Honestly, Im just wondering- What is so special about being one and done? I have a feeling every 2 posts are going to be, "How did you know you only wanted one???"
What special considerations do one-hit-wonder parents have?
Maybe issues that parents deal with having an only child? Topics such as loneliness, sharing, socialization, self esteem etc all related to their LOs being the only child...
It's nice to have others to chat with that may be struggling with the same issues etc..
It took a lot of us a long time to have just one. Dealing with the feelings of not giving LO siblings or having to adjust your outlook on the family you thought you would have one day are hard to deal with.
after 2+ years, 3 failed IUIs, 2 failed IVFs with a c/p IVF#3 brought us our miracle baby girl on June 26, 2012
Maybe those who are "one and done" not by choice? Like if their SO decided they didn't wany anymore, and how to cope with that?
Our TTC Journey
TTC #1: May 2011 BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12 DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018 Me: 36 | DH: 39 Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled 9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks 10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN 11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst 3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP 11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
Maybe it should have just been called "Only Child" - the term "one and done" can kind of put people off...
Our TTC Journey
TTC #1: May 2011 BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12 DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018 Me: 36 | DH: 39 Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled 9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks 10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN 11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst 3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP 11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
Maybe those who are "one and done" not by choice? Like if their SO decided they didn't wany anymore, and how to cope with that?
This was one of the points we talked about when deciding to start the board.
Not only are there a lot of unique situations when raising a single child, there are also a lot of emotional struggles that come up when you are One and Done. Like if you decide you can't have another because of financial obligations, or if your SO doesn't want another one, or if you physically are unable to have another child.
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Maybe those who are "one and done" not by choice? Like if their SO decided they didn't wany anymore, and how to cope with that?
This was one of the points we talked about when deciding to start the board.
Not only are there a lot of unique situations when raising a single child, there are also a lot of emotional struggles that come up when you are One and Done. Like if you decide you can't have another because of financial obligations, or if your SO doesn't want another one, or if you physically are unable to have another child.
Ah. That makes more sense. Maybe it was just late but I was really struggling to think of things that would be discussed over there.
Or maybe Im just scared of the idea of having another so none of these things crossed my mind!
Maybe those who are "one and done" not by choice? Like if their SO decided they didn't wany anymore, and how to cope with that?
This was one of the points we talked about when deciding to start the board.
Not only are there a lot of unique situations when raising a single child, there are also a lot of emotional struggles that come up when you are One and Done. Like if you decide you can't have another because of financial obligations, or if your SO doesn't want another one, or if you physically are unable to have another child.
Ah. That makes more sense. Maybe it was just late but I was really struggling to think of things that would be discussed over there.
Or maybe Im just scared of the idea of having another so none of these things crossed my mind!
LOL!
We had a lot of discussion on the SAHM board about it before I asked BJ to add the board. We figured there's a multiple board, a 2U2 board, why not an only child?
The other new ones are Food and Nutrition, Birthday Parties, and Home Schooling. I love the homeschooling one! I'm skeptical about the other two.
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Probably some of the rude things people say when you tell them you are only having one, how to deal with family pressure to have more, the emotions involved in deciding you are one and done (whether for financial reasons, IF reasons, or your spouse is done but you aren't sure), how to get them proper socialization and around other kids, how to handle if your child starts asking for a sibling, etc. etc. etc.
For us... it was a very difficult, painful, and emotional process to get pregnant. It simply isn't something that we can imagine attempting again.
It is also a financial decision for us. We can easily enjoy our lives with one child but starts to get difficult with two. Yes, I do know this as I have two SSs who live with us full-time. I am going to be paying for two college tuitions and day care at the same time. We can give LO the type of ideal childhood we want her to have without sacrificing our own future.
My DH is older than me. Having one child still enables DH to retire at his preferred time and we can still live out our dreams.
LO will have three cousins who are less than a year from her age.
together since 2006
full time stepmom to SS1 and SS2 since 2010
married since 2011
TTC since 7/2011 (no planned bc since 2008)
HSG 11/2011: one blocked tube
S/A 2/2012 and retest S/A 3/2012: normal
Bloodwork: normal
2nd HSG 5/2012: clear
Femara cycle 5mg #1 7/14/12 + IUI #1 7/23/12 = bfn
New RE appt 8/14/12
IVF #1 meds 8/30/12. ER 9/14/2012: 7 retrieved, 6 fertilized. ET 9/19/12: 1 perfect embryo 5dt. Beta #1 BFP! 97 Beta #2 234 Beta #3 4937 ultrasound #1 heart beat 127 10/20/12 graduated!!! EDD 6/7/12 Team PINK!!
Re: So... (one and done board)
Maybe issues that parents deal with having an only child? Topics such as loneliness, sharing, socialization, self esteem etc all related to their LOs being the only child...
It's nice to have others to chat with that may be struggling with the same issues etc..
IVF#3 brought us our miracle baby girl on June 26, 2012
BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12
DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018
Me: 36 | DH: 39
Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years
BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving
July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF
August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled
9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks
10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN
11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst
3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP
11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12
DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018
Me: 36 | DH: 39
Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years
BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving
July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF
August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled
9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks
10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN
11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst
3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP
11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
Ah. That makes more sense. Maybe it was just late but I was really struggling to think of things that would be discussed over there.
Or maybe Im just scared of the idea of having another so none of these things crossed my mind!
For us... it was a very difficult, painful, and emotional process to get pregnant. It simply isn't something that we can imagine attempting again.
It is also a financial decision for us. We can easily enjoy our lives with one child but starts to get difficult with two. Yes, I do know this as I have two SSs who live with us full-time. I am going to be paying for two college tuitions and day care at the same time. We can give LO the type of ideal childhood we want her to have without sacrificing our own future.
My DH is older than me. Having one child still enables DH to retire at his preferred time and we can still live out our dreams.
LO will have three cousins who are less than a year from her age.
full time stepmom to SS1 and SS2 since 2010
married since 2011
TTC since 7/2011 (no planned bc since 2008)
HSG 11/2011: one blocked tube
S/A 2/2012 and retest S/A 3/2012: normal
Bloodwork: normal
2nd HSG 5/2012: clear
Femara cycle 5mg #1 7/14/12 + IUI #1 7/23/12 = bfn
New RE appt 8/14/12
IVF #1 meds 8/30/12. ER 9/14/2012: 7 retrieved, 6 fertilized. ET 9/19/12: 1 perfect embryo 5dt.
Beta #1 BFP! 97
Beta #2 234
Beta #3 4937
ultrasound #1 heart beat 127
10/20/12 graduated!!!
EDD 6/7/12
Team PINK!!