Trouble TTC

XP:Just when I'm doing good...the IF coaster throws me on a loop

I've been doing pretty good the past two weeks on this IF roller coaster. However, this morning at church, I was thrown on a loop!!! It's Palm Sunday, and what better way does our church celebrate that? Yep! They send out ALL the kids waving Palm branches down every.single.isle! For what seemed like 60 hours, it was really about 4 minutes, I was trying not to look at the kids, I was trying not to hear all the "ooos and ahhs" and "how sweet" and "look, there's little Katie" by the end of that segment, I was bawling! I was once again reminded of what I don't have! Of what I will NEVER have naturally!! It was like the knife was going through my heart all over again!!! And, to make things worse, my DH is on the praise and worship team, so he wasn't here to console me. I did have a friend sitting behind me, and they were there to give me a big hug...but then I felt like a dummy for crying. It's not those kid's fault..it's not the parent's fault that I'm infertile. I just couldn't hold back the tears as hard as I tried to. I couldn't help but thinking, I should be holding MY baby through this, I should be looking for MY baby a new easter dress/suit! NOT standing here bawling my eyes out because I don't know when this will happen for me! I absolutley HATE this, and I know you all do too! I know it's not the answer, but I am enjoying a few beers this afternoon....I just need to relax, it seems like the only way I can do that these days. :/
I just can't tell you ladies enough how blessed I am to have found this site! Your support is amazing!!!
Thanks for letting me get this out!!
Me 28 DH 30 Married 08-11-07 TTC since 07/11 HSG 01-21-13 Left FTB Seeing RE 1-28-13 RE 1-28-13 Both tubes blocked LAP surgery 2-15-13 Both tubes removed Started IVF #1 June 2013 Meds: BCP, Lupron, Gonal-F, Ovidrel, Medrol, Doxycycline
Beta #1-BFP!!! HCG-55 Beta #2--111 Beta #3--2,825 Beta #4 22,031 1st U/S 7-29-13 Saw and heard our little sweet pea's heartbeat!! 109 bpm 


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Re: XP:Just when I'm doing good...the IF coaster throws me on a loop

  • Sorry you are having a bad IF day. Big ((hugs)) coming your way!
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  • I am sorry you are having such a hard day. Glad you are able to relax with a few beers. :)
    TTC since June 2011
    SA - Normal CD3 Bloodwork - Normal HSG- All clear!
    July 2012 50mg Clomid CD3-7 Trigger+TI = BFN
    August 2012 50mg Clomid CD3-7 Trigger+IUI = BFN
    September 2012 50mg Clomid CD3-7 Trigger+IUI = BFN
    October 4th LAP - Mild Endo - All Removed
    Treatment Break 3 cycles = BFN
    1st Treatment Cycle Post Lap --
    February 2013 50mg Clomid CD3-7 Trigger+IUI = BFN
    March 2013 50mg Clomid CD3-7 Trigger+IUI = BFN
    April 2013 Break Cycle ~~~ May 2013 Meet with RE discuss next steps
    July 2013 IVF ~ Stims start 6/28
    
ER 7/10 20R/14M/14F
    Day 3 - 10 Embryos
    ET 7/15 Transferred 1 Blast on day 5 - Froze 6
    7/24 Beta 1 150 7/26 Beta 2 313 7/30 Beta 3 1,084 Beta 4 3,000 Beta 5 8,120 1st U/S 8/8 image
  • Sorry you're having a rough IF day.

    Anniversary

    <a href="http://www.thebump.com/?utm_source=ticker&utm_medium=HTML&utm_campaign=tickers" title="Getting Pregnant"><img src="http://global.thebump.com/tickers/tt1b3729.aspx" alt=" BabyFetus Ticker" border="0"  /></a>

    Married 8/21/2010, Off BCP April 2011, Started TTC 10/2011

  • I am sorry today was rough.  I hope tomorrow is a better day.
    TTC since June 2010:  Blocked tubes due to Endo
    IVF July 2013

    4/2 accepted into New Hope Fertility Clinical Trial in NYC 
    7/5 ET one blast transferred
    7/12 first beta 7dp5dt:  39  Pregnant!!!
    7/15 Beta: 146
    7/19 Beta: 935
    7/26 Beta: 14,671

  • I am so sorry you are having a rough IF day, ((hugs)) hope tomorrow is better for you.
    My Ovulation Chart
    TTC since 0ct. 2011
    Me-34,DH-34
    Dx:Hypothyroidism 2008
    HSG- All clear CD 3 bloodwork normal
    SA- Abnormal Dx:MFI
    DH on 50mg Clomid 3x week
    BFP#1- 1/21/13 CP 1/24/13
    Cycle 18,19 & 20 50mg Clomid+trigger+IUI= All BFFN
    Cycle 21-25 Taking a break for now, still HIO Hoping!
    Moving onto IVF Next AF
    (PAIF/SAIF Welcome)
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  • I am so very sorry you are dealing with this.  It's like one step forward, then two steps back on a day like today.  Hope you are feeling better soon, and I'm so glad you found us too!

