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I can't take this on!!!

+just+j++just+j+ member
in Blended Families

I can't worry about these things anymore. Why does this stress me out so much?

X just moved into his own apartment this past weekend.  Only to find out yesterday that at the end of this week he no longer has a job.  It's the same old crap. The big dogs really like him, but for one reason or another, he's out of a job.

When he told me just an hour ago, I could tell he was not at work and that he had been drinking. Even tho he swore he was not. 

The old stress that I used to feel slammed into me like a freakin' freight train. Even tho I am no longer married to him, I feel that stress like I always have.

UGH!!!  I can not take this on.  I know this, but I so badly want to cry. I don't know if it's anger, or guilt, or worry...

I give. I think it's time to go see my counselor again. I have GOT to emotionally detach myself and move on.

Oh, and by the way...I read something on how to spot a narcissist a couple weeks ago. Fits XH to a T.  While I've always known what a narcissist was...when you're in a relationship with one and so close to one...it's harder to see.   I've been battling a fight I was never going to win.

Yep.  Time to go get myself emotionally and mentally happy again because I can't spend the rest of my life worrying and taking on that stress and his crap anymore.

"he offered her the world. she said she had her own" - poet Monique Duval
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Re: I can't take this on!!!

  • Karma1969Karma1969 member
    You need to work on disengaging from his drama.  He has held you as a hostage for too long.  Tell him to call someone else.
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  • 2chatter2chatter member

    So, you just described my ex, too.  I can say I am less freaked out when I get those calls after a five years of this.  Now, I only get them as they apply to the children.  I don't get the racing heart, shaking nausea any more.  But

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  • KTdiditKTdidit member
    Not your problem. If it doesn't have to with your DD hang up. It is his issue, the only part of it that concerns you is if your DD has a safe place to go during his parenting time.
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  • +just+j++just+j+ member

    2chatter, that was the only thing that made me feel better - that I can't let him move back in.  I moved into an apartment. There's no room.  And the house is going back to the bank next month so that's not an option either.

    I don't ca

    "he offered her the world. she said she had her own" - poet Monique Duval
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  • 2chatter2chatter member
    Oh your story is so similar to mine....we lost our home too - he told me he had paid the mortgage, turned out the checks coming out were cashier's checks he made to himself.  Luckily or not, I still had a rental property, our starter home, so returne
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  • PhantomgirlPhantomgirl member
    imageKarma1969:
    You need to work on disengaging from his drama.nbsp; He has held you as a hostage for too long.nbsp; Tell him to call so
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  • Littlejen22Littlejen22 member
    I love how every time he loses a job he says the people higher up love him but he still loses his job. Once or twice is bad luck but beyond that means the higher ups do not love you and that they in fact do not want you because they make the decisions. Th
    Jen - Mom to two December 12 babies Nathaniel 12/12/06 and Addison 12/12/08
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  • NineoceansNineoceans member
    imageKarma1969:
    You need to work on disengaging from his drama.nbsp; He has held you as a hostage for too long.nbsp; Tell him to call so
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  • jenjen930jenjen930 member
    This happenned with my EXH too.  The minute we seperated he went nuts spending money on stuff I wouldn't let him have for yerars (he was very irresponsible with money).  Then he lost his job like a week later.  Which resulted in his ca
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  • stephcarterstephcarter member
    image+just+j+:

    Yep.  Time to go get myself emotionally and mentally happy again because I can't spend the rest of my life worr


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