how do I be a good mom

bethLenell · March 2013

Hi everyone. I've been lurking over here from TTCAL and think that this is a good place to ask this question. I know it could be hurtful to the ladies over in TTCAL that are still trying for their first babies.

A little background... I have a daughter who is 2 and a half, I had PPD with her and so we waited a little longer than originally planned to try for number 2. Found out we were pregnant in November and lost our little one (natural m/c) on December 27th.

Obviously since then I've been very emotional. The thing that I'm worried about and seems to be happening is that I'm more easily frustrated and irritated by my DD. I love her so much but I can yell at her and get mad at her so quickly and for such stupid reasons...ie potty training accidents...not going to bed easily...things like that. Totally reasonable things for a 2 year old to be doing. I know I would never hurt her or anything like that but I have made her cry and that just really hurts me that I've done that and makes me feel like a horrible mom. It also brings back my mind games of losing my baby because I don't deserve another one. My counselor has been helpful with tips on anger control and things like that but she's never had a loss and so I don't think she really gets what I'm going through.

I know this is getting long for a new poster on a board but I guess I just need a little advice from people who have been there.

Thanks for reading and TIA for any advice

karma79 · March 2013

I don't have experience with this but I wanted to tell you how sorry I am that you are feeling so low. I think it is a good thing that you recognize that this is happening and stick to your counselor for help with some coping mechanisms for

JulyMomma2U2 · March 2013

(((((huge hugs)))))))

I can relate a bit to what you're saying. Hormones are intense when you're pregnant.. I, too, have struggled with losing my patience so much quicker than I normally would and I am really hard on myself for that.

bethLenell · March 2013

shell041783:
YGPM.

Thanks and you too

bethLenell · March 2013

JulyMomma2U2:
(((((huge hugs)))))))
I can relate a bit to what you're saying. Hormones are intense when you're pre

adoxyinherear · March 2013

It is SO hard being a parent, and children are the very best at trying our nerves and our patience. Your daughter knows that you love her, and while you may feel bad for losing your temper, you're only human. It's okay to get angry and upset, and feeling

bethLenell · March 2013

Thank you so much for all your help and advice ladies. I may spend more time over here as opposed to the 24 months+ board just because not all of them know what it's like to lose a little one.

Junebug060609 · March 2013

I'm so sorry for your loss, and I'm sorry one of the responses here was full of pregnancy related stuff...probably not what you needed to read today. I haven't dealt with PPD, but I have had a loss since having my son. As a parent, even wit

melly918 · March 2013

I am very sorry for your loss. As for your concern about yelling at your LO, you are not alone. When I was on maternity leave recently, my relationship with my 3 year old changed a lot. He wanted my attention especially when I was busy with DD and he

JulyMomma2U2 · March 2013

bethLenell:
JulyMomma2

bethLenell · March 2013

I like the mommy needs a time out idea, I give them to her sometimes (or try to) so it could help her see what you are supposed to do in one as well haha!!

bethLenell · March 2013

JulyMomma2U2:
bethLene

orangegoggles · March 2013

Just wanted to send hugs! I'm just beginning my journey with parenting so I don't have much advice but from reading your post I get the impression that you are a wonderful mother. I am so sorry for your loss, hang in there mama.

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