Infertility

XP IFV :: Le Sigh::

First off I will say that my MIL and SIL are very supportive of my IF life. My SIL is my best friend and confidant. My SIL got married a couple weeks ago. My in laws family is all from Indiana so they had to fly down. There was a girl cousin that wasn't coming. In fact the whole cousins family wasn't coming, I was told it was because of a previously planned vacation. So fast forward to a couple hours ago where DH, me, mil, and SIL are all sitting down having dinner out. Someone mentions Jaime, the girl cousin, and DH looks at me and asks do you know why Jaime didn't come to the wedding? From the expression on everyone's face and the way they were looking at me. I said let me guess, she's pregnant? Bingo. Jaime is 23, been with her bf less than a year and of course on BCP. The reason she didn't come was because she has pretty bad m/s. she is already like 15w or so. Everyone usually keeps pregnancy news from me and I prefer it. It never fails that someone wants to tell me about someone else getting pregnant when I'm having a really bad IF day.    So at this point they begin talking about how the grandparents are pretty upset about it since she isn't married and other reasons. My MIL then says she is disappointed because she had the first grandchild and we were supposed to have the first great grandchild. I almost fell out of my chair. It's not like I'm not driving myself crazy, stressing my marriage, putting my body through hell and back and not to mention spending a small fortune. She tried to back track her words but it was to late. DH let her stumble a minute then just told her to leave it alone. DH and SIL both told her what she said sounded awful. Then I begin asking how much the out of town family knew about my issues since I got a comment on a fb post from a aunt two weeks ago saying she was rooting for me. The post was a picture of a dos Equis bottle at 2:00p saying it was 5'o clock somewhere. So unless she was rooting for me to get *** faced I had no idea what she was rooting for. Yep, she has spilled the beans to the whole family. Even guy cousins was asking DH questions while they were here for the wedding. I knew they were all looking at me strangely. She said its natural for them to ask when or why not since they thought we were going to start right after the wedding. But I guess a simple they are trying or I'm not sure wouldn't have sufficed. I know she means well but IF is hard enough without other people telling you that your situation is also a disappointment to them. Rant over.  
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Re: XP IFV :: Le Sigh::

  • I'm sorry you had to deal with this. This is why I haven't said anything to any family at all. I'd rather they just think I'm not interested or ready than to get all the questions or people walking on eggshells around me. I say have the dos Equis for now
    Married 2007
    3 Clomid IUIs -- BFNs
    IVF #1 never made it to transfer
    On "egg health" cocktail DHEA/CoQ10/FRC/Pregnitude/Melatonin
    Starting IVF #2 for Feb 2013
    Follistim/Menopur/Ganirelix
    Cancelled mid-cycle due to high P4 levels early on.
    OCPs again for IVF 2.5 mid-March. IVF 2.5 transferred two "gorgeous" 5-day blasts and BFFN. Even REI is baffled
    On indefinite hold until a huge stroke of serendipity led me to IVF 3 May 2014
    Testing found positive cardiolipins/APS, now on lovenox and intralipid infusions
    Transfer of 2 5-day blasts and (FINALLY) BFFP!! 1st ultrasound shows two sacs and two HB, but one is sluggish, almost expecting vanishing twin Subsequent ultrasound confirmed vanishing twin, but my other Little critter looks fantastic!
    "You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it."
    -- Margaret Thatcher


