Real vs. Pretend: how much do I say? — The Bump
Pre-School

Real vs. Pretend: how much do I say?

DD asks TONS of questions and is very perceptive. I don't want to crush her world if she wants to think some pretend things are real right now, but I also don't want her to be confused. She seems to think that tv show characters are real, and I don't know how to answer the questions she has about them. I.e. do I tell her straight out that the Backyardigans aren't really real? What about dragons and fairies? Believing in some of that stuff is fun and I don't want to be too realistic since she's only 4. She's asked Backyardigan questions like, 

What did they look like when they were babies?

What do their parents look like?

Why do we never see their parents?

When do they put their costumes on for their adventures? How do they get their costumes back off at the end?

And, for Blue's Clues, "How come Tickety can talk? Most clocks don't really talk!" For awhile she would yell, "hi Steve!" and ask if Steve could see us through the tv but she seems to be past that now. 

I had to explain yesterday that Olivia isn't like other pigs (do Olivia and her friends like to get muddy?) and kind of indicated vaguely that she's pretend, but didn't know how far to go with it. 

Oh, and yesterday she asked the nanny if Santa is going to die someday, and what about Rudolph? Yikes!

We ARE doing Santa, Easter Bunny, etc., FYI.  

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Re: Real vs. Pretend: how much do I say?

  • meh, I'm not sure what the "right" answer is here, but we talk ALOT about pretend/make believe and real. 

    I want to have fun pretending but still understand that pigs can't really talk.  So far it hasn't seemed to upset her or anythi

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  • Oh, yeah, just FYI on the death question--her great-grandpa died in Nov. 2011, her great-grandma in May 2012, and my parent's dog just died, so that's where that's coming from. I think we've handled the questions about the great-grandparents and the dog o
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  • When ds asks if superheros are real, I answer with "Some people think so".   Not a yes and not a no, but not avoiding answering. 

    I also throw a "That's a good question!" when avoiding bursting his bubble about make believe questi

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  • Great answers!  We do not do Santa and Easter Bunny- that was decided when at 2.5 DD#1 was told by a santa that he would come into her house through the chimney and eat the cookies she made.  That was when pretend/magical became a little too

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  • I think my daughter is figuring some of this out on her own. Lately on the way to school we've been having a conversation that goes like this: "Mommy, in the Little Mermaid, Flounder talks. That's silly. Fish don't talk. Who else doesn't talk?" So then

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  • DS and I have conversations like this all the time. I tend to play along.
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