and the c-section incision is not healing properly, and I can't help but feel robbed of the birth experience that I wanted. All in all I am so happy to have my healthy baby and I know it doesn't matter in the end how she got here, but it's still hard to shake the bummed out feeling. I'm hoping that it will go away with more time passing.

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