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  • I'm sorry, Crystal.  I'll say it again...why can't this just be easy for us all?  
    Me:40 DH: 43 m/c #1 4/8/08 @ 5w::natural
    m/c #2 missed m/c discovered 12/11/08 @ 8w3d :: d&c 12/15/08
    Feb 2009-began seeing an RE:: DX with unexplained IF
    Sept 2009 -2010 TTC using femara ...eventually work called me out of town.
    June 2011 DX with thyroid cancer-forced to put baby making on hold
    11/15/12 IUI #1 BFN and 12/15/12 IUI #2 BFN
    Feb 2013 IVF-BFN:: April 2013 FET-Cancelled:: July 2013 FET-1 frostie
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  • Ugh. We are so in the same crappy boat and it's no fun. I cannot wait for this IF ride to be over. I wish people who can't sympathize or have no clue would just do something nice for me. Instead of running your mouth, come watch a movie or go shopping.
     36 DH 33 TTC for over 3 years
    First mini-IVF Sept 2011... Only 1 egg! ... BFN
    Switching RE
    IVF#2 May 2012 9 eggs and only 2 sperm, WTH!
    BFN
    IVF #3 March 2013~Tesa with back-up Donor Sperm,Tesa, unsuccessful used DS~ Chemical :(   

    Switching RE's within practice

    2 frosties waiting for us, November 2013!!!!!   Transferred 2 "average" blasts 11/20/2013
    BFP!!!!!!!  Boy/Girl Twins!!!!!! Due 08/08/2014

    My Blog




    *~God gives his hardest battles to his toughest solders. Unknown.
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  • Oh Crystal, that sucks. I'm sorry she shared your private stuff. I'm sure you are not the least bit disappointing to them. You have every right to be upset. This is why we can't risk telling ANYONE. But it sounds like overall they are pretty supportive.Yo

    imageimageimageimageimageimageimageimage
    My BLOG: www.ivfbabyquest.wordpress.com -Update - old blog.

    PAIF/SAIF Welcome!
    Me: 42, Hubby: 35, TTC since Jan 2010. Dx: DOR due to advanced maternal age. Also: Hypothyroidism (100mcg Levothyroxin). Positive for MTHFR (hetero-C677T), Factor V Leiden, and Fragile X (on DH side). Taking pre-natal vitamins
    .
    First natural PG 9/27/11; mc: 1/20/12

    First RE visit: 8/8/12, Saline Sonogram: 8/28/12, IVF injection class: 10/11/12, add FaBB Tab for FVL, +Vitamin D.
    IVF #1: 10/17/12 Baseline: FSH- 9.4, E2- 24, LH- 3.7, Prog- 0.3 The u/s showed 6 follicles in my right  & 9 in my left. Rx: 150 Bravelle & 150 Menopur SQ nightly. 10/21/12: Add Ganirelix SQ every morning.
    ER 10/28/12: 13 Retreived. 7 Mature. 6 Fertilized. 5 Made it to PGS. ET 11/2/12: CANCELED. All 5 came back from PGS as having "severe abnormalities."
    IVF #2: 1/7/13 Baseline: FSH- 8.8, 4 follicles in my right & 6 in my left. Rx: 150 Bravelle & 150 Menopur SQ nightly. 1/11/13: Add Ganirelix SQ every morning. hCG Trigger 1/16/13

    ER 1/18/13: 9 Retrieved. 5 Mature. 5 Fertilized. 2 Made it to PGS. ET 1/23/13: CANCELED. All embryos (he even sent the ones not growing) came back from PGS as having "multiple severe abnormalities."
    IVF #3:
    NEW RE! 3/1/13 Baseline: FSH- 9.6, E2- 61, Prog- 0.94, 3 follicles in my right & 4 in my left. Rx: 150 Bravelle& 150 Menopur SQ in PM. 3/7/13: Add Ganirelix SQ in AM. hCG Trigger 3/9/13 SQ.
    ER 3/11/13: 6R, 2M, 2F. Day 3: one 8 cell, grade 0.  Five day ET 3/16/13: one early blast, grade Fair. 3/24/13 AF came a day before beta. BFN

    IVF #4: 
    (Added acupuncture to this cycle.) 3/25/13 WTF & Baseline: FSH-11.8, E2- 56, Prog- 0.84 3/26/13 Start stims. 3/30/13 u/s: 5 follicles in my right & 4 in my left. Rx: 225 Bravelle& 225 Menopur SQ in PM. 3/31/13 Add Ganirelix SQ in AM.hCG Trigger 4/3/13 SQ.
    ER 4/5/13: 5R, 3M, 3F naturally. Day 3: two 8 cell, grade 0, one 8 cell, grade 2 (Scale 0-best to 3-worst). Five day ET 4/10/13: two blastocysts (the 3rd stopped growing.) Beta 4/18/13: 2.5 BFFN. RE recommends we stop trying and focus on living childless, due to the extremely poor quality of my eggs.
    ***Decided to stop trying and live CFNBC. I couldn't adjust. So, six months later...

