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Not Invited to Baby Shower

Abs211981Abs211981 member
in Babies on the Brain

I've been on the Knot for a few years, so I didn't know which board this subject belonged on....

 

One of my good friends had a baby shower this weekend and I was the only one in our circle not invited.  I'm not best friends with this girl, but there are several of us who always do things together.  She recently had a Christmas and Valentine's party (separately) and I am the only girl out of all of the guests at both parties who didn't get a baby shower invite.

 I know the standard answers that apply to not getting invited to a wedding apply somewhat here (it's the person of honor's ultimate decision as to who to invite, etc), but I don't really know what to do....

 I'm worried I may have did something to hurt her feelings, but definitely don't want to bring it up, lest it be made into a much bigger deal.  I know several times invites I sent for my wedding got lost in the mail, and I guess a part of me wants to hope this was the case.

 I've had a gift for her for a few months but now I'm getting all weird and overthinking whether or not to even give it to her. If I do that now, do I risk looking like I'm trying to be passive aggressive and pointing out that "hey, I wanted to give you a gift since so that you know that I found out you had a shower and didn't invite me".

 I really don't harbor any hard feelings.  She is perfectly free to invite whomever she chooses, but it does suck big time to literally be the only one left out.  

 Do I nix the gift and get my money back?  Or do I give it to her and make sure not to bring up anything about our other friends or other gifts when I drop it off? 

TTC since February 2014

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Re: Not Invited to Baby Shower

  • Disneygeek77Disneygeek77 member

    Have you already donated items to her ?

    Is this her first baby ?

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  • Abs211981Abs211981 member
    imagestw_77:

    Have you already donated items to her ?

    Is this her first baby ?

     No, I hav

    TTC since February 2014

    image

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  • Abs211981Abs211981 member

    imageSpooko:
    I'd still give the gift. I wouldn't bring it up, though.

     

    I definitely wouldn't a

    TTC since February 2014

    image

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  • CourtimilkCourtimilk member
    If she and her baby meant enough to you to get a gift, then give her the gift. You can consider it a blessing in disguise as you can hand over the gift in person or over tea/coffee instead of being one-of-several-gift-givers at the baby shower.
    "What are you having?" "Well the radiologist says its a healthy little human baby. I'm a little disappointed, because I really wanted a puppy." LOL
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  • thatoneredheadthatoneredhead member

    To be perfectly honest, I would have no problem returning it. You could also wait until the baby is here. That's what I did when I got baby-shower burned. Or you could just wa

    image
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  • FemShepFemShep member

    Let it go.  She may have had tight guest constraints, she may have given your name to the host to invite but the invite got lost....  Unfortunately, there's no way of finding out what happened.  Saying anything now would only make her fe

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  • outnumberedoutnumbered member

    My friend had her bridal shower 3 years ago.  One of her good friends was not present.  The bride to be even commented at the shower that she missed her.  Turns out the friend never received an invitation because it was sent to the wrong

    Smiley: April '05 Rocky: May '06 Tex: July '09
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  • thatoneredheadthatoneredhead member
    imagefredalina:
    imageGhostMonkey
    image
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  • Runaway22Runaway22 member

    First: ouch,

    Second: I'd give her the gift either post-baby or just as a casual, "oh, hey, I got you this" kinda thing. I wouldn't mention the shower. Actually, depending on the day, I *might* ask how it went. But sometimes I fail at being social

    Pregnancy Ticker
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