How long will I need help?
EMLDF
member
Hello - I 35 weeks and 2 days pregnant. My baby is currently breech and although I am actively trying a few things to flip her, I'm also preparing myself for a C-Section. Both my husband's parents and my parents live out of state. My husband is still unclear about how much paternity leave he will get. (he is a teacher and the contact was just renewed so they are still nailing down the finer points).
My questions is - for how long might it be necessary that I have 24/7 help? I know every woman and every C-section is different, but I am trying to get a sense for planning purposes. Unfortunately, my mother (and MIL) both work so they don't have unlimited days and weeks to spend with us. I have some extended family and plenty of friends in the area, but again - they work!
I'm already so anxious about the possibility of surgery and it just dawned on me how really hard this might be for us. I suppose worst case scenario is that my husband will take off more time, which is fine too. Just looking for an idea about how long I won't be able to care for myself and the baby.
Thanks!
Re: How long will I need help?
Other than my DH, I don't have any other help. I'm basically on my own after a week. I've had really good c-sections (all 4 of them) and recoveries.
I would imagine that the hardest period is the first 2 weeks........
I had a perfect textbook C/S and recovery. The only time I needed full on 24/7 help was the first week. 4 days of that, I was in the hospital. The first couple days home, I was really sore, so it just took me longer to get up and get around. I didn't *need* help then, but it was seriously nice to have it. I needed most help at night. Getting up from laying flat was the hardest part of my recovery.
As far as driving, I was told by the nurses at the hospital that I shouldn't drive until the OB clears it. OB said as long as I was off the narcotic meds for 24 hours, I was fine to drive if I felt comfortable. I drove myself to my 3 week checkup.
After 7 years of no ovulation...
BFP#1 10/24/11 ~ EDD 6/29/12 ~ Natural m/c 11/2/11
BFP#2 2/3/12 ~ Alice born 9/26/12
I am working on my second week after a C-section, and I ended up asking my husband to take another week off because even though I could have likely done it on my own this week... it would have been hard (physically and mentally) to do everything rather then split duties and likely would have slowed down the rest of my recovery. So personally, I would recommend a minimum of two weeks if you can swing it. But it is different for everyone.
Good luck!
My c-section was unplanned but my family all stepped up to the plate. I was not allowed to drive for two weeks or carry anything heavier than the baby. My Mom came for one week and my MIL came for the second week. By the end of the second week, I was really feeling okay. It was really nice to have her though help clean and cook food. She also drove me to a couple appointments.
I think that because I had a lot of help, I was able to heal faster. My job was just to heal and feed the baby. I was one lucky gal. My advice would be to take anyone up who offers to bring a meal or help with errands.
That being said, I just had my second csection and being divorced I'm now a single parent. Almost all my "help" backed out. I had someone with me the first day and night at the hospital and the second night. After that I got a ride home and was left alone with baby for a week. Then my 2 1/2 year old joined the party! I've survived. Had to drive at 1 1/2 weeks out which probably would not thrill my doctor but it's doable.
Try to get help the first week at least to make it easiest. Someone to watch LO while you shower, someone to run to the grocery store. But you dont really need 24 hr coverage. And after that it all starts falling in to place. Sleep deprived place but still a place!
Thanks again everyone! I actually just found out my husband gets two weeks paid so sounds like even w/out outside help I'll be ok! Ever since I found out she is breech, I've been so anxious about every little thing and I think exaggerating the difficulty of recovery in my head.
Thanks again and good luck to everyone!
A lot would depend on stairs as silly as it may sound. I was told to avoid them during the first couple weeks which meant I was not to do our laundry, so FI and my mom had to. Also, to maximize your independence you may want to consider having the essentials on the same level/floor of the house to further avoid stairs.
My point is: Stairs + Abdominal Surgery = No Fun.
my mom stayed for two weeks and it was great. I was ready to go by the end of that time. You will be fine!
We were lucky to have 24/7 help (thanks mom and dad, for footing the bill), and originally planned to have her for 2 weeks. That would have been long enough, but I overdid it during that time and got a really bad cold, so we kept her one extra week. This time my mom insisted we plan on 3 weeks, between the CS and already having DD, who will only be 14.5 months old.
My advice would be that however long you have that help, take advantage of that time to take care of yourself, or you'll wish you had. Let them help you with everything. You might feel like you're missing out, but I assure you, there's nothing major going on that won't be happening a week or two later, so rest up!
IVF #1: 9/11: ER: 12R, 11M, 10F, No Frosties; 5dt: 2 blasts, 1 morula; DD born 6/3/12
IVF #2: 11/12-12/12: ER: 20R, 20M, 16F, 4 Frosties; 5dt: 3 blasts, DS born 8/9/13
All of this for me too. I had what I would consider a very easy recovery.
I had DS1 already, my twins were born on Thursday, sent home on Monday. DH took off the rest of that week and went back to work the following Monday. I was on my own with 3 LO's (DS1 was 27m) 12 days after the birth and did fine.
GSx1 - 05/13/2013
GSx2 for T&B - EDD 6/21/2015 - They're having a GIRL!
I would plan on two weeks. That's likely how long it will be until you are cleared to drive again.