    IVF #5: Changed RE. Going to one of the big name clinics now. OWDU: 10/29/13. Update: HORRIBLE experience. Disgusted and distraught at their complete unprofessionalism and how much money and precious time they cost us. Sickening. Have now changed RE again. New Patient appt. 1/30/14.
    BFP! Out of nowhere, I got KU the old fashioned way! POAS 1/26/14 - Positive! FDLM 12/30/13. Beta #1 16dpo= 373. Beta #2 18dpo= 801. EDD 10/6/14
    2/4/14 1st U/S revealed a 5wk2day sac but no fetal pole. Started 200mgs of progesterone suppositories daily
    2/11/14 2nd U/S revealed a perfect 6wk1day "diamond ring" embryo with a beating heart! 138bpm! Add 1mg folic acid and 40mg Lovenox
    2/25/14 3rd U/S: perfect 8w1d embryo, 178bpm. 3/6 start spotting. 3/11 10w1d U/S shows no heartbeat. Scheduling D&C. The Stork has forsaken me again.
    IVF #5.2: New in-state RE. Supplement priming for 1.5 cycles prior to start of cycle, including DHEA 50mg (stopped 5/15), CoQ10 200mg 2x/day, L-Arginine- 1000mg 2x/day (stopped 6/5 due to cold sore!), myo-inositol- 2g 2x/day, melatonin- 3mg, and Neevo (prenatal for MTHFR).
    5/16/14 Day 2 bw cycle prior: FSH- 12.22, E2- 38.37, Prog- 1.35, LH- 9.46. 6/2/14 Day 19 bw: Prog- 23
    6/12/14 Baseline: E2- 122.7, Prog- 0.4. 5 follicles in left, 4 follicles in right. Start stims: 375IU Follistim & 150IU Menopur. 6/19 Increase Follistim to 425IU, Menopur still 150IU. 6/18 add Ganirelix. 6/23 Ovidrel trigger SQ. 6/25 ER: 8R, 8M, 5F naturally. Start Medrol & Doxy. 6/26 Start Endometrin. 7/2 Start Lovenox.
    7/8/14 Beta= 137.4 BFP!!! (My first from IVF!) E2- 1109, Prog- >60. Stop CoQ10, myo-inositol, and melatonin. 7/9 2nd Beta= 281.4. TSH- 2.70. Increasing Synthroid to 100mcg daily. 7/24 6w3d u/s measured 6w3d, hb: 121bmp! 8/5 8w1d u/s measured 8w3d, hb: 164bpm! Graduated from RE to OB. Now I just need to find an OB!
    EDD 3/18/15!

  • Really?  Dos Equis?  I'm so sorry you had to deal with that.  People really don't realize how hurtful it makes us feel when things are done like that.  You could send back a pic of your latest HSG and say that at 5 pm you were having a
    Me (37) DH (39); PCOS changed to Unexplained, changed to DOR in 2012 (finally a correct diagnosis!); 
    Started TTC 2009 with RE after 6 months.  
    Clomid + Trigger x2; 
    IUI + Femara x1,
    IUI + Follistim x2;
    IVF #1 (MDL) February 2013- BFN.
    IVF #2 (antagonist) May 2013, First BFP of my life. 
    Identical twin miracle BOYS (!!) headed our way- due date is technically 2/4/14 but c section is scheduled for 1/7! 


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