    Off BC since 9/10;TTC since 7/11
    Me: 31 DH: 31
    DX: PCOS/anovulatory/Hypothyroid
    SA: normal
    HSG: all clear
    5 cycles of Clomid/Femara + TI
    IUI #1 (7/16/12) Femara 2.5,+ Trigger=BFN
    Treatment break Aug. 2012-June 2013
    IUI #2 (7/27/13)=BFP!!!
    Beta #1 @ 13dpiui --145!
    Beta #2 @ 19dpiui--2,550!
    BabyFetus Ticker
  • I am sorry today was such a rough day. Big hugs to you.
    TTC #1 since May 2006 - We thought we were done in 2010, but we are back again!
    PCOS (anovulatory and amenorrhea) and hypothyroid.
    Currently taking Metformin 1500 MG and Synthroid.
    Prior HSG and DH SAs were clear.
    Feb 2013 - Switched clinics/RE and starting from the beginning again with some modifications.
    Current status: CD 3 appointment showed lining was too thick (11.5 mm). Endometrial biopsy scheduled for CD 11. Next steps will be based on results.
    All welcome to respond.
    March TTTC Siggy Challenge: Internet Memes
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  • I'm sorry! I can certainly sympathize. While church is an extremely uplifting experience for me, I also find it a bit difficult sometimes. Our church has all the babies/kids come join the parents halfway through service so they can receive communion, and
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    Married October 2009. Me 29 H 28.
    After 1 year of infertility, our little miracle was conceived via our 3rd IUI on May 5, 2013.
    Holland Sophia was born Jan 24, 2014.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • {{{hugs}}}.  I'm sorry today was rough and I hope tomorrow is better!
    TTC #1 since November 2011
    Me 32, DH 32
    Dx: Unexplained IF
    RE consult October 2012 
    Clomid and IUI Nov 2012-March 2013 BFNs
    IVF#1 on CD10! April 2013 - ER (27 retrieved, 19 fertilized) 4/21 - ET cancelled due to OHSS. 10 frosties 
    FET#1 w/ one blast May 2013-BFN
    FET #2 w/ one blast July 2013-BFP!!! Beta 9dp5dt: 129 Beta 13dp5dt: 867 Beta 20dp5dt: 13621 Beta 27dp5dt: 53341 U/S #1: 7/31 heartbeat 127 measuring right on time EDD March 20th, 2014
    IAmPregnant Tickerimage
  • I am so sorry hun (((hugs))) here's to hoping your day (and all of ours) are coming soon. 
    imageimage



    TTC #1** Went off BCP July 2011

    Me: 31 DH:31


    Jan 2012 Dx PCOS by OB/Gyn


    July 2012 - Tests with RE confirmed PCOS and annovulation

    2 rounds of clomid, 5 IUI's using clomid + injectibles. 

    Surprise BFP while on break cycle due to cysts.  It's a girl! Baby "E" born on Thanksgiving Day 11/28/13


  • I'm sorry your having a bad IF day. Big Hugs




  • aww, I'm so sorry!! **Hugs!!**
    Anniversary Image and video hosting by TinyPic
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    3TC March Siggy Challenge: Funny Internet Meme Image and video hosting by TinyPic
    Age: Me 26, DH 27, Married Oct. 10, 2009 ,TTC since March 2012
    Problem: Irregular menstruation, unexplained
    Nov&Dec-Provera because of no period after 35+ days
    First RE appt 1/10/2013
    Tests: TSH (normal), Prolactin (normal), SA (abnormal)
    Hysteroscopy (normal) and PCOS labs (negative/normal) 1/15/2013
    2/1/13- HPT BFP but Beta Hcg was negative
    Plan: Femara + Trigger + IUI in April if no real BFP before then Bloggy Blog